to not turn up to court?

[gtigti]

Family law matter. I haven't received any paperwork as I'm living at a confidential address. It may be at my old address (friends house) but I haven't picked any post up from there as I've changed all my important paperwork. I didn't realise I was expecting court paperwork.

Turns out I'm due in court tomorrow. No time to get legal representation or legal aid sorted. Don't know what time the hearing is. Don't even know what it's for.

AIBU to not turn up or will that make me look like I don't care? I'm scared I will turn up completely unprepared and unaware of what I'm walking in to.

My address is confidential and I have an injunction against my ex. The hearing for this was held where I live now so he clearly knows I'm not in my previous city anymore.

What do I do?

I would always turn up to court.

Why did your friend not pass on the documents? Can she open them and read them to you? How far away are you from her?

Is your XH taking you to court?

@HollowTalk it's 3 hours away and I have a 7 month old. I just don't know how I'm going to manage it. I can't take him with me and he's not in nursery. Nobody to have him for the day. I don't even know what the hearing is for.

Yes he's taking me to court. He was abusive and I've kept his baby away from him as he's not safe. He's lost his temper at him before and I had to remove him from him as I believed he was going to shake him. He's so scary.

You need to go. Depending on what its about, the judge may rule against you automatically if you don't show up.

@BinkyBaa I can't go to court with a baby though. I literally only found out about it a few days ago. I believe it's regarding a Child Arrangement Order as CAFCASS contacted me.

Phone the court and explain. They can help

How did you find out?

What’s the injunction against him for?

You need to turn up to court I think or else you might face the possibility of sanctions?

There will be someone who knows far more than I do along soon I hope but I am sure you can apply for an adjournment citing the grounds re your address and non receipt of papers. You can have half an hour free legal advice and they could start the ball rolling with legal aid application

Is there any evidence of his abusive behaviour towards your baby?

Sorry you are going through this but perhaps your injunction might help in terms of contact and safeguarding at least to stall things tomorrow but you need to prepare as much as you can.

@Passthecherrycoke I did and they asked their legal adviser who said it's still going to go ahead. How they can expect me to attend I don't know. I've just asked my friend about the post and there's nothing there so I haven't been sent the paperwork at all.

Sorry cross post

I would call the court as a matter of urgency.
They might be about to resist later in the week which if it’s in his hometown ........
Explain where you are etc

Phone the court right away and explain what’s going on - they can advise you.

Simply not turning up is the worst thing you could do, because the court will most likely just rule against you in your absence, and fighting such a ruling would be expensive. It would honestly be better for you to turn up unprepared and holding your baby than to just not go.

If you do need to go (as in the court tells you the hearing has to go ahead), tell the judge that you need more time to prepare and to get legal representation.

I think family courts have children's rooms but I don't know how it works with a baby. Ring cafcass for advice.

@Ginlinessisnexttogodliness I found out because CAFCASS phoned me.

It's a non-molestation Order due to abuse, and I do have evidence yes.

I'm so scared that if I don't turn up it'll look bad but I have no idea what I'll do with my 7 month old. I've phoned last minute childcare's and they're booked up for over a month in advance. Friends are all working. I'm so stuck.

Take a 'McKenzies friend' and one to watch the baby?
There should be a duty solicitor there who can help you. Take evidence of his abuse. Police letter? Crime number? Ring the court now and explain.

Phone the court office and explain and see what they advise. Do you have a solicitor where the hearing is, or do you know of any reputable solicitor who might be able to ask for a continuance in your absence? Otherwise you’ll have to attend and ask in person, but I think it would be a mistake not to go

So the court know that you know about the hearing now- you can’t pretend you didn’t know because you didn’t get the notice. I think you have to go but tell the judge everything you’ve told us- no time to prepare etc

@Whathappenedtooursummer how do I find a Mckenzie friend?

The court don't pick up the phone (on hold for 45 minutes then cut off). I've had to email.

Phone the court and say you have had a call about this but no paper work. You have not had time to arrange childcare. Ask if it is still down to proceed and what you should do given you have no one to care for your child.

You can take a 7 month old to court, they aren't going going to be damaged by hearing anything. With a sleeping baby you can probably deal with the hearing. If they are wailing at hearing time it will likely be adjourned (no one in the court will look after the baby for you).

I'm sure family courts have people there who can care for DC. Have you asked?

I've just had an email back. It's still to go ahead but they've advised I just email back and explain why I can't attend. It still seems so wrong to do that. To just not attend. I don't want to turn up with my son either though. It's 3 hours there on a good day and that's without stopping. It'll be 7+ hours of driving in a day. That's mad with a 7 month old. I don't know I would even be safe doing that I'm so exhausted.

I'm just sounding things out here. Going to try and find someone to have my son. He'll just have to have formula for the day if I can find someone to have him.

Definitely try to get there but do speak to the court of logistics a challenge. The first hearing would be to decide to get a Cafcass report sk if Cafcass are already in contact is this the 2nd hearing?

Have you been interviewed by Cafcass yet?

I agree with PP - I think not showing up is the worst thing you could do. What if the judge rules in his favor because you didn't show up? Would that be worse than going on short notice with no childcare?

@GeorgeTheFirst I was under the impression that you cannot take children of any age to court with you.

If they’ve said don’t attend with a reason submitted then that’s exactly what I’d do

I don't know if this is of any help to you, but these people do free legal advice over the phone: [[https://rightsofwomen.org.uk/get-advice/advice-lines/]]