People who have never experienced being in family court

[SavanahXx]

It really does my head in when people side with social services. They have an opinion that "they are just doing what's best for the child". These people that have the opinion mostly have never even had involvement with SS, therefore don't see the lies and manipulation of a situation that they use.

It's easy for them to say that a parent 'could pose a risk' but do you know how hard it is to prove you wouldn't?

I seen an utterly revolting article that really baffled me. Social workers manage to get away with this stuff daily. Yet its not reported as it should be. This child was removed, with a judges permission. Then placed back with the mother by another judge.
There is so much corruption in our society and it needs to change.

www.google.com/amp/s/www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2018/06/13/social-worker-criticised-child-taken-away-mother-refused-give/amp/

@GirlRaisedInTheSouth so instead of challenging a sexual assault allegation that can easily be disproved, you'd let it stand? Not me.

In my friend's case, her DD's headmistress was contacted to be an expert witness. She told SS that DFriend was an excellent mother and they had absolutely no concerns about her parenting. The head was keen to give evidence to support my DFriend. SS told her that her evidence would no longer be required

That sounds about right. The solicitor acting for your friend should have called the Head teacher to give evidence supporting your friend. The fact he didn't speaks volumes.

I literally never get myself any 'treats' because my child is far more important.

Being a martyr and forbidding yourself from ever having anything nice doesn't make you a better motherit makes you someone who bases their entire life around their kid with no other source of happiness for no apparent reason.

The solicitor acting for your friend should have called the Head teacher to give evidence supporting your friend. The fact he didn't speaks volumes. Exactly. Hence the word corruption.

As false reports kept on coming, we were addressing each lie with supporting evidence and sending them to complaints dept. One night there was a hammering on the door. It was the police with "harassment notices with the power of arrest." The SW had alleged that the complaints were personal harassment. When the police saw all the paperwork on the kitchen table and copies of complaints they looked embarrassed and said we didn't need to sign the notices after all.Following day, we took the notices to a criminal law solicitor and he sorted it. Phone call came from the police, confirming it had been sorted and they apologised. We were worried that we now had a police record but they confirmed "no, your names have been completely wiped from the records." Next SS report arrives, there it was: Mr and Mrs X harassing SW, police visited with notices for power of arrest, continuing investigations.!!!! W T F? That meant yet another complaint. I'm assuming because we have no criminal records, they were trying to give us one. The most upsetting thing was, SS knew that if we had been arrested DD would be left alone (age 11) Zero consideration for her, fucking zilch! She was even upset at the police knocking and accusing us, never had the police round before.

Taco sigh.... Show a bit of empathy. OP has had two miscarriages and then new baby threatened to be removed, when she and DP had done absolutely NOTHING. Her DD will be even more than pfb. Give her a break!

@auntethel I can imagine you've been to hell and back bless you... Having to deal with that kind of hostility and refusal to back down over our kids, the most precious things in our lives must be terrifying. I was mercifully left alone after that call, thank god. But even as minor as my case was, I still worry when any of my kids have an unexplained bruise or that someone might make a malicious call and bring them into our lives again unnecessarily. Even though I'm sure most SW's are only trying to help, the couple of dodgy ones I've encountered (the one who spoke to me and another who caused an old friend some trouble) would be enough to put me off asking for any help should I ever need it one day. Just in case.

I also don't think it helps when Social. workers (or Teachers as per the last thread) get defensive when someone makes a thread complaining about some (some - not ALL) of them. I have the hugest respect for anyone who has a job that means safeguarding children might be necessary- most of them are hero's who only want the best for the kids in their care. I've sometimes thought about going into it myself even though I can see from the outside how hard it would As I said before, there are shitheads in EVERY profession, so when someone starts a thread about running into some of them, it doesn't mean that they are slagging off all people with that job title or denouncing the whole profession (although they might be a little wary when hanging on to their family is at stake). There's no point getting defensive or going on personal attacks. I currently work in retail - do I think that everyone who works in retail is good at customer service? Noooooope! I also used to work for the NHS and may well do so again soon; do I think that all of us who work in healthcare are earth angels?! No fucking way! And I wouldn't get the hump if someone started a thread slagging us "all" off either. People should be allowed to vent and share their experiences without being told they are wrong or paranoid by people who have experience of the job but not from the parent in question...

Exactly. Hence the word corruption

We get it! You think all parents who have SS involvement are all perfect parents who have been stitched up. Carry on with your warped way of thinking... Everyone's given up on you now.

@TacoLover children should be the centre of your universe. Sorry that mine is the centre of mine. And yours isn't. That's a shame.

I don’t spend all my money on my kids. It doesn’t make you love your kids more than I love mine, or make you a better parent Savanah.

TwoPups strange how swanfacade (post above yours) completely gets it but you don't.

Savanah when I said earlier that I'd had worse, I didn't mean your nasty cough and cold, I meant hecklers Btw, those posts have been removed

nicknackynuts weren't you one of the hecklers who were banned /suspended along with spero for goading me, a few years ago?

I’ve never been banned or suspended and I’m sure mumsnet can confirm that if need be. I have no idea what you are talking about but I’m guessing from your posting style you are no stranger to a run in with posters.

nicknacky so sorry got your name wrong. Ooops!

my friend, they told her that she could have yearly letterbox contact with her DD. However, if she appealed, they would stop all contact completely.

A competent solicitor (and you say she had one) would have been all over that. They would be making a massive fuss about the council trying to prevent access to justice, which is the sort of thing that judges disapprove of in a big way. They have had a lovely time pointing out to the SEN Tribunal that the LA seemed to have something to hide, and again I strongly suspect the tribunal would have lapped that up and been firmly on the parents' side; and they would probably have used it in evidence in any care proceedings.

Oh, my mistake nick.It was quite funny, hecklers were saying me in the red corner and spero in the blue. All got a bit out of hand, were you there?

I have absolutely no idea what you are on about.

They will only allow the documents that support their case. Anything that supports the parents will not be presented. Family Courts proceedings are similar to criminal proceedings, in that they will only present evidence that supports their case.

Sorry, but this is nonsense. Each side has exactly the same opportunity to present reports and evidence - whether it's a Family Court or a criminal court. Whilst it may well be the case that the LA won't present reports that are unfavourable to its case, it absolutely cannot stop the parents from filing them.

You can only appeal on certain grounds and SS burying evidence is not grounds for Appeal.

No, this is cast-iron grounds for appeal.

even if you could appeal, it would take years

No, it wouldn't. Cases involving children are fast-tracked.

I really am seriously concerned at the level of misinformation turning up on here which seems almost designed to put parents off from taking obvious steps to protect themselves. This is the sort of thing that John Hemming and Ian Joseph used to go in for, all in the cause of persuading people that they really should flee abroad with their children despite that being almost calculated to make people assume they were guilty. And I don't think that that is coincidental in any way.

The solicitor acting for your friend should have called the Head teacher to give evidence supporting your friend. The fact he didn't speaks volumes.

Exactly. Hence the word corruption.

Oh, FFS. Now it's not just a social services conspiracy, it's the solicitor as well. Why on earth would a solicitor working in this field whose reputation and future income depends on his results and on good reports from his clients suddenly decide that he'll help his clients' opponents?

To spell it out, the failure to call the witness will have been either because the solicitor was incompetent, or, more likely, because he discovered the headmistress wasn't saying what your friend thought she was going to say. It does unfortunately happen in these cases that people in the headmistress's position are reluctant to tell parents their real views, and that parents sometimes hear what they want to hear.

I have absolutely no idea what you are on about O...Kay....

auntethel, your friend's case must have been over 12 years ago if John Wright was the IPSEA director at the time - potentially even longer as he was active in the 1990s. It's a little disingenuous to present it as if it was relevant to the current situation.

ethel Remind me if you are so certain I was on some thread years ago? I can’t remember all threads I have been on. Not that it’s actually relevant to this thread though.........