To leave 7 year old

[HoorayItsTheHolidays]

Just seen another thread on v v similar lines, but I've just popped to the shop with my 5 year old and left my 7 year old at home playing the computer. (He didn't want to come, and he's been so good all day in the heat, and was happily playing his computer, I didn't want to drag him out).

I've never left him before. We checked what to do in most eventualities before I left (eg. Go out back door if there is a fire, don't answer the door if anyone rings the bell, call mummy if you are worried about anything....)

I was gone approx 10.34 minutes (I was glued to the clock!!) But was worrying for all of those minutes, and now trying to decide if what I did was really really wrong, or fine!

My 7 year old was absolutely fine when I got back. Still sitting at the computer in the same spot, and had barely realised I'd gone!

What do you think? Is 7 too young to be left alone?

I have a 10 and 7 yo. 7 year old has to go everywhere with me, even though the shop is literally 5 minutes away. Personally it's too young in my opinion.

Much too young.

Only 'much to young' Derbee for you and your child.

I think what you did was perfectly fine OP. You know YOUR child and his capabilities. I left my daughter for similar amounts of time at that age. However could never have done the same with my son. Completely different personalities, maturity and levels of common sense ..

I leave mine for 5 minutes to walk to the corner shop. She also walks to the corner shop herself. She's a very sensible child though - I know plenty of her friends who I wouldn't trust if they were my child.

Most 7yo's can understand how long you'll be gone for and what to do if you don't come back.

You know your child. Personally if there was a corner shop two doors down, then I would leave 7 year olf child at home for 5 minutes. A car journey would make me nervous, just in case there was an accident and delay.

I would and have. Talk also about answering the phone (what if you get delayed and want to call him to tell him) and change family members' display on the house phone to Mummy, Daddy, Gran etc rather than names.

@Derbee why much too young? The OP did it and it was fiNE.

Seems OK. I only started doing that when DD was about 9 I think, but I now leave her (11) and brother (nearly 8) for up to 20 mins if popping to local high street or supermarket round the corner

I wouldn't have left my older one at that age. My younger one would have been fine. As it was, he had an older sibling so didn't need to be left alone. Have been leaving him occasionally since about 8.5 though, as his older brother is out and about on his own now.

If he's sensible it's fine. I left my 8 year old daughter for 15 mins when she was off sick and I had to take my son to school.

10-15 mins is fine. We have a local shop 3 min walk away and school 5 min walk away I left my son from 7.5 if he was ill and I needed to take his brother to school or I need to get something quickly from the shop. I now usually send my 10 yo to the shop instead if it's just for bread/milk he loves the independence! (He wasn't left home alone until he was 9 - def think you chill more on subsequent children!)

Going by recent posts it seems acceptable on Mumsnet to let your 7 year old go to the park on their own but not leave them home. In my opinion 7 is too young for both.

If the shop is at the end of the road only a couple of minutes walk away I would say it's OK but I wouldnt want to drive somewhere. Not because I think he would be in danger leaving him for 10 minutes. But what if you had an accident on the way. No one would know you had a child alone at home

Too young in my opinion.
I didn't leave mine til age 10.
My DD will be 7 in a few months and no way would I leave her.

Seven is too young to be left home alone.

Not a chance I'd leave my 7 year old alone, and our shop is less than one minute by car. I think it's too young.

Seems like you had a plan, and depends on a child of course.

I was raised in a different country (to UK) and used to walk to school alone aged 7, and often come to an empty home after school. Giving independence to kids isn't a bad thing IMHO

I would expect a 7 year old to be fine for an hour or so!

We were routinely left from around 8 during the school hols so a quick shop trip I wouldn't even bat an eyelid!

Yabu and my parenting isn’t particularly strict. You are leaving his safety to chance and basing your decision on hope of nothing going wrong. Which no one can do. If it did, you could find yourself having a lot of explaining to do for leaving a 7 year old alone. Just take him with you. You’ve started a silly game now, where if he doesn’t want to go out, you have made it difficult for yourself.

@frogsoup

A little trepidation is expected, after all it's the first time. The feeling I get from the OP isn't that though, but worrying constantly whilst she was gone. I'm not convinced she thought he was ready to be left, and would be OK on his own. That for me is when it's on sticky ground, as that shows as a parent you don't judge your child to be mature enough, just that it was convenient to the parent to do so. If the OP (or anyone else) does feel her child is mature enough, and has made that judgement in the interests of their child, then that is assessing he will not come to harm and therefore in line with guidance.

I only left my children alone when I knew that we were all comfortable with it, and for my kids it was around age 10/11.

7 is much too young to be left alone in the house. If something happened it could be considered neglect and you would have to answer to it.

It's more about what could happen to you whilst you are out and no one would know your 7 year old is as home. I wouldn't take the risk if I was driving but if the shop was at the end of the road and I was walking, I probably would.
Talking to your child about what to do if you don't come back is all well and good but if 2 minutes into your trip, your child gets anxious it could turn into a really unnecessary drama. But looking at a clock and deciding on a time you will be home by is a good idea.
I remember my mum leaving me when I was 7/8 saying 'I won't be long' She would always be AGES chatting to people etc. I hated it and couldn't enjoy being at home whilst I worried about how long she would be.

I wouldn't leave a 12 year old at home alone but I am not in the UK. Has alot to do with childs personality I'm sure though? But 7 sounds awfully young.

Absolutely fine, had no choice but to do this in the past when I needed something urgently and it was snowing or DS was sick.

Nothing happened or even would have happened in those ten minutes, anyone who says otherwise is melodramatic at best.

Wtf at the serious car accident scenario 🤣🤣🤣 being left home alone is waaaaaay worse than death or life changing injuries resulting from a serious car accident. Obviously. 🙄 I think your fine op.