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Original poster

To think no couple goes to bed at the same time?

462 replies

themimi · 04/08/2019 22:23

Watching a programme tonight with DH and saw another example of a couple lying in bed at night having a conversation after clearly retiring at the same time. Mentioned to DH that we never ever go to bed at the same time (I'm an early to bed early to rise person and he's the opposite). DH said that no couple does - it's just a plot device to facilitate dialogue. I think I agree and couples who go to bed at same time don't exist. Anyone out there (past honeymoon stage) who does?

OP posts:
Rezie · 05/08/2019 14:51

We do usually. Unless one of us is finishing up work late or the game goes on longer. But in general we do. I personally don't see this as a necessity but it's important to my bf.

AnastasiaVonBeaverhausen · 05/08/2019 14:55

We do usually. We don't go to sleep at the same time as I am a night owl and he's an early bird but I stay awake and read or watch my tablet whilst he snores like a rocket launch peacefully.

fussychica · 05/08/2019 14:56

Married 40 years. We almost always go to bed at around the same time. I'm usually in bed first while he watches the review of the papers on the news channel but he's usually in within 15 mins.

LBOCS2 · 05/08/2019 14:57

We do about 5 nights out of 7 - unless one of us is particularly tired or wants to stay up watching something or similar. Been together 10 years, so I think we're past the honeymoon phase!

nokidshere · 05/08/2019 14:58

We don't. I'm an owl and he's a lark. Not to mention that he sleeps in a suffocating environment.

stayathomer · 05/08/2019 14:59

Married 12 years and definitely don't!! I'm a morning person and he's a night owl. He has work to do at night and I alternate when I write. Add in one of us is generally up with one of the kids over the night so is running to bed!! We both take two nights off a week but even then I'm falling asleep or he is, our clocks totally don't match!! Most people I know one goes earlier than the other

Megan2018 · 05/08/2019 14:59

We go to bed at the same time generally, and we have separate rooms so we don’t need to! Occasionally one of us will go to bed earlier or later but we generally keep the same hours.

Mrsboombastic99 · 05/08/2019 15:04

My husband and I pretty much always go to bed at the same time. It would feel strange not to now.

Whatsyournameagain · 05/08/2019 15:09

Married 20 years, haven’t gone to bed at the same time for years! We used to in the early days but he’s a night owl and I go to bed a good couple of hours before he’s even tired. It got to the point where I got sick of hearing him lie there for hours on end fidgeting, tossing and turning and tutting and sighing. It works for us Grin

combatbarbie · 05/08/2019 15:13

We do majority of nights, i think it would be strange to actually not..... Thinking more on a sexual/emotional level.

RickJames · 05/08/2019 15:13

We do! My In-laws do everything together so that's influenced DH I think.
My parents did nothing together so I find it a bit funny, but it's nice also.
I think DH and I, in the future, will be one of those old couples who wear matching beige anoraks.

SunshineCake · 05/08/2019 15:19

99% of the time dh and I go to bed together. Somehow though he always ends up in the actual bed sooner than me. Grrr.

SunshineCake · 05/08/2019 15:21

Forgot to say married for 20 years and together 3.5 years before that. I can't sleep unless he's there.

Dragonglass · 05/08/2019 15:21

We have been married for 26 years and very rarely go to bed at the same time. I go up a couple of hours before Dh as I like to read in peace for a little while and I need more sleep than him.

It does seem as though some people have different ideas of what 'going to bed' means though. PPs have mentioned going to bed to drink tea, watch tv, do crosswords etc. To me these are not done in bed. We do things like this together downstairs and then I go up to read and sleep. DH does come up to give me a cuddle as well. There is no way I could sleep with the tv on in the bedroom or even dh on his phone.

luckygreeneyes · 05/08/2019 15:24

We do, unless I’m exhausted and go early or one of us is out

mikkyr · 05/08/2019 15:26

We have actually made it one of our 'marriage rules' - It gives us time to chat and it really good for your sex life if you are both awake at the same time and both asleep at the same time, it avoids all sorts of awkwardness if you know what I mean :)

imamearcat · 05/08/2019 15:32

We don't OP. But I've just been on hol with the fam and and all the other 3 couples did.

I find it a bit strange though because often one of them clearly wasn't ready for bed.

Love51 · 05/08/2019 15:35

We usually do, 16 years married. We did it less when the kids were very small, but I would have been happy to sleep at any point for a couple of years! Now they are older we are back to sleeping at the same time, unless life gets in the way.
It always seems to me that men stay up later than women? Why is that?

Love51 · 05/08/2019 15:37

Oh forgot to say our TV status. We only have one and it is downstairs. When the kids were small the sex was downstairs too, they could smell if I walked upstairs and sex hex us.

PooWillyBumBum · 05/08/2019 15:49

We always go to bed the same time. I thought everyone did.

My in laws have been married 35 years and do too (we stay over often).

PetaO · 05/08/2019 15:56

We always do, unless one of us is ill. It feels weird to go to bed at different times and I like the cuddles at the end of the day. I did the same with my late husband too.

Watchingthyme · 05/08/2019 15:56

@Love51

WTAF

Orangesox · 05/08/2019 15:59

Unless one of us is ill, we always go to bed at the same time now. For the first decade or so of our relationship I worked regular nights and we always made sure to go to bed at the same time when I wasn’t working; now I can’t sleep without the stupid arse being in bed next to me and I dread the sleepless nights on work trips Grin

stucknoue · 05/08/2019 15:59

Rarely.

hairyturkey · 05/08/2019 16:02

We always go to bed at the same time. I can count on one hand the times we haven't.