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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Are they just shit parents?

170 replies

Peggytheunicorn · 09/07/2019 18:19

I am fully prepared to be told I BU
But I have to ask DH nephew is 25 his gf is 23
Both are lazy AF
They live with MIL & FIL
They have an 8 month old DS that came from a one night stand and nobody has questioned the child’s paternity not that it is important to me.
But these two are lazy
They stay in bed till midday Whilst MIL looks after baby they go for weekends away and such whilst baby is with MIL.

I just think that it’s wrong they never ever have their own child ever.

The baby’s mum is so lazy she sleeps in every day when I ask mil why she allows it, she simply says
“Because they are young”
Wtf
I was 17 and raising my twin DS alone in my own flat at that age!
Am I being horrible or am I right in thinking this is not great?

OP posts:
howwudufeel · 09/07/2019 20:35

Parent posts on a parenting site about parenting and asks other parents their views on said parenting. Gets roasted for posting about parenting on a parenting site and for asking other parents about said parenting Hmm

bingbongnoise · 09/07/2019 20:35

@Peggytheunicorn

yes I was the majority of the time whilst he worked 12 hour shifts plus over time. Wow I am genuinely shocked at how horrible some of you are about MY situation. When I’m asking for views on a separate situation!*

Go the sisterhood here. 😂

Makes me wonder are the ones being shitty to me or about me the ones that emulate the nephew. 🤔

LOL, the irony in this post!

Not much 'supporting the sisterhood' from you, for this woman he is living with eh???

Dishing out bile and spite in abundance, but can't take a taste of your own medicine back.

As a pp said, what was the point in posting this thread?

Just so you could mock and jeer at your nephew and his girlfriend, and say the baby is probably not his anyway, in the hope that most people would agree, and you could get people to join in with the spitefest???

Epic fail.

And as @PancakeAndKeith said, are all the girlies on here meant to back you up, JUST BECAUSE we are also female??? Jog on mate. Wink

Your whole demeanour on this thread, and the way you speak about your own FAMILY, and the way you mock and deride people on here (saying anyone who is disagreeing you probably lives like your nephew and his girlfriend,') shows me you are NOT posting all this out of concern. Just pure spite.

Dieu · 09/07/2019 20:37

YANBU. On MN currently there is a thread about a woman who doesn't want to join her sister on a camping trip, as she is bringing her sister in law's 2 kids with her (not a big deal in my eyes, but hey ho). The thread is full of 'lazy SIL' comments, and telling the OP she shouldn't go!
And yet on this thread, YABU! MN truly is baffling sometimes. And of course they're lazy parents, and pandering to them will do no good at all.

sweeneytoddsrazor · 09/07/2019 20:40

The OP could have posted at a different time and got thoughtful, considered responses about her concerns. It's the luck of the draw.

I think the tone of the OP has more to do with the responses tbh. Had the OP put I think my DN and his GF are taking advantage of my in laws regarding childcare then I am sure the responses would have been a lot kinder than tget are in response to a far more judgemental approach
OP you haven't answered my question as to where your DNs parents are in all this?

Rainonmyguitar · 09/07/2019 20:54

I think the tone of the OP has more to do with the responses tbh. Had the OP put I think my DN and his GF are taking advantage of my in laws regarding childcare then I am sure the responses would have been a lot kinder

You really need it spelling out to you? You weren't able to work that out for yourself? Of course they're taking advantage of the inlaws...it's all there in the OP!

PrincessC0nsuela · 09/07/2019 21:03

Wow what a bunch of nasty nasty comments. Keyboard warriors at their finest. You say the OP is judging people and then you judge HER situation?? As a PP said, if you see a post you don't like, scroll on by. The only reason this thread has become so horrible is because of the awful things some of you are saying. Shame.

Flaskfan · 09/07/2019 21:07

Ghostylovesheets yes! Twins have been a mn red flag for a long timeGrin

Sorryisntgoodenough · 09/07/2019 21:07

They stay in bed till midday Whilst MIL looks after baby they go for weekends away and such whilst baby is with MIL

Foolish of MIL to allow them to do that and take on the role of parenting their child....BUT if she is happy to to it, with no health issues, that is her choice. Crap parentage with not actually wanting to parent their own child though.

Sorryisntgoodenough · 09/07/2019 21:08

#parenting

MNHQ
SophieLMumsnet · 09/07/2019 21:15

We don't think the OP's coming back, so we're going to take the thread down

bingbongnoise · 09/07/2019 21:17

@PrincessC0nsuela

Wow what a bunch of nasty nasty comments. Keyboard warriors at their finest. You say the OP is judging people and then you judge HER situation?? As a PP said, if you see a post you don't like, scroll on by. The only reason this thread has become so horrible is because of the awful things some of you are saying. Shame.

Did you mean to click onto netmums hun?

Agree with @sweeneytoddsrazor the tone of the OP's posts has resulted in the responses she has had. She has had a mocking, deriding tone since she started the thread. About he own family, AND towards some posters who had the TEMERITY to disagree with her!

You wanna go tell someone off for being 'nasty nasty nasty keyboard warriors???' Go direct your comments to @Peggytheunicorn

NoSauce · 09/07/2019 21:19

Is the OP a troll Sophie?

PrincessC0nsuela · 09/07/2019 21:19

@bingbongnoise
Wind your neck in

PancakeAndKeith · 09/07/2019 21:21

Wow what a bunch of nasty nasty comments. Keyboard warriors at their finest.

And the op is so much better.
She’s not asking ‘how can I support my MIL?’ Or ‘MIL is asking for advice, what can I say’.
No. She is just hanging over the figurative back fence telling us the gossip.

OldIrishTERF · 09/07/2019 21:21

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

OKBobble · 09/07/2019 21:21

I am intrigued by a one night stand that appears to have lasted at least 18 months now.

bingbongnoise · 09/07/2019 21:21

That's a bit unusual isn't it, deleting a thread 'because the OP does not appear to be coming back....' She only posted 2 hours ago...

Wonder why mumsnet think the OP is not coming back ? Confused

PrincessC0nsuela · 09/07/2019 21:22

@PancakeAndKeith and most MN posts are different from that??

bingbongnoise · 09/07/2019 21:22

@PrincessC0nsuela

ODFOD.

PancakeAndKeith · 09/07/2019 21:23

and most MN posts are different from that??

Yes.

PrincessC0nsuela · 09/07/2019 21:25

I don't know which ones you've been reading then @PancakeAndKeith

MrsMiggins37 · 09/07/2019 21:25

YANBU

why has your nephew saddled himself living with his mother and someone else’s kid? What a mug.

They do indeed sound lazy and lacking in any sort of life ambition

Ginger1982 · 09/07/2019 21:32

@SophieLMumsnet why are you deleting it? It's hardly been any time.

GimmieTheCoffeeAndNooneDies · 09/07/2019 21:40

Of the op isn't a troll I'll eat my socks (see what I did there).

nanbread · 09/07/2019 21:42

@Sallyseagull the OP refers to her "elderly in laws" in a subsequent post.

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