To not speak to my husband over Brexit!

[telvg]

So does anyone virtually want a divorce because their partner agrees with No Deal? I feel like telling my husband, when we have no money and food prices are sky high, or if someone we know can’t get medicine they need, that it’s his fault for supporting Brexit and No Deal. I don’t understand why people are so short sighted and can’t see the bigger picture. Everyone my age (mid 40s) and younger, who went to University, is anti Brexit, or at least anti No Deal. Even the most staunch, Middle Class over 60s, don’t support No Deal. The only ones who do, appear to be uneducated, ignorant or racist, homophonic, sexist etc type people. So why does my husband agree with it? I feel he’s not the man I married. So am I being unreasonable to feel this way?

Listening to Radio 4 this morning (uneducated working class oik that I am ) and there was a discussion on Britain's duty to help those in Hong Kong - making it easier for them to settle here and speeding up the entire process of coming into the UK, getting rid of some of the red tape, etc.

There is also an article here on this:

www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2019/jun/14/britain-hong-kong-china-power-extradition-chris-patten

My point being that if anyone voted Brexit for racist reasons they are in for a shock Things are going to keep happening round the world, this world the UK is very much a part of, and we are going to continue to try and help others where we can - rightly so.

And I do think it says so much that people responding to people like me and who oppose a no deal don't acknowledge the horrible health situations me and others are going through, or say yes it must be scary etc, but are happy to address all other points. While I've said I don't vilify people with a differing opinion / experience to me. Compassion and empathy seems to be severely lacking.

I didn't vote for Brexit. No deal feels alarming to me because I'm on two medications I must absolutely have daily. Not getting them would kill me. It's not a case of just feeling better when I take them. I MUST have them. So yes, I am worried, but I hope that if my husband voted Brexit I would still be okay with his right to his own opinion.

I just don't believe that anyone who voted for Brexit meant for people to end up without medications and so on. The government need to manage how Brexit is to be handled. They gave the people the vote and have had three years to sort this out. If the government bugger it up, it's not Brexit voters' fault. If the government really believed Brexit would cause the collapse of the country and deaths of its citizens, why on earth was the vote made possible in the first place?

The irony is it is UNBELIEVABLY unintelligent and narrow minded to imagine that 17 million people, that's 17,000,000 people, all had the same reasons for voting leave and all of them negative. It's beyond absurd.

It's the job if the ordinary person on the street to say broadly where we want the country to go and the job of our 'educated' MPs to deliver it. Not to decide to override it.
It wasn't the ordinary people who got us do embroiled in this organisation that's it's virtually impossible to get out!

@Lifecraft

Errr.....but they do know better than the ordinary person on the street. That's why they are MPs. Most MPs are well educated and well read. The ordinary person in the street is as thick as pigshit.

The irony is that you sound really, really uneducated saying this. What a horrible, nasty and small minded attitude. The "ordinary person" may not have had access to the kind of education you're referring to.

Funnily enough, spending a significant part of my childhood in the care system has given me a better understanding of the care system than someone who is well versed when it comes to Jane Austen and Chaucer. I fall into both categories as I worked my arse off to study English Literature at a RG university.

I paid more in tax than the average "ordinary MP in the street" every year for the last 7 years. Taxpayers like me pay their wages. They represent you and the "ordinary person" in the street. It's called democracy.

@astralplaning

I just don't believe that anyone who voted for Brexit meant for people to end up without medications and so on.

I would have agreed with this until threads like this that show an absolute lack of empathy or acknowledgment for situations where people will end up without medication.

People are well within their rights to say they voted for Brexit and don't regret it as a whole but are upset this kind of thing could be a knock on effect on people who rely on medication to survive. Like I do. I am not scaremongering, it genuinely could result in a fit that kills me.

I haven't seen any Brexiteers acknowledge that part (medication being unavailable) of posts challenging them. It's a shame.

Curly of course no one wants you to be without medicine. Or to be in a position where you need to worry about it. I do think it was the responsibility of the govt, who've had 3 years to get this sorted, to ensure sufficient stick is in place

To address your other point, successive govts have hidden behind the EU when offloading blame for things they were, in fact, responsible for and membership has served them well. I think leaving will mean there's nowhere to hide in future - the govt will have to be more accountable. I hope to see an end to the EU gravy train that failed politicians have enjoyed for far too long on public money.

Depends why he voted.

Aderyn, that's bullshit. Plenty of Brexiters think the possibility of people like me going without meds is really funny. I mean, we're just disabled trash, you know? We're just a joke to them. I'm just glad that the worst I'll have to suffer is mental problems.

I am not scaremongering, it genuinely could result in a fit that kills me

I hear you on that. I've been on steroids for 10+. years.I will likely need them all my life. I can't breathe easily without them. I have a progressive disease. If I miss a dose, I could be in adrenal shutdown within 24 hours. I am supposed to carry a card/jewellery that explains this should I be in an accident and cannot tell medical staff I am on these drugs.

I also take an anti-arrhythmic which one of the more unusual ones and again I must have this or my heart will go haywire.

In fact, as you will know yourself, the stress of worrying about this is more likely to bring on an attack of our illnesses. I do understand

I must admit I am new to the Brexit boards so I was not aware of the lack of empathy. What I will say is, to those who truly don't seem to care, bear in mind that even if neither you nor any loved ones are currently on meds, an accident can happen to anyone anytime and you never know when you might need medical intervention. Life can change for any of us in an instant.

Phil I know literally no one who thinks lack of medicine is funny or who thinks disabled people are trash. You do know that some disabled people voted for Brexit too?

@Aderyn19

Curly of course no one wants you to be without medicine. Or to be in a position where you need to worry about it. I do think it was the responsibility of the govt, who've had 3 years to get this sorted, to ensure sufficient stick is in place

I appreciate you saying this and it's what I'm talking about - you've addressed my legitimate fear and the very real consequences for me so I appreciate that.

My main issue is with the posters (and people in real life) who neglect to address the experience of myself and other people directly affected.

So thank you I do appreciate you addressing it. The fact is I am in this position and it will likely harm my health.

I'm more worried about the kids with illnesses like mine who won't be able to get their medicine. It's a real consequence and it should be OK for brexiteers to say fuck, we were not told about all the consequences of this decision.

This is directed not even so much as Brexit voters but those saying they support no deal.

Again, if no deal means medicine shortages (which it absolutely does) and their kids had life threatening illnesses that would be impacted, I simply don't believe they would still support no deal.

You say "of course" nobody wants me to be without medication but you're the only person who has even responded to people in the predicament I am and acknowledged this.

It may be the responsibility of the government but it's sick peoples who are going to suffer - it doesn't matter whose "fault" it is, Brexit voters are allowed to feel empathy for those of us fucked over by the outcome (which you have and I appreciate)

I'm not even arguing how people voted originally, I'm challenging those who say No Deal is their preference or is fine with them.

Thank you for acknowledging the very real consequences for people like me I really do appreciate that

I got to over 40yo without a night in hospital, never darkened the door of my GP, never even had aspirin in the house. Enjoyed great health throughout my entire life. Then, it all went wrong...basically, I was healthy until I wasn't!

I'm about as remain as you can get, but even I think no deal would be preferable to continuing this sodding political paralysis indefinitely.

i know literally no one who thinks lack of medicine is funny or who thinks disabled people are trash. You do know that some disabled people voted for Brexit too?

Yes but that doesn't help the vast majority of disabled people this will affect!

We aren't saying that when confronted with a disabled person, voters wouldn't sympathise - but read this board and you can see that behind keyboards people have literally responded to people like me saying they are scared of dying without acknowledging that part of their post!

Some gay people think you can go to gay conversion and become heterosexual, that doesn't make racism ok?!

Some women thinks a woman's place is in the home and they shouldn't want any other kind of life, that doesn't make sexism ok??

Sorry was angry typing and combined examples! That was meant to say:

Some gay people think you can go to gay conversion and become heterosexual, that doesn't make homophobia ok?!

@ThatCurlyGirl In my opinion and I want to stress the point that it's mine, your concerns regarding medication and the potential lack of, trump this discussion on bailing on your spouse because views are not shared. To me they are a nonsense (everyone feel free to shoot me down, I don't care).

I can totally understand your concerns (and I mean really understand) and to be honest out of this whole brexit debacle, it's the only thing I give any headspace. I have whats classed a life limiting illness and have a large cocktail of medication, who knows if there will be shortages of mine. So, the outcome for me if I don't have it? Within a week I would be a cripple and in constant agony (it's bad enough now with the medication). The longer term I'm not thinking about.

For one reason or another I can't get passionate and upset about all of this. I hear it on the news day in and day out and just switch off.

My attitude is, whatever happens, happens. There is nothing I can personally do about it, I have no influence on whatever happens in the next couple of months. If I was asked the question do I worry? Well yes I do, but not for me, but for my wife and boys for all of the reasons above and nothing else.

@PhilSwagielka

Sorry to hear this will affect you too, it's so scary isn't it? My tablets treat both my epilepsy (caused by a pretty catastrophic crash) and my existing bipolar. Your mental illness is just as valid as a "physical" one x

@PhilCornwall1 we posted at the same time - just reading your latest one now!

@PhilCornwall1

For one reason or another I can't get passionate and upset about all of this. I hear it on the news day in and day out and just switch off.

This is a really familiar feeling amongst my friends made in hospital - it's almost so shit it isn't worth wasting energy on because it feels futile when people refuse to even try to understand. I totally get it.

But days like today, when I haven't had a seizure (yet!), I feel all fired up so I will fight for myself AND you and others who will suffer in a No Deal situation x

Being a grown up is about accepting that people can hold different opinions to yours and not making sweeping statements or assumptions. In the interests of a happy marriage I'd suggest that you remind yourself of the reasons you decided you loved your partner and remember that they could just as easily have written this post about you in reverse. 😉

The irony is it is UNBELIEVABLY unintelligent and narrow minded to imagine that 17 million people, that's 17,000,000 people, all had the same reasons for voting leave and all of them negative. It's beyond absurd.

But it is quite noticeable that since then, people supporting leave haven't been able to put forward a serious case of why it is in the UK's interest to leave. The best argument I have seen is that if we don't leave, a lot of people will be upset. But it's not a case for Brexit in itself.

@ThatCurlyGirl and I thank you for that.

Two of the worst bigots I know voted remain.

When the matter of Brexit came up one time, I calmly explained my reasoning for voting leave to them. I was expecting reasoned counter-arguments. Instead, I was met with a torrent of abuse. When I suggested that we agree to disagree and just respect each others' POV, I was told they couldn't respect an idiot's opinion.

These are people who are openly racist and homophobic, so I really should have have expected their response, I suppose.

When the matter of Brexit came up one time, I calmly explained my reasoning for voting leave to them. I was expecting reasoned counter-arguments. Instead, I was met with a torrent of abuse. When I suggested that we agree to disagree and just respect each others' POV, I was told they couldn't respect an idiot's opinion.

What is the core of your reasoning for voting leave?