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AIBU?

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Original poster

'Detained' at petrol station for not having my bank card

491 replies

Willowcat77 · 31/07/2019 07:39

Yesterday I stopped at my local village petrol station to refuel. I was on my way to pick up my DS for an important hospital appointment. I am a regular customer as it is the only petrol station/shop in the area and always get my car MOT'd there. My DP has been a customer/friend of the owners for over 20 years.

I went to the counter to pay but then realised that I'd left my bank card at home. The shop assistants knew me by sight so I said I'm really sorry but I'll need to go home to get my card, my house is only 5 minutes down the road. The assistant told me no, I would have to phone someone to pay for me and that I was forbidden to leave the premises!

I was very taken aback, but I phoned my DP. Unfortunately he wasn't answering his phone so I had to leave a voicemail. There was nobody else I could phone in the area. I was very worried about missing the hospital appointment, so I tried to reason with the shop assistants. I explained the situation and offered to leave my phone and £20 cash as security whilst I fetched my card. My petrol bill was £39. They knew I was local and my DP and I have spent 1000s of pounds there over the years.

They refused, saying if necessary I would have to stay there all day until my DP came to pay for me. They said this was "the rule". I wanted to speak to the owner but he wasn't in. I have ASD and am easily panicked. I was getting later and later for the hospital appointment and could feel I was having a proper ASD meltdown. I was getting so distressed I couldn't even redial my DPs number any more and had to ask them to do it. Eventually, after about 20 minutes, DP unexpectedly arrived and paid for me. I still feel very upset and that I can't ever go there again out of embarrassment.

My DP has since found out they did something similar to an older lady recently who was also local and a regular customer.

Aibu to feel I was treated badly and to make a complaint to the owner today? What were my rights in this situation? Could I have left to get the money?

OP posts:
user1493413286 · 31/07/2019 07:44

I saw this happen at Tesco and they had to fill in a form with all their details and essentially sign to say they would come back within a certain amount of time to pay it or there would be further consequences (not sure what).
I’m sure there must be some kind of process like this they follow as I know I wouldn’t have anyone who could drop everything to bring me money wherever I was.

ProudAS · 31/07/2019 07:45

It's despicable - you had every intention of paying. You also have ASD, goodness only knows what they were expecting to achieve by causing a meltdown.

lastqueenofscotland · 31/07/2019 07:45

Fuelling your car without checking you have a means to pay before hand is a criminal offence.
It was probably more than the staffs job was worth to let you leave the premises

TwistyTop · 31/07/2019 07:46

I think this is standard procedure in petrol stations. Sounds really shit though, especially when they know you

Iggly · 31/07/2019 07:47

They weren’t to know that the customer has ASD.
For all we know, the shop staff may have lost their jobs if someone didn’t pay for petrol. Maybe they’ve been stung before.

It’s a lesson in checking you’ve got payment before you fill up. I always check my purse before I go to the shops etc after once I left it in the car (lucky a supermarket so I could just leave the trolley for a minute).

Iltavilli · 31/07/2019 07:48

This has happened to me, but at a local station I rarely use. I was in a rush to a meeting, and they had no problem letting me go on the promise I’d return later that day to pay. I offered to leave a phone etc but they didn’t want it. I’d think you were poorly treated.

Lougle · 31/07/2019 07:48

They couldn't stop you leaving, could they? If they touch you they would be committing assault. I can understand that they were cross that you didn't check you could pay before you refueled, though.

Most petrol stations have a form available.

Longdistance · 31/07/2019 07:49

They wit have any customers left if they keep doing that. I would have just got in my car and driven off and got my bank card. I wonder if the owner knows what’s going on?

ScreamingValenta · 31/07/2019 07:50

What do they do if this happens to someone who doesn't have a partner or other family who could help them?

Venger · 31/07/2019 07:50

It seems harsh that they were so strict when they know you but theres probably a reason behind it such as multiple drive-offs (where someone leaves without even attempting to pay) or lots of people "forgetting" their cards and then not coming back to pay afterwards. That lost money has to come from somewhere and unfortunately in business if you're lenient about payment then you get taken advantage of. You're supposed to check that you have means to pay before you start filling up.

BottomliePotts · 31/07/2019 07:51

I think that given that you're a regular etc then yes you should complain.
I've had the same thing happen but wasn't panicked as I wasn't in a rush and I was unfamiliar to the staff so I had no problem waiting.
I do wonder what would have happened if you'd tried to leave

longearedbat · 31/07/2019 07:51

I did this once. Similar to you - local garage, regular customer. In my case, I left the car on the forecourt and walked home to get my card. They were quite happy with this. I'm surprised, seeing you live so close, they didn't give you this option. I thin they were being rather u.

BeckyWithTheSplitEnds · 31/07/2019 07:51

WTF? They have afaik ZERO rights to "detain" you - this isn't fucking Guantanamo!

I am shocked and I think you should get some real advice from CAB or a solicitor - and then I'd consider doing a sad face in a local newspaper.

It's beyond the pale - it's not as though you were an "unknown boy racer with giant chrome spoilers".

I once deliberately put a tenner in knowing I had no cash. It was about 25 years ago and I'd just left university and needed to get to a job interview... They had me fill in a form and I sent a cheque.

Venger · 31/07/2019 07:52

I saw this happen at Tesco and they had to fill in a form with all their details and essentially sign to say they would come back within a certain amount of time to pay it or there would be further consequences (not sure what).

They pass the driver details to the police and report it as a theft.

HugsAreMyDrugs · 31/07/2019 07:52

They should have just given you a form to fill in and told you to pay within a certain time frame.

itstimeforslime · 31/07/2019 07:52

I’m sure there will be folk along to tell you that YABU but I think YANBU in the slightest.

Common sense would dictate that you’d go and get the cash. They have your reg no at the very least. They could have had the police at your door by that evening if you didn’t return.

Total absence of common sense on the part of the staff member who could have called the owner and made him/her aware of situation.

We all forget things and make mistakes so if anyone crucifies you on her for it then I’d be making sure they’ve never forgotten their bank card/purse/phone/keys.

W1nnerW2nner · 31/07/2019 07:52

Lots of petrol stations have a sign at the pump that says -ensure that you have a method of payment before refueling

Hoppinggreen · 31/07/2019 07:52

Many years ago when I was a student and only carried cash I went to pay for £10 of petrol with my only £10 note. The cashier said it was counterfeit and wouldn’t take it, I didn’t have a phone so I had to fill in a form and promise to pay ASAP ( note was genuine it had just been washed).
I would have just left in your shoes OP if I wasn’t blocked in or anything they couldnt have stopped you and if they called the Police even if they turned up you would have been back by then
Sounds very upsetting for you, hope you are ok

itstimeforslime · 31/07/2019 07:53

And when I did pay I’d have done so in bloody coppers to spite them.

tiredteddy123 · 31/07/2019 07:54

They cannot legally detain you but if you had left technically they could have called the police.

I did the same at Tesco once, explained, filled in a form, went home got my card and went straight back to pay. No drama.

If I'd been in your situation I would have asked them to call the local police or non-emergency number where they would have been told to take your details and let you leave.

Theft is only where you intend not to pay/fail to pay. This was clearly not the scenario here.

Areyoufree · 31/07/2019 07:54

I've done this, and just filled out a form to say I would come back and pay. I love all the sanctimonious comments about how you're supposed to check that you have payment before you fill up though - because I always have my wallet on me, I just assume it's there. I don't explicitly check every time.

I think this is a bizarre rule, to be honest. And really unfair on the staff - what are they supposed to do if someone tries to leave? Physically detain them?

Skang · 31/07/2019 07:54

This isn't standard at all, you just have to fill out a form. I've never heard of this.

Were they particularly young or did they seem in general as if they didn't know what they were doing?

Lllot5 · 31/07/2019 07:55

I’d have walked out. What could they have done? Time they called the police and when / if they had got there you would’ve been back to pay.

Venger · 31/07/2019 07:55

I wonder if the station manager has issued new rules regarding drive-offs/forgotten bank cards and the staff member has misinterpreted them, especially if the manager has said something like no exceptions when in reality we all know that no exceptions does include some exceptions.

JemimaPuddlePeacock · 31/07/2019 07:55

YWBU not to have just driven off anyway and let them call the police if they thought it was necessary for you to be detained. So YABU to have gone along with it. I’d have laughed in surprise and said I would be back later. Happens to people all the time and police would have been incredulous to have been bothered by something like that!