You don't just chill with a young baby ?

[dontfollowmeimlosttoo]

Was asked by a relative
Person : what you up to tonight ? Just chilling?

Seriously do people think babies are easy . What am I gonna be doing other than feeding changing bathing , keeping baby alive and to bed. Baby is 3 months old.

Got me thinking are other people out there with young babies still having evenings and doing stuff , maybe Iv got it wrong 🤷‍♀️

When dd was small shed be in her moses basket and I would chill watching tv while she was sleeping.

Baby is 4 months old no idea why I put 3

It depends on lots of things really, some babies at three months go down to sleep and stay down until the morning. When mine started that, I most certainly chilled in front of the TV/read a book/shared a bottle of wine with DH. If your baby is still up until all hours/up and down throughout the night, then of course you won’t get the same chance to relax. I’m guessing it’s the latter case with yours-don’t worry, you will get your evenings back sometime though!

Are you offended? That's exactly what we did in the evenings when the DCs were babies. Once they were down for a while that was chill time.

Sorry YABU. Unless you’re going out or have active plans, then that is ‘chilling’ with the baby.

Also, not to be one of those mums, but nappy changes and feeding might be tedious and never ending but it’s not exactly hard is it?! I used to have mine in a moses in the living room while I watched tv and ate my dinner.

I used to chill and binge netflix/eat biscuits for the hours he napped on me.

DD started sleeping through at 4 weeks. We never really went out much before so our lives have changed very little

Depends on the kind of person you are. I never felt chilled with a newborn. Felt anxious, trapped, miserable, burdened, bored and lonely.

Now he's 2...yeah we can chill! And we do.

Wait until they’re a toddler! Turns out that this part is indeed chilling.....

I never chilled with DS1. too convinced I was going to accidentally kill him at any moment. also I never knew how long he'd be asleep for - would I get to cook a meal and eat it? who knew. I hated that, not relaxing at all.

by the time I had DS2 I was reasonably certain I could keep him alive, so relaxed a bit

but YANBU I think OP. not much about having a young baby is relaxing, especially in this heat

so

No not offended , I just thought as I missing something here because I never feel my evenings are chilled lol. Also found it a little strange to be asked what are you up to tonight ? I don't see how I would be up to anything other than looking after the baby 😂

At 3 months old, mine were asleep by 7pn, so yes, I would spend my evenings chilling out, watching TV with DH etc.

It very much depends on the baby. Mine slept most of the time at that age, so there was time to chill.

Mine used to feed and sleep mainly at that age, so yes I guess I was chilling a lot, watching crap tv in the middle of the night, eating cake etc. While cuddling the baby , obviously. In fact I did very little other than feed the baby.

Sorry that should say I never feel my evenings are chilled I wouldn't use that phrase.

You seem to have turned a completely innocent comment, into a dig about you and your parenting.

I'm not sure what you are offended about?

I would assume it was a nice way of saying that you are just staying in as you have a baby so unlikely to be out till the early hours drinking (although some people do and that's totally fine).
She probably said it to avoid asking what your plans were and making you feel bad if you didn't have any!

You can't win with some people!

@Needcoffeecoffeecoffee no she said to me " what are you up to tonight ?" I then paused and said erm just and she cut in and said " just chilling ?" . I paused as didn't know what to say as I honestly don't make evening plans now I have a baby

No @IceRebel I am not offended or taking it as a dig I'm asking if people with young babies still make plans go out etc . As when I was asked the question I thought oh should I still be making plans

It was actually a bloke that asked me

Sounds like she was just being nice and saying 'just chilling' as in staying at home rather than going out.

It seems a total non issue unless I have missed a whole back story

no I do get the OP

when I had my first baby the idea that I was spending any time chilling would have left me completely . I was constantly in a state of high alert! I unclenched when he reached about three and then had another baby!

*he then.
I really just think it was small talk nothing to over think

But I do get what it can be like with a new baby in that everyone seems to be making a comment and you always feel you should be doing something whether it's baby classes, signing, organic weaning, second language, entertaining them educationally every second.

Thanks for understanding @BernardBlacksWineIcelolly I just thought to myself well I wouldn't call this chilling but ok lol.

I also thought am I supposed to carry on making plans then 😂