to consider present for dd's third birthday inappropriate

[MellyMum]

My dd was 3 recently, she received loads of really nice pressies or money from older relatives - great! Thankyou notes have been sent already.
But I was pretty annoyed when she received her gift from dp's brother and partner, who also have kids. It was a card picked from save the children, informing us that for my dd's b/day a school uniform had been sent to a child who needs it.
I am all for donating money to charity, especially children's charity, if you can afford it, but to do it for a little girl's b/day strikes me as being fairly inappropriate and highly pretentious.
Also my dd is their only niece, as BIL's partner is an only. We are in regular contact, they have their own kids, so it's not as if they don't know what stage she's at or what she might like. Could they not have come up with something better for her rather than trying to make themselves feel good? AIBU?!

makes it more annoying that for what it was it could have been EVEN more appropriate

or rather - for something so inappropriate it could have been more appropriate, iyswim

This isn't the first time they have fucked you off, is it? What is it about them that you dislike so much?

I do agree it is annoying to feel that your dc have been slighted or overlooked but this really IS NOT a huge deal, unless you choose to make it so

YANBU

They bought 'gift' for them , to make them feel good

not for your dd who at 3 is far too young to understand.

If she was older then a thoughtful iaginative gift but inappropriate for a 3 year old

tbh I'm not that bothered,just wanted other opinions and have been fired by them.

What annoys me more is knowing the thought that i put into presents, especially for kids, and realising that some people just don't bother but are more interested in trying to impress with novel, moralistic ideas.

My DP's brother isn't worth getting het up about to me, but i still have my opinions on the whole subject and that is what i am airing and sharing.

If they ask i will tell them what i thought of their idea, but i'm not worked up enough to bother talking to them about it otherwise.

buy them a cow...as a thank you

Just curious, what exactly did your DD do when she "received their gift"?

You are assuming that they wanted to impress you & be moralistic

they may have thought it was a thoughtful and unusual gift which would be received with joy

no it's not me i think they wanted to impress, more like people/friends they could tell about it. They probably just wanted to get on my tits!!

which they managed!!!

Well they succeeded then . Go on tell us why they piss you off so much.

my dd didn't receive their 'gift' as there wasn't one, we all looked at the standard card and picture inside, said who it was from and then it went in the bin

well, they would have to be extremely optimistic, some would say naive, or even others might say verging on the deluded, to think that a THREE year old would receive with joy the news that her present had been sent to someone else.

BIRTHDAYS are not the time for this - for a three year old!

There are 364 other days of the year on which she can give things to others and learn to enjoy that. Let the three year old have her birthday presents and don't be so po-faced about it! She's 3!

Its a crap gift

they piss me off because in everything they do they are pretentious tw*ts (insert your own vowel!)

hmmm....still trying to decide who really has the problem here....although, sorry my conclusion right now it would be you, Mellymum, sorry....
but obviously this is more about your history with them, rather then this actually!
What a shame though that you didn't keep the card....

Erm I think that really sucks. To not even stick the card on the shelf with the other cards is just petty!

no hatrick because when she is older IS NOT NOW, when she has just turned 3. If, when she is older, it is something she thinks is a good idea then that is the time for that kind of gift