Small bedroom, bad mum?

[tashakg89]

So I've got a (small)three bed house and ever since I moved in there five years ago I've had horrendous anxiety over the little bedroom, it is 5'11 by 6'9, the second bedroom is fairly small too (9'10 by 7'9) although I'm ok with that size and is plenty big enough for my six year old. My four year old is in the tiny box room and I feel constant guilt and daily anxiety about it. I can't afford to move and won't be doing so for another 4-5 years but I just want to enjoy my house and I can't as I feel like everyone's laughing at me and thinking I'm a bad mum for putting him in a such small bedroom.
I'm constantly on Rightmove too comparing it to other box bedrooms and it really is the smallest one I've ever seen.

What do other people think? Does anyone else have children in tiny bedrooms?

I feel like everyone's laughing at me and thinking I'm a bad mum for putting him in a such small bedroom.

To be honest, seeing a kid in such a small bedroom wouldn’t bother me at all I would feel a more than concerned for you if I heard the above.

Are you ok in general OP? It is not exactly normal to worry so much about what people think to the point is causing you so much anxiety.

That room looks so cute OP! I have a 4 yr old and a almost-2 year old in a one bed flat with me and DP. It’s what we can afford. We all sleep in one room - I am a good mum and so are you!
As PP have said, I think making the space under the bed cosy/exciting is the way forward - so toy storage or a little reading nook?
Rehanging the door the other way would work a treat too (maybe with a little doorstop? My 4 yr old would wreck the wall with the door handle in no time!)

My 6ft 1 teenage son is in our box room. The loves it. He has a really good high sleeper with a desk and wardrobe under it. I don't feel guilty. He has everything he needs admittedly, maybe not everything he wants but he doesn't complain. Go easy on yourself.

My 6 year old DS has the biggest bedroom in the house (because we have the ensuite and DD is only here short term between uni). He begs to sleep in the spare room which is a box room with a load of bookshelves and the computer in it and a crap folding bed. Children are weird.

The size of your child’s bedroom doesn’t determine whether you are a good mum or not.

I’ve come across children who live in huge houses and have large bedrooms with an en suite and beautiful furniture and decoration and have parents who lavish them with every material thing going but spend little time with them and seem to be yelling at them for every little thing. Truly a small room is NOT something you need judge yourself harshly over.

Ps. It is true kids like smallspaces and that looks like a very nice tidy cosy bedroom.

My son will be leaving for uni soon and is still in the box room and refusing to be moved to the biggest bedroom, he prefers the cosyness of his.

Our 3rd bedroom is that size, my son slept in it until he was 6 then we had the loft converted but I know plenty of children who have slept in bedrooms that size,until they left home really it's nothing to worry about.

I spent my whole childhood sleeping in a box room!hardly any storage just room for a single bed and a tiny wardrobe (I am the only girl) didn’t do me any harm at all I swear
It was my own space my daughter had a box room too for 5 years and she says it didn’t affect her either
It is what it is

I live in a 2 bedroom flat, it has a 6'11 × 6' store room plus 2 massive bedrooms. Estate agents are marketing the same flats that have been bought from the council as 3 bedrooms & many families have converted the store room to a bedroom because it has a window & a radiator.

This might make you feel better op. This is our box room. It is home to 14yo dss!

All you can fit in it is a single bed (with storage underneath) and his tv is wallmounted.

Its fine, at 4 its a room for sleeping and small rooms can be lovely and cosy. Please stop feeling guilty over it there is just no need.

Rug on the floor under the bed. Maybe a bean bag type seat so he can sit under there. I’d look at opening the door the other way as well.

My sister was in a similarly sized bedroom until I went to university (and she was 15!) You could literally get a small single bed in it and that was it. My parents still live in that house (in fact, that’s the cats room now 😂) but it’s not harmed my sister in any way and my parents certainly never displayed any guilt over it. It is what it is. We live in London too so moving was always pie in the sky, even back in the 80s and 90s.

My DH had a box room that size growing up- he left home at 23 (he was 6'4 btw) so I don't see a problem.
You can create more living space for him as he gets older by having a high sleeper bed with a desk /storage underneath.

We have a big house with 4 bedrooms, 2 sitting rooms etc. DS is in the box room, his sisters share a room (and are jealous of his cabin bed with desk and bookshelf). He loves his room. Never thought to feel bad that a) my DDs share or b) DS has a boxroom. They are very fortunate in many ways.

I had an unplanned pregnancy and not enough space. I have 3 on a triple bunk bed in a small room. They love it!

I know what you mean about it not feeling like a big enough space, as an adult I think I can’t make a child sleep in there when the other child has a bigger room, but actually I had the box room as a teen and I loved it, it was specially decorated how I wanted it and it was better than sharing!

I'm another one with DD in a box room. She loves it. It's not unusual to have a child in a small bedroom. They can be lovely and cosy with a bit of planning and configuration.

You could put both kids in the big room. You take the middle one and use the small one as a play room as another option.

My ds3 is in the box room. We have a larger bedroom but have a lot of guests (family) so need the space. He loves his little room and will probably stay there until he starts seniors.

A few small things to make it cozy - we have fairy lights weaved around the wood on the bed. A small fluffy rug.
Pick a restful colour scheme, but theres no need to be a slave to colour scheme. My girls have a matching duvet and curtain set which is mainly white but has lots of pale green trees and cute pink details. I try to buy/make to match the green as I hope its restful. Green mural sticker for wall and made some green and pink bunting to hang in the white spaces.
Try not to buy stuff unless you can picture a space for it. I have been guilty of seeing something that is cute, and then struggling to find a place for it.
Do a trip round ikea either without the kids or with someone else watching them so you can really look at the ideas and see if any will work in the space. I've lost count the number of times I've been there but I've just wandered aimlessly, herding the kids and not really making the most of it!!!

It's not a problem. It is not unusual for children to have a small box room. Like others have said, kids value their spa e more than sharing. However, if it bothers you that much why not consider taking the wall that separates both kids rooms down (assuming they are next together and it is not load bearing). Make one bigger room for both kids. May affect the resale price of your house though as you go from three to two but at least you may feel better. Alternatively, a loft conversion? I know you said there's no money to move, but would this be possible? You could go in the loft and the kids could take the large and mid sized bedrooms?

@tashakg89

How about a Murphy bed?

@OneRingToRuleThemAll
@Clockworkprincess
thanks for the pics! Both them bedrooms look so cute and cozy and look similar size to mine!

To those who mentioned turning door so it opens outside I've mentioned this a few times in past to oh and he isn't having any of it. No idea why, he won't even discuss it.

@Mummyshark2019

we had a quote to get a loft conversion and it was 26k! it's because it was built in early 90s and something to do with the loft beams. We had a few quotes and all said it wasn't worth it and we would never get our money back.
Unfortunately we can't extend to side either as not enough space. I'd absolute love a loft conversion too!! If we ever do move defiantly getting a house with one!