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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU? To want to start a serious relationship with a Man I met on holiday?

135 replies

Sadestevenson · 27/08/2019 01:10

I am a single mum of three all above the ages of 10 and I recently went to Morroco and met an amazing tour guide who spent most of the week taking us on excursions. We became good friends and had alot in common with each other. Since arriving back in the UK we stayed in contact and I have been developing feelings for him. Is it unreasonable to want to start a relationship with him? And if I did have a relationship with him what sort of expectations should i have?

OP posts:
user1473878824 · 27/08/2019 01:12

Sure. Fine. Seems totally fine.

user1473878824 · 27/08/2019 01:12

NO.

Sadiesnakes · 27/08/2019 01:13

Expect to be just one of many.

Tulipstar13 · 27/08/2019 01:13

I don't comment often, but to put it bluntly, don't do it. It will not end well.

colourlessgreenidea · 27/08/2019 01:17

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managedmis · 27/08/2019 01:21

Crack on

BritInUS1 · 27/08/2019 01:23

Crazy idea

MadameJosephine · 27/08/2019 01:24

Tread very carefully OP. One of my friends has been married for over 20 years to a Turkish guy who she met while he was working behind the bar in a holiday hotel so it’s not impossible but there are lots of barriers and possible problems.

TheQueef · 27/08/2019 01:27

Seems legit Hmm

HiJenny35 · 27/08/2019 01:31

Oh god no, you have kids to think about, you know nothing about this man, it's a holiday romance accept it as that. I've been a rep and believe me it will have been different women every week. Keep well clear.

justjuggling · 27/08/2019 01:35

I’d be so wary of that! Doesn’t seem a great idea, especially as a single mum of 3 kids.

OhioOhioOhio · 27/08/2019 01:45

No.

VladmirsPoutine · 27/08/2019 01:46

When he asks you to buy him a ticket to the UK get the hell out. Otherwise a pen pal isn't altogether a bad thing. However these stories don't usually have a happy ending.

Kiwiinkits · 27/08/2019 01:57

Ha this happened to my friend. Egyptian tour guide. What a cliche. Of course he was out to scam her. Thankfully she realises when he started laying on sob stories hinting at needing money.
Don’t do it.

Original poster
Sadestevenson · 27/08/2019 02:04

Well he hasn't asked for any money or a ticket to the UK yet but I deffo know what the warning signs are lol I will be out as soon as he does!.. tbh I think he just has experienced heart ache like myself and wants to feel loved. I will keep on chatting to him and see what happens.

OP posts:
ReanimatedSGB · 27/08/2019 02:08

It's not unreasonable to want a relationship with anyone, but they have the right to not want a relationship with you. Bear that in mind, OP...

TanteRose · 27/08/2019 02:26

how much is your annual income, OP?

you need £18,600 a year income, or savings of £62,500 to bring anyone from outside the EU into the UK.

Or would you be willing to move to Morocco to be with him?

JealousOrFair · 27/08/2019 02:27

Risk is too high. More likely than not this won’t end well for you.

I think there is a power imbalance, he desperately wants to be out of Morocco into Europe and you have everything he needs...

Don’t start a relationship like that. You need to be compatible when it comes to resources. Even if he has a crush on you, he probably also has a disabled mum who needs a heart surgery and can’t afford it, a sister who is in domestic violence relationship and can’t leave because she can’t find support and asked him for help, a job on the line, a degree that he wasn’t able to use due to saturated market....

His crush will be muddled by all of this and you will end up being used... understandably.

Bad idea.

Don’t lead him on. And don’t enable him to use you for his desperate needs.

Been there done that.

WereYouHareWhenIWasFox · 27/08/2019 02:55

yes, completely legit

Greeborising · 27/08/2019 02:58

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Greeborising · 27/08/2019 02:58

Please someone ask what that is!?

Greeborising · 27/08/2019 03:02

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littleduckeggblue · 27/08/2019 03:08

@Greeborising
Errrm ok then.
The thing OP is that there are people out there that will try and scam you, they aren't just going to ask you right now outright for a ticket to the UK. You'll fall in love with him and then it'll happen and boom you've fallen for it.
Personally if your wanting a pick me up and a bit of male attention then there's no harm in being penpals and friends on social media. Just don't get too attached

Greeborising · 27/08/2019 03:13

little I totally get your point but it’s such a cliche!
I’m sorry but I really cannot believe this post is real
Come on really
Eg 24 year old Egyptian barman falls head over heels in love with 52 year old woman from Leeds.

Greeborising · 27/08/2019 03:15

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