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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Does anyone like their MIL?!

237 replies

cinnamoned · 22/08/2019 14:06

A bit lighthearted really, I get the impression that many people on here can’t stand their MILs and I was just thinking, if my DH thought those things about my mother, or didn’t want my mother to come for Christmas, I would be upset. So I suppose I always said I would be kind to my MIL from the get go.

AIBU to ask if anyone actually gets on with their MIL?

I do but then again, MIL, DHs Ex wife and I go on city breaks around Europe 2/3 times a year together so I’m quite odd Grin

OP posts:
CuriousaboutSamphire · 22/08/2019 14:09

Well, mine's dead now, but in life she was a bot of a trial... as she would cheerfully acknowledged.

DHs MIL is an absolute nightmare... there is little he can say about her that DSIS and I haven't already thought, or said out loud!

I have long suspected that there are only 2 kinds of people... those who get on with their parents when they reach adulthood and those who don't.

doskant · 22/08/2019 14:10

I don’t think you’re odd. I don’t like my MIL but that’s a direct result of her shitty behaviour. I’m an extremely tolerant person and really wanted it to be different but you can’t argue with asshole.

northernknickers · 22/08/2019 14:10

I did love mine...sadly her son was an arse and we got divorced 🤷‍♀️. I'd still be friends with her but sadly she died. Really special lady 💔. My Son in law loves me...but my DD doesn't get along with his mother.

ElleDubloo · 22/08/2019 14:10

Mine’s OK. She’s kind of sweet and nowhere near as annoying as she could be.We’re very different people and wouldn’t volunteer to spend time together, but wish each other well and occasionally help each other out.

LaLoba · 22/08/2019 14:11

I do! We don’t have that much in common, but we do have a mutual respect, and she gets me great, thoughtful presents. I enjoy her company far more than my own ‘D’M (who is the M, and MIL from hell, made it her life’s work to make all around her miserable).

PumpkinPie2016 · 22/08/2019 14:12

I love my MIL - lovely, funny and doesn't interfere.

Original poster
cinnamoned · 22/08/2019 14:12

@CuriousaboutSamphire GrinGrin Yes, I suppose so

OP posts:
Cryalot2 · 22/08/2019 14:13

Mine is dead, we had a love hate relationship. Mostly i got pn well with her , she was much older than my mum and we had some laughs over the years. I would love to put a couple here but am afraid of a certain newpaper.

doskant · 22/08/2019 14:14

@LaLoba That’s all it boils down to though, isn’t it. Mutual respect. If that isn’t there there is no chance, sadly.

MsRinky · 22/08/2019 14:15

Yes, she's lovely and she made my DH so I have a lot to thank her for.

AmIThough · 22/08/2019 14:15

I get on really well with my MIL, lovely lady! She'd do anything for anyone.

blackpinkinyourarea · 22/08/2019 14:16

Nope, she's unpleasant and very self obsessed. No interest in anybody else, is hard to please and very criticial (often wondered if she is a narc?) Luckily we only have to see her a few times a year..

Griefmonster · 22/08/2019 14:16

I love my MIL but she died almost 10 years ago. She was larger than life, loving, stylish, great cook, easy going, no judgement... I wish our DC could have known her first hand. We keep her with us through stories and photos and food. Celebrate her birthday every year. My DH misses her terribly x and remember millions of people will love their in laws but they don't go on to an internet forum to tell everyone!

Paperyfish · 22/08/2019 14:16

Mine’s completely lovely. I’m very lucky. In laws have taken the kids in holiday with them this year and i’ve Had a week off! Best mil ever!

Pepperwand · 22/08/2019 14:16

Mine is alright. Like a PP, we are very different people and don't have a lot in common but she is perfectly polite. Could be a lot better but also could be far worse!

AmateurSwami · 22/08/2019 14:18

Mine hates me because I took her precious son away from her test (I lie, she thinks breastfeeding is “disgusting and unnatural”) and forced him to impregnate me so I could steal all of his money. (He worked 1 day a week at Pizza Hut when we met)

AmateurSwami · 22/08/2019 14:18

*teat

DavetheCat2001 · 22/08/2019 14:18

I really like mine.. she's sparky and interesting, and jolly good fun to sink a bottle of wine with!

Original poster
cinnamoned · 22/08/2019 14:19

@blackpinkinyourarea That must be awful but before your DH met you, did he see her more often than a couple of times a year? Perhaps she’s resentful as she think you’ve somehow stolen her DS?

OP posts:
user1493413286 · 22/08/2019 14:20

I love my mil both as a person and as a mil and grandmother to my child but she drives me completely crazy at times. I think that’s families though

Criceta · 22/08/2019 14:20

My MIL and I are very different people, and she is one of those people who broadcasts to other people rather than having a two-way conversation, but she loves and helps out with our DS so we get on ok. I would never go on holiday with her again though, did that once and learned my lesson.

JoxerGoesToStuttgart · 22/08/2019 14:20

My MIL isnt really my MIL as exp and I were never married and together only briefly but we have children so she is their grandmother but I think of her as a MIL. We get on very well now. I only see her about once a month or so and I’m happy with that frequency. And very importantly we don’t discuss her son at all which I think is the key to us getting along. (He doesn’t see or support our DCs at all) Years ago we didn’t speak at all and I never thought I would but over the years we’ve both found some sense and realised the children fare better when we get along.

Gojojogogogo · 22/08/2019 14:20

I love mine to bits. We phone each other all the time and go out together without dh. She's 50 years older than me

kingsassassin · 22/08/2019 14:20

I like mine. Jolly good job as DD is exactly like her in looks, speech, interests, the lot.

chellochello · 22/08/2019 14:21

I love my MIL almost as much as my own mum - she's an amazing grandma to my kids and has been there for me even when me and DH have had problems.

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