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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU? To want to start a serious relationship with a Man I met on holiday?

135 replies

Sadestevenson · 27/08/2019 01:10

I am a single mum of three all above the ages of 10 and I recently went to Morroco and met an amazing tour guide who spent most of the week taking us on excursions. We became good friends and had alot in common with each other. Since arriving back in the UK we stayed in contact and I have been developing feelings for him. Is it unreasonable to want to start a relationship with him? And if I did have a relationship with him what sort of expectations should i have?

OP posts:
avamiah · 27/08/2019 03:22

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IamWaggingBrenda · 27/08/2019 03:28

Well he hasn't asked for any money or a ticket to the UK yet but I deffo know what the warning signs are lol Yeah, I think you’ve already missed the warning signs. This is classic scam. Vulnerable, single parent, meets tour guide (let me guess, he’s younger than you are), and he’s going to tell you he’s falling in love, never felt like this before, etc. I’m sorry to be harsh, but he’s already playing you.

Greeborising · 27/08/2019 03:39

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Greeborising · 27/08/2019 03:43

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avamiah · 27/08/2019 03:45

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avamiah · 27/08/2019 03:57

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Ravenblack · 27/08/2019 04:02

Maybe the OP is busy skyping her sexy holiday rep? Grin She does sound smitten!

Not sure what the time is in Morocco? About 5am maybe? Not sure of the time difference.

ghostyslovesheets · 27/08/2019 04:28

🍿

msmith501 · 27/08/2019 05:14

Sounds like Shirley Valentine where Pauline Collins "makes fuck" with the owner of the taverna (played by Tom Conti) and decides not to go home on the plane but instead to stay with him.... and on arriving back at the bar, sees him chatting to the next woman in a long list ".. I er take you out on brother's boat, don't worry, it's just fishing. Fishing's fishing, fucking's fucking. It's er not the same thing...." etc.

PhilCornwall1 · 27/08/2019 05:25

Sounds a bad idea to me, since you've been home, he will have been like this with others, what could possibly go wrong.

DanielRicciardosSmile · 27/08/2019 05:36

Well, when if it all goes wrong, you can always get £200 from telling your story in Take a Break magazine, so there's always that.

LuluBellaBlue · 27/08/2019 05:41

Hi OP,
My mums cousin went on holiday to Tunisia 30+ years ago. Fell in love with a local waiter. Everyone said he wanted just wanted a passport / money.

They’re still very much in love, have 2 children in their late twenties and he’s only every been to England twice under protest! She lives a very happy life by the beach.

I’d say go for it, but with caution. But that’s with any new relationship you need to watch out for the red flags. Grin

Toneitdown · 27/08/2019 05:45

I'd say no, but then I'm not a believer in long distance relationships in general. I think that unless the goal is a happy family home together then there's not point in pursuing anything.

That's just my view though. I know some people who say they are happy doing long distance. Each to their own.

Jesaminecollins · 27/08/2019 05:45

@Sadestevenson

I wouldn't risk it because these men want a visa to the UK and by marrying him he will get one. Also they treat women differently and you would have restricted life with him and be expected to wait on him hand and foot.

WhoKnewBeefStew · 27/08/2019 05:50

I worked with a lady, late 40s who got involved with a 20 something Egyptian. He came to the UK, got married and are still married over 10 yrs later. Everyone thought she was bonkers. She's put up with a lot of stick over the years tho

I would never do it as it's got disaster written all over it. For the 1 that works there are 100s that don't

user1497997754 · 27/08/2019 05:51

I met someone on holiday in Kos only new him for 4 hours.....he was on holiday 2 from the UK and we have been married 13 years. If it was just you I would say def go for it but because there are children to consider I would tread very carefully. Keep chatting over the internet as see what develops. Good luck

Jesaminecollins · 27/08/2019 05:52

@WhoKnewBeefStew

She was one of the lucky ones. I wouldn't take a chance if it was me.

Jesaminecollins · 27/08/2019 05:53

I think it has a lot to do with age and if you are over fifty and some hot young guy takes a liking to you then I would be cautious. However if you are a similar age perhaps he is being genuine but I would be very careful.

ComeTheFuck0nBridget · 27/08/2019 05:56

What's the age gap between you?

Downunderduchess · 27/08/2019 06:19

Just no.

DanielRicciardosSmile · 27/08/2019 06:28

@Jesaminecollins God that's a depressing article. Even after all that she's married ANOTHER bloke from Tunisia.

Jesaminecollins · 27/08/2019 06:32

@DanielRiccardosSmile

I know, what a silly woman she is.

LellyMcKelly · 27/08/2019 06:33

H, I am a Nigerian prince and need to transfer £80 million dollars into your account immediately. Please send me your bank details.

Jesaminecollins · 27/08/2019 06:36

@LellyMcKelly

Here you are Mr Prince

bank sort code: !?-$$-££ and account number: %%!!**$$£££££££