I want to go grey, but DH says no!

[KindleAndCake]

Who is being unreasonable?
I'm in my 40's and fed up of the constant dying of my hair. I've said I'm going to stop, but he says no. He really doesn't want me to. I've pointed out that he is going grey, but it seems it's one rule for him, and all that.

Out of interest, does constant dying your hair make it go grey quicker?

Thank you both. 😍

Not to brag but I have very nice long hair and I'm going to let it go grey. I'm 50 and I think it's going to look amazing.

Why are u even asking this question??? Your hair. End of. And just for the record why did u even discuss this with him? Makes you sound insecure and just plain silly

Vicliz- you look amazing. You are clearly super cool and not fuddy duddy!

Not too brag?? Why wud u want long hair in your 50s.... Witchy

@Vicliz24 Wow! Your hair is fabulous and I am hoping mine is going to go the same way...my grey at the front is the same shade as yours. I think you look beautiful!

Not too brag?? Why wud u want long hair in your 50s.... Witchy

What an atrocious cunt you are.

AlaskanOilBaron

I would agree with you, but a cunt is warm and deep. No sign of warmth from that poster’s comment. I think gobshite is more appropriate.

TheformidableMrsC
Trust me it's a fun journey. It can seem as if it's never going to be done but try to wait until you have no colour left before you really make your mind up . I cut mine really short and with hindsight I wouldn't do the same again as the shock of grey and half an inch long was huge 😂 I almost caved in at that point but forced myself not to colour until I'd gone six more months. By then I was loving it

So agree with jeepers creepers69 - why are you even asking this question

@KindleAndCake I started going grey in my 20s and stopped dying my hair about age 40. Just couldn’t be bothered any more. He is being unreasonable, if you don’t want to do it any more, don’t. It’s such a hassle.

....@KindleAndCake I’d like to add that I still care about how I look and dress, I just have grey hair now.

Everything you read about whether dying your hair speeds up it turning grey, says it makes no difference!

However, my mother never dyed her hair and didn’t have many grey hairs when she died in her eighties.
I have never used anything more than occasional semi permanent colouring and don’t have many grey hairs in my fifties.
My sister, on the other hand, had permanently dyed hair from her early twenties. Her hair started going grey in her early thirties. She continued to dye it to cover it up and was completely grey before she was forty!
Might be coincidence....

Thankyou everyone. It's so interesting reading everyone's views. I don't know what I will do. I would love to stop the faff of dying, spending all the money, using all the chemicals etc., but I have been quite taken aback by dh's reaction.
Those of you posting pictures, you all look gorgeous.

Cheers xx didnt apreciate the C word but beggars cant be choosers when mingling

My dh has a beard, I prefer him with a beard, when he shaves it off I make it clear I don't like it as much but tell him it's his face. My dh prefers my hair longer but makes it clear it's whatever makes me happy. The thing is we both take on board what the other thinks. He has a beard and I have long hair. I want to pander to what he likes, I signed up for that. That's my choice. I applaud your dh for telling you how he feels, obviously you can do what you want. Unless you are dressing in a genderless way then you buy in to one rule for women another for men so I guess this is an extension of that. He will find you less attractive physically in one respect but it's not the be all and end all and I imagine there is more to your relationship than this.

Your hair so your choice . I think dying your hair looks odd when you get to a certain stage - implausible and gives a vibe you're not happy in your skin.

God, there are some revoltingly misogynistic comments on this thread.

I stopped dyeing my hair a couple of years ago. I look fucking fantastic - much cooler, much more chic, much more stylish. I get compliments all the time. I'm 46 next month.

Oh and I wear a lot of black, btw. Grey hair isn't ageing me, but pale blue pastels definitely would...

I’m 34 and have stopped dying my hair. I’ve been getting grey hairs since I was 21, and have two white stripes at my temples and a good smattering of random grey hairs throughout my hair.
I was spending a fortune dying it at the salon, for the cheesy to show through after a week or two. Even less time if I used a box dye. My greys don’t hold dye well.

So I’ve just stopped dying it. Quite frankly I couldn’t give a fuck if I look older than I am, as other people’s opinions of my appearance matter not. Unless they want to tell me I look fabulous.

I asked DP what he thought to my going grey. He said that his opinion was that it’s my hair and I should do whatever I damn well please with it.

I like my hair. It feels like me. Authentic me.

@Vicliz24 I think I might stop with the lowlights actually, I ask her to leave the silver streaks at the front and in my fringe because my hair grows very quickly and it would look ridiculous. I've got a choppy, layered, just past my shoulders type cut. I can only ever have lowlights as dye can't ever touch my skin so covering it completely is not an option going forward. I'll just have to stick it out! If I end up with colouring like yours I'll be delighted! I love how very blue it makes my eyes

@bingbongnoise well said on all counts!!! And thank god someone else sees the blatant Mumsnet hypocrisy on here.

Well, I'm keeping the grey strips - extending the grey , the less make up, and my black, sustainably designed clothes with the odd shot of dark green colours chucked in for good measure.

Seriously, I'd have people asking me if I was mentally unwell if I started getting about in pastels, it'd be so out of character.
The thought that grey hair equals pastels tones for clothes has given me a super giggle fit this morning. So thanks to whoever posted that one, I needed a laugh.

Such an emotive issue for something that is such personal choice.
Do what you want. Your Dh needs to respect that.

This is my lovely grey stripe.

63 and have low and highlights!
Tell him to do one !!!
You could if you want to appease him take the low/highlight option and change it slowly.

I think I’m in the minority here. I can see his point as he is looking at you constantly and vice versa.

If the OP was fat would it be OK for her husband to tell her to lose weight because he doesn't like looking at her.
On here nobody is ever allowed to say they don't fancy their partner anymore because she has put weight on, but apparently not dying your hair is an acceptable reason.