You don't just chill with a young baby ?

[dontfollowmeimlosttoo]

Was asked by a relative
Person : what you up to tonight ? Just chilling?

Seriously do people think babies are easy . What am I gonna be doing other than feeding changing bathing , keeping baby alive and to bed. Baby is 3 months old.

Got me thinking are other people out there with young babies still having evenings and doing stuff , maybe Iv got it wrong 🤷‍♀️

Anyone who goes out to eat in the evening should be made to sign a declaration on reaching their destination that they are very quiet, won’t take up extra space, will leave if their voice rises about 10 decibels
Suits me!!🤣🤣🤣🤣

We used to take our babies into a restaurant in their car seats, OP, it was like a little rocking chair (not sure if they still make that kind though).
Keeping baby alive. I didn't understand that bit - is your baby poorly?. If not, I don't think you actively have to keep them alive, other than feeding them, making sure they are safe, obviously checking on them,etc.

For the love of god OP DO NOT TAKE YOUR BABY TO RESTAURANTS IN THE EVENING

why ever not? I even taken toddlers and primary school kids. They are better behaved than some adults shrieking and laughing at the top of their voice.

You could have Family/Friends to visit or they visit you.

You could be going late night shopping.

You could be gardening etc.

I've babysat babies, outside of the family and my Grandchildren, from a few weeks old, so some people do still make plans.

To be honest, the person asking probably didn’t really care and was just making small talk.

I have to say that the last time my son was able to sleep next to us or in a sling in a restaurant was at about 3mo. A couple of weeks later it was far too noisy and disruptive for him. I felt lucky to have a fairly settled baby in the evenings - he would only sleep when on one of us but he did actually sleep. I just didn’t expect my experience to be universal

I usually refer to staying in with no particular plans as 'just chilling'. It doesn't mean doing nothing, just means doing nothing in particular.

Examples of not 'just chilling': people coming round, have some housework to do, thought I'd catch up on a box set etc etc etc - they're all plans in a sense

I used to go out when DD was a few weeks old & leave her with DH who was very capable. Nothing wild but still used to see friends.
Used to have 7pm bedtime & evening was free after that time.
Back at work when she was 4 months & had to do marking/planning in the evening so not exactly chilling.
Did bottle feed though which makes it easier to switch off as someone else can take over.

Good for you @Ponoka7 obviously the babies you looked after didn't need breastfeeding then

dontfollowmeimlosttoo, a lot (most babies) aren't, and many of those that are take a bottle sometimes.

But anyway, breastfeeding is a choice, and if a woman chooses it, implicit in that is that it might impact on her social life (unless she takes babe with her). I say this as a breastfeeding mother right now. Those who bottle feed or combi feed have more freedom to resume their social lives. Equally, they generally need a bigger bag when they go out with baby. Swings and roundabouts.

Would be nice to go back to the evenings chilling with a baby. Mine are 10 + now so evening with them last untill I go to bed mostly. The baby stage is definitely the stage you can chill so make the most of it.

@dontfollowmeImlosttoo why would breastfeeding stop someone going out for a few hours? Not everyone cluster feeds (I'm not entirely sure what it is but I assume it is kind of almost continuously feeding for very short periods?). I breastfeed both mine, DS1 would go 3-4 hours and DS2 2-3 hours from very little. I expressed a small amount in a bottle for emergencies but generally we didn't go out too far. Under 4 weeks I found the babies very portable, then once in better routines I knew how long I could go out for without it being an issue.

I am not saying the above to be unkind but I find it odd you can't see how others can do it. It's not an issue how you do it of course but no need to judge what others do.

Good for you Ponoka7 obviously the babies you looked after didn't need breastfeeding then

That's a bit rude OP. I could happily leave my breastfed babies for a few hours once they were a few months old. They all took expressed milk well and it was important to me to have some time to myself occasionally.

For someone who is so quick to take offence at a passing remark you seem perfectly happy to be fairly rude to others.

Yeah man you ain't chilling with a three month old

How quickly people forget!

^ ffs, I have a three month old. I chill.

@managedmis I know exactly . Before I had a baby I chilled , I would never use the word " chilling " to describe looking after a baby . I enjoy it it's lovely but it's not chilling .

Some people choose to breastfeed on demand. It does sometimes mean that the babies can't just be left for a few hours. Other choose not to express. I also have a three month old, but she just come out with me (within reason).

Let me correct myself 'sometimes mean that some babies can't just be left for a few hours'.

I've been doing that a lot today.

DD is 16 now but at 4 months after eating I'd style with her in a pile of cushions ,pop her onto feed and watch TV with ExH or just chat.At 9pm he'd pour me a glass of wine.DdAnd I had got the hang of the feeding malarcy and I would leave her there till she slept.She had a last feed at 11 and then I was clear until 5am.
We did have a few days/nights out and DD had been to 2 beer festivals by 5months.
Her rubbishtimeeas when I cooked and tried to eat In the evening when we would end up relay eating.
I never did the night time bath,I bathed her in a big sink in the mornings after she had been in a wet nappy all night.

My baby at that age went to bed at 7pm with a dream feed at 10.30pm so we did a lot of chilling!