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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect a nanny/babysitter

133 replies

PinkGlitter123 · 03/07/2019 21:31

To entertain an 8 yr old boy and not just let him listen to music, read and play Lego by himself the whole time? This is all after school.

OP posts:
Original poster
PinkGlitter123 · 03/07/2019 21:46

She does all that but inbetween there is nothing more she can do.

OP posts:
Riceandthings · 03/07/2019 21:49

She could read, watch t.v, draw, write, knit etc?

Ivestoppedreadingthenews · 03/07/2019 21:49

I’m not sure what the problem is? Child is safe and happy. Isn’t that the point of hiring someone?

ANutAsBigAsABoulder · 03/07/2019 21:49

But as a babysitter she’s doing exactly what you’re paying her for.

HungryForSnacks · 03/07/2019 21:50

You sound disgruntled that you're not getting your money's worth!

The arrangement sounds fine to me. Kid is safe and happy. What's the issue exactly?

AbbyHammond · 03/07/2019 21:50

A babysitter is there basically in case of emergency, aren't they? Ensure the child is safe and provide food as needed.

MirrorHope · 03/07/2019 21:51

What do you want from her? My kids do that play with their toys , do their homework watch telly. I don't really play with them.

fedup21 · 03/07/2019 21:56

I can’t actually see what the poor babysitter has done wrong?!

Lazypuppy · 03/07/2019 21:58

Babysitter - YABU. they aren't there to entertain your child. They are there to supervise and look after your child.

Excited101 · 03/07/2019 22:03

You’re being ridiculous. Your child does not need or want micromanaging, give the kid a break. You’re paying the babysitter to take care of your child, he’s been in education all day. Babysitter can be about, help him if he needs it, be there to make sure nothing bad happens and play if he wants to. Sorry you don’t feel like you’re getting your moneys worth...

nicecuppaforme · 03/07/2019 22:03

????? YABU !!!!!

nicecuppaforme · 03/07/2019 22:04

Can I add though that your kid sounds great getting on with those (healthy) activities and not whining for a tablet or computer games.

SirGawain · 03/07/2019 22:06

This then leaves sitter with nothing to do.
Really, what about keeping your child safe and fed?
A nanny is a professional whose job is to be a surrogate parent while you are unavailable. A babysitter is simply someone who keeps an eye on your child in an informal way.

dillusionaldog · 03/07/2019 22:14

OP imagine if you got home from a long day at work and there was some older lady in your dining room waving a tube of pritt stick, finger paints and a board game at you. every day.

fair enough if he WANTS to play but otherwise just leave him alone to relax in peace.

and if its the "what am i paying her for" aspect, why not hire a babysitter that does ironing or light jobs too.

Isatis · 03/07/2019 22:15

You’re paying the going rate for a babysitter, she’s doing what is expected from babysitters for 8 year olds. If you expect more you’ll need to pay quite a lot more.

DustOffYourHighestHopes · 03/07/2019 22:16

I remember our nanny in the holidays getting really angry that we weren’t eg playground board games. We just wanted to sit on the sofa and talk or stare into space. Chill out etc.

kw1091 · 03/07/2019 22:17

So what do you want her to do?

BarbedBloom · 03/07/2019 22:20

What exactly are you wanting her to do? I babysat for years and sometimes we would do activities, but mostly they just wanted to do their own thing while I made sure they had food and didn't set anything on fire

Missingstreetlife · 03/07/2019 22:23

If he has friends that go to the park, or some activity she could take him. Free play important fir developing their minds. If he's bored she should be available to play but sounds like they are ok

Original poster
PinkGlitter123 · 03/07/2019 22:24

What do you mean DustOffYourHighestHopes?
Babysitter does take child to the park when its nice weather and allows friends to come in (We live down the same road as a few of them). I guess I am expecting too much and can't be expected to force child into playing games in the way you would a 5-6 year old. I have to be okay with her sitting and reading I know. As for the tablets/computers, mine always asks for them but we have a weekend only rule so he doesn't get to do that when the sitter is there.

OP posts:
VivienneHolt · 03/07/2019 22:25

£10 is a babysitter wage not a nanny wage imo so I think you’re getting what you pay for, and in any event it sounds like the child is happy and chilling out after a busy school day so I don’t really see the issue.

CoconutMango · 03/07/2019 22:27

I think it sounds a perfect way to unwind after school. Lego and reading! Fab!

I'd relax the weekend only for screens rule too.

Not sure what you're expecting for £10aaa

Rtmhwales · 03/07/2019 22:31

Could you ask her to meal prep or maybe clean a bit, if she really has nothing to do?

As a nanny for that age, all I did was school pick up, make sure homework was done, and play a sport or do LEGO if the child wanted me too and asked. As I was paid significantly more than £10ph I offered to meal prep, pop the laundry in and out, and vacuum/organize but mostly because I was bored.

Milkywayfan · 03/07/2019 22:32

Even if she was nanny not a babysitter this would still be fine most nights (if it suits your child). Nannies also about making sure child is safe, secure and happy and for most 8 year olds many days after school they just want to relax. If child was unhappy or bored or all screen time I would be concerned. But for 8!year old sometimes the best care is just space and being there.

youngestisapsycho · 03/07/2019 22:33

what is it exactly you would like her to be doing? have you spoken to her about your concerns?