To feel envious of people that can afford holidays?

[Ella1980]

I'm a full-time TA and my fiancé works in social care ft. Just feel so sad that we can't afford to take the kids away. Ex earns £105k+ pa so at least they'll get a holiday with him. Anybody else in a similar position? It just feels so unfair but I feel selfish for feeling jealous of not getting a break with the family 😢

I've just been catching up on the thread and found that even the OP only calls certain holidays 'holidays'!! So a camping holiday is not a holiday? How many more of these holidays have you had this year? And your savings don't count as they are for you to own your own home one day. All the while people without savings (or the hopes of ever owning their own home) and for who a few days in a tent is a lovely holiday spend their time sharing tips with you so you can have a holiday!! Sorry but that's really not fair @ella1980

OP I haven't read the whole post but I just want to say that I come from a single parent home, we NEVER went on holiday unless my Grandparents took us to Butlins and I can honestly say I had the happiest childhood ever!

Children don't care about holidays so don't feel bad. Yes it sucks that you can't get a holiday either, but don't worry about not being able to take your kids. Your focus should be on making your home a happy home filled with amazing memories!

DH never went on holiday as a child, because his parents couldn’t afford it; and he had a happy childhood!

What I find so frustrating is that I was in a very similar position to the OP - an ex-primary teacher needing to change direction. I too had problems in my life at the time, not the same problems as the OP, but fairly significant problems all the same. It took nearly a year and dozens of applications but I eventually got a job in a different field and have never looked back. Since then I have done a postgraduate degree and acquired skillsets in areas that I barely knew existed when I was teaching. But at the same time, my teaching experience is respected and highly regarded by my employers, because I frame it as the underpinning basis of my expertise.

I never even considered it, but yes it would have been far easier to slip into a TA role somewhere and be there saying it is all so unfair, I used to be a teacher dontcha know.

Sorry OP, your attitude is pathetic. I mean that in the original sense, in that I feel sorry for your lack of ability to see beyond the boundaries you have set for yourself.

Most misleading thread title ever! The OP can afford a holiday but doesn't want to spend the money (& has actually been on one already this year!)

The only good to come out of this thread is that, hopefully, people who want to go on holiday but are struggling to afford one may find some of the advice given on budget holidays helpful. Otherwise, it's a total waste of 28 pages!

MaybeDoctor well said! Well done you! Inspiring!

It is so clear that you'd been plotting revenge and the resent you are so miserable is because it backfired. In the end, you stayed with him and chose to have two children. Of course leaving someone 2ho has control9ver you is not easy, so good on you to have done so, but you waned him to pay. You planned on going without warning him and taking your two kids, then grtas much as possible out of the divorce and get a hefty maintenance. You'd worked out that even reducing your income significantly, you'd be OK.

Sadly, he defended himself and you didn't get what you wanted. There is probably an underlying sense of victory from him that must be hard to swallow, another way of him showing his control over you.

But what you don't seem to see is tsht instead of fully liberating yourself from him, your resentment is making I'm still control you. He has what you wish you had. He belives that you regret leaving him.

You really need to break free. You have up a life of comfort and luxury but you got your freedom from an abuser, surely that's more important than anything else? You didn't get your revenge, so what? Life is not about punishing people for what they do to you, it's about breaking free, physically and mentally from them. Let go.

Haven't read whole thread so apologies if already suggested, but have you thought about marking exam papers during summer holidays? I have several teacher friends who do this to earn extra cash for 'luxuries' like holidays. You can fit the hours around children - early mornings/evenings etc.

Smh. Read the last few pages instead of the first ones Thingsdogetbetter.

Ella, you are NOT a failure! It’s totally understandable to feel jealous but don’t compare yourself to others. My first “proper going on a plane” holiday was to Spain at 13, only because someone we knew kindly let us use their holiday apartment. I knew things were tight and would never have thought less of my Mum.

You can have some lovely UK breaks that don’t cost the earth.

👌

@jam30 Ella has been in a camping holiday this year. She didn't like it. She's got thousands in the bank so she isn't skint at all.

She won't thank the posters who have tried to help her. She'd rather wallow in self pity and bitterness.

Thank you to all of the posters who have tried to helped me. I am sorry I find it hard to accept that I lost my children half of the time to a vile abuser.

You are beyond help Ella

@ssd Thank you for your kind words.

There's holiday and holiday..
Holiday to many is package to white block in med. Buffet and kids club.

Firstly that's out of our league money wise and secondly that's my idea of hell.
Op one year we had one night away in b and b last min by sea.

We left early in am, b and b was by beach, had fabulous weather and drove back late next day. Felt like a week was glorious. Lots of youth hostels do 25%off in holidays.... Family room, en suit, self cater.

I started to save 10 a month and 5 a week... For over a year then increases holiday to 4 nights away and so on.
Always sourced by me.. No package... Self catering... Own transport, tesco vouchers.