To refuse to give someone a lift because of their weight?

[EmmaGrundyForPM]

Someone I know is struggling to get to a hospital appointment. They dont qualify for hospital transport. We live rurally so public transport is limited.

I work near the hospital and they have strongly hinted that they would really appreciate a lift there. Normally I would be happy to offer. However, this person is very overweight. I dont know exactly how much he weighs but I know it's over 30 stone. I'm concerned about whether my car can take the weight. But maybe it can? I don't want to refuse if it wont damage my car.

WIBU to make an excuse to not give a lift?

If you are concerned, why can't he get a cab? You can see from driver/non driver threads that there are loads of reasons drivers don't want to play taxi. Cab is a viable option.

I understand the distribution of weight issue, my last tiny (shit) 1litre car struggled taking 3/4 adults so it would be a no for me in that car. My current car is a 2 litre and had no issues struggling with 4 adults, baby and car seat plus pram and suitcases. With that car i would say yes if they were friend/family and no if they were CF.

I think best to ignore the hinting. It could easily turn into a regular thing if you let it start and then it's much harder to stop. If he asks directly just say 'sorry I won't be able to' and leave it at that.

Not sure why people are being nasty to OP.

Having a 30 stone person in your car sitting on one side is a lot different than having 4 x 10 stone people spread out in the car. If there’s a huge weight on one side of your car it can effect steering and suspension on that side. If OP has a smart car of diet 500 then they are not meant to carry huge weights. If it’s just a one off it’s unlikely to do any damage so I would probably still offer a lift (as long as you don’t own a smart car).

I'm surprised you're getting such a hard time OP. The thread people are referencing was one from a while ago where the OP had been asked to carry to overweight people up a hill to their house on a regular basis because they couldn't walk it. She was overwhelmingly told that it would break her car and not to do it.

I think that it is too much weight for one seat and definitely will not be beneficial to your car. I would not offer.

Two* people

I think there is a chance they might damage your seats, but also affect the suspension and steering/handling - which might be unsafe (though I am no expert). Awkward to explain to them without referring to their weight though, so I think I'd be tempted to just ignore the hints/give the impression of being v busy/generally avoid talking to them ).

What we need on here is a taxi driver who can tell us from a technical pov what they do in this situation!

I once gave a lift to two large people.

It cost me a new exhaust.

Has OP told us the make and model of her car yet? I've skimmed through and maybe missed it

I've stopped offering my ex lifts when he's had lo as the suspension where he sits kept going. He can't sit in the front as I then can't change gears. My mums had to as the seatbelt doesn't go round him in her car.

I don't think it's unreasonable, but wouldn't say why to spare feelings. Just say that you can't and leave it at that.

@endofthelinefinally Tue 25-Jun-19 22:34:00
My car was damaged by someone very overweight. It is a very difficult situation. At the time I didn't think. The seat was broken and the suspension damaged.
Maybe check with the manufacturer?
The other risk is the steering and braking distance.
I am the last person to want to not help someone or hurt their feelings, but you have to be sensible.

Really?

If they were that big that they could break a car's suspension, they wouldn't even be able to get in it in the first place

Seriously? Just wow.

Everyone who has had cars damaged through giving lifts to overweight people, have you asked them to pay for the damage? I used to give a lift to someone about 27 stone, and I'm sure if he'd damaged the car he would have known about it and offered to pay.

Eliza9919
It was 30 years ago, a metro. The seat was pushed back as far as it would go and the person squeezed in.
The seat broke.
I took it to the garage for advice about the seat repair and they told me the suspension was damaged. It certainly was making a strange squeaking sound.
I am not a liar.

30+ year old metro's are entirely different to current cars. Today's cars are much more robust and heavy duty

I had a metro. I doubt someone 30st would have been able to get in it.

If OP has a smart car of diet 500

😂😂 What an applicable autocorrect

I would probably try to get out of it, could get awkward if you by default become his go to person for hospital visits, maybe he needs a sustainable solution?

Nowhere in any of my posts did I say that the person who damaged my car weighed 30 stone.
I said they were very overweight.
I did not weigh them.
The OP said the person who wants a lift in her car is 30 stone.
I used my experience to warn her that this would be risky.

You have a valid question OP,ignore the pp who are having a laugh.😀
The weight in one space may cause your car some strain,and they could be heavier than 30 stone,as I don't suppose they have ever mentioned their weight?
Speak to the local garage for your make of car and see what advice they have.
A difficult situation for you,I hope you are able to conclude this and keep on neighbourly terms.

Wow

Ofred This made me snort out loud in the hairdressers

I actually drove a colleague to a work meeting once years ago and the seat belt wouldn't go around her! I had to decide whether to drive her illegally or refuse to take her.

One part of me would feel guilty refusing to give him a lift, the other part would be concerned id be left with a broken seat and out of pocket.
Can he afford to pay if there is any damage?
I don't think he should have put you in this position by asking, as terrible and restricting as obesity is, he must recognise his size and consider it might be a problem for you and your car.
Yanbu.