To ask for help :-( **Graphic - Thread title edited at OP's request**

[boredaloneandwaiting]

Just had a baby (three days ago!)

All well but had a pretty traumatic birth ending in forceps and episiotomy. Was in hospital then got early this morning. Before being discharged I had to do a wee (after catheter removal) and have my bladder scanned. All good.

Tonight I went upstairs to do my first poo (sorry!) and before I even got my pants off I lost complete control of my bladder. Cue bleeding and weeing on the floor. :-( think the bleeding was from my stitches (I've had bleeding there since birth).

I also haven't managed to do a poo as it was so painful I couldn't even sit on the toilet or push at all.

I tried pressing a wet flannel on my stitches but that didn't really help :-(

Any advice or similar stories??

Please I'm feeling particularly crap tonight :-(

Surprised nobody mentioned magnesium! You can get high dose supplements of magnesium citrate or carbonate. Magnesium is a natural stool softener and most effective if taken with lots of water. It does help to soften the “hard poo” that’s already there. Lactulose tended to make me bloated and gassy (no fun on top of constipation) but I had no side effects with magnesium. For really bad days I combined Lactulose and magnesium...that clears out anything! Good luck and hope you feel better soon!

soak a sanitary pad and feeeze it.. then sit on it with a thin towel wrapped around. Also pour cold water on yourself as you are having a wee and lean forward when you are weeing. Have you got a donut cushion? A donut cushion saved me when i had stitches after birth and made it slightly more comfortable to sit down. get a sanitary pad and hold yourself where the stitches are when you have your first pooit made me feel more confident and made me not feel like my whole insides would fall out. Do not clean your stitches with anything other than water as they will get infected. erm i have lots of advice since i got stitches and ended up with them being infected (i think due to soap dripped down in the shower and me not drying myself thoroughly as i was too scared to touch it)

Sorry I haven't read all the replies - partly because I'm about a week off having my second and this was my experience with my first. It does take a while to feel ok again but you will.
My main advice is watch for signs of wound infection. If it feels hot or v painful (getting worse painful) then go back to the labour ward and they will do a proper check and give you antibiotics if needed. I think once the pain passed - with the antibiotics, I began to regain some bladder function. Have lots of showers, i actually think that helps more to wash everything properly. Take care.

I had very little bladder control for first week or more, I was horrified. Didn't know when I needed to go... Couldn't feel if I was even successfully doing kegels. I had no idea my body would do that to me post birth, honestly I remember the shock. Due to massive bruising and possible temp nerve damage. Anyway, it got markedly better within a couple of weeks, then a slow improvement over the next months. Just take it easy and rest lots. Sit down, lie down! Promise things improve so so much, just give yourself time and get further support if you need it.

Ps I'm totally back to normal now, just a slightly weak bladder that would be fine if I wasnt so lazy with kegels

I had episiotomy and stitches first time and stitches for a tear the second - infected both times! Get stitches checked as often as you can. Re pooing, I had the fear big time but it really wasn’t that bad. Have a strong coffee and go for it! Also position wise, slightly hovering can help as you’re not bearing down quite as much. Good luck, and god speed 💪

I had to poo in the bath (the first one after bath) as it was the only way I could do it and I was desperate! Like warm water filled only until it covers your stitches and try (I think I was squatting). Totally degrading but it worked for me and the relief after was so good

first one after birth

When my boss had her C section she was given laxative, did you not get any? I would be inclined to go back to the dr.

You are superwoman, OP.

If it helps the day after I had my son I shat myself on the floor of the hospital loo. In front of my husband. By that stage he'd seen worse anyway so I only cared for about 5 minutes.

Get some lactulose asap. You can get it over the counter and it's not absorbed into the bloodstream so fine with breastfeeding (I took it through pregnancy). Will make your poo soft if you drink plenty of water

It feels like your insides will come out the first time but they honestly dont. Everyone goes through this or most people do so not sure why more people dont talk about it. I had some good friends who told me to take lactulose into the hospital with me to prepare me

Well, I have never been so thankful to strangers before, I feel like you are all friends now 🙈

I have pooped!!!!!!

Used the witch hazel flannel on the bits technique and went for it! I cried for about 20 mins after poor dh was most concerned until I told him it was relief!!! I feel like a new woman 🙈 so much less pain than I was in before!

A thousand million thank yous to everyone!!!!

Congratulations! Definitely dulcoease or lactulose and if you have a warm bath first, then try to go with a warm flannel firmly against your stitches, it's a bit more comfy. Healthy recovery to you

Yay!! The first poo is done!! You can enjoy motherhood now!!

Aha! Crosspost! Congrats on the poo!

God, I remember the relief! Well done you, OP. Relax, hydrate, snuggle newborn, eat cake. Good job

Ah well done bored!

Every poop from now will be easier than the one before. Honestly, they should allow us to go home with a little cylinder of gas and air for the first postpartum poo! 💩

Yey so pleased for you! Congratulations.

I’ve just had my third baby - trust me when I say buy some lactulose and take 10ml twice a day. It will fly out 😂

I didn’t poo for well over two weeks. It was agony and I cried and cried. You are not alone.

Try raising your feet when you poo and have something to grip on to. Like only a couple of inches - try different loos in the house as some might have different floor levels and it makes a difference. Press a towel on your stitches. When you feel you can poo, just go. Don’t go to the loo, if you’re at home just let it go as you’ll be in a ‘good’ position if you feel you want to go. As grim as it sounds it’s just a bit of poo and If it means you go, then it’s fine. It’s not dignified, it’s awful but you will get through it.

Try witch hazel on the pads too

Probably the same advice as others have given but make sure you’re not constipated and holding a clean, folded sanitary towel at your stitches, press firmly so your insides don’t fall out.
Once you’ve done that first awful post natal poo, all the rest are ok after.
Try some prunes or a curry etc to get your bowels moving.

God yes, I remember crying with relief too, is it weird to say I'm happy for you OP?

I am so relieved for you OP. Just rtft with my legs crossed.

Wahoo! So happy for you, what a relief!

when you wee, touch your toes. It sounds so strange but I was you 10 weeks ago and I read it somewhere online. It alters the angle of the wee away from the stitches. Also second the warm water as you wee, and witch hazel and lavender oil on the thickest pads you can find. Change it regularly too as I find if it ‘dries’ the stitches get hard and sore x