To expect a nanny/babysitter

[PinkGlitter123]

To entertain an 8 yr old boy and not just let him listen to music, read and play Lego by himself the whole time? This is all after school.

Nanny or babysitter?

There's a difference in expectations.

No, I wouldn't expect an 8 yr old to need entertaining. And if you do entertain them, you're doing them a disservice.

Pretty poor! Unless FT nanny and DC is supertired or something.

We had a nanny until recently. After school my similar aged Dc didn’t want entertaining, they want free time to play themselves and relax. She’d ensure homework was done etc and host play dates but wouldn’t actively play with them. I didn’t expect her to as I let them decompress after school.

Who is this person?
What are you paying them?
What does the child want to do after school?

Babysitter I would expect kids to do whatever they liked (within reason) as a treat.
Nanny I would expect more structured activity.

Isn't chilling out with individual down time that doesn't include a screen, perfect for an 8yo? I would have thought it was.

He's had a full day at school. He doesn't need entertaining by an adult. He needs to relax and have unstructured free time.

A babysitter I hire.
£10 an hour
All child wants to do is the above which I mentioned. This then leaves sitter with nothing to do.

Do kids need structured activity at home after school? Surely they go to the odd club if they’re in one and apart from that it’s just ensuring their homework is done and they’re fed and hygienic?

Everyone needs down time.

Sounds perfect for the DC.

A way to unwind after school by choosing what makes you happy, whilst being supervised by an adult.

Win win.

Where can I hire?

I wouldn't expect them to be entertaining an 8yo!

This then leaves sitter with nothing to do

Apart from ensuring DC is safe, secure & happy.

I would not expect a babysitter to entertain an eight year old, no.

Surely that is what babysitters do...look after not entertain?

She's a sitter - she's supervising your child and making sure he's safe.

What else should she do?

• make him a snack
• supervise homework

YABU. Sitter is being laid to be in your home and make sure it doesn't go up in flames and that your child doesn't do anything stupid. It's only a couple hours after school, what do you want? They time is what costs. For a younger child I'd expect engagement, but not at 8

So your DC is happy and occupied? And the babysitter is adequately supervising? Then I'd say you are getting what you've paid for.

A nanny is different.

The babysitter isn't left with nothing to do. She's babysitting.

If it’s an unqualified babysitter who you’re paying on an adhoc basis all I would expect is that they’re watching the child and maybe making a few snacks. I wouldn’t expect them to be helping with homework or devising activities without a lot of guidance from you. I would expect them to interact with the child but not to fully entertain the child, I’d expect simple activities such as TV, iPad or toys. When I used to babysit half the time the kids were asleep anyway and I’d mostly be being paid to watch TV.

If it’s a qualified nanny who you employ full time then I would be expecting more such as helping with homework, planning some in-house activities (cooking, arts and crafts etc) and sometimes taking out after school. I would expect a full time qualified nanny to be doing more with the child than a babysitter.

Sounds like she is entertsining him, by letting him be indepentant.

Most 8 year olds actually want time alone to play no?

Babysitters don’t necessarily have to ‘do’ anything - if your child is occupying themselves and has a suitable adult at home to keep them safe and deal with anything that they want/need help with, what’s the issue?

I used to babysit at night sometimes and the kids would already be reading in bed and would stay in their rooms until lights out. I wasn’t actively ‘doing’ but was being paid for my time staying to keep watch and help them if needed. Job done.

All child wants to do is the above which I mentioned. This then leaves sitter with nothing to do.

Well, if she's so extraneous you can just let her go and leave him by himself, eh?

A babysitter does not need to be entertaining an 8yo after school. She's there keeping him safe. Don't make her do something that actually isn't right or healthy for him from some misguided idea of "getting your money's worth".

When I was younger I got paid £5 an hour to babysit for a day a week. I begrudged the fact that I was expected to be a play mate for their 7yo in this time as that is not the expectation of a babysitter. They also had a baby.

At the time I didn't mind £5 an hour as I needed the money quite frankly, but on reflection it was very little. And they never came home when they said they would.

Good grief.

On your logic, the babysitter might just as well not be there at all.

Sack her, OP. Save yourself the ten quid an hour you're paying her.

Let your DC look after himself.

Why would you want your babysitter to do anything if your ds is happy doing what he's doing? Surely that's all that matters.
For an 8 yo an adult just needs to be there for food and in case anything goes wrong.