To think most women hope for a baby girl?

[Rowennaravenclaw]

I know, once the baby is here, we love them and wouldn't change them for anything, whatever their sex.

But before the baby arrives, I think that the majority of women want a daughter. If you google gender disappointment, there seem to be way more hits about wanting a girl than a boy. I think it's probably natural, seeing as we have all been little girls ourselves and so imagine them to be a known quantity, and people tend to be drawn to what is familiar. Of course it changes once the baby arrives and we get to know the special person they are.

So, controversial, but AIBU?

No, i wanted a boy and had two one after the other. Then had another baby a few years later, a girl this time. When she was only very little I was in the supermarket with them all and a lady I've never met came up to me and said, So you got your girl then! It took me a minute to realise what she meant after she'd nodded to my boys. I said we weren't trying for a girl. Strange how people assume things!

I really wanted a boy when I was pregnant. I wouldn't have minded either way, really, but when I was told DS was a boy I was absolutely delighted.

I honestly was so desperate for my babies to be born alive I never thought about their sex. Most women I know felt the same or at least didn’t have a preference.

I wanted a boy because I thought a boy would sail through life in comparison to what girls have to deal with.

I was wrong, my ds was bullied, and had anxiety and depression. In comparison my dd pretty much sailed through!

My first born was a boy. I always wanted a boy first. With my second I cried when I found out it was a girl at the 20 week scan. The minute she arrived I was so grateful for my beautiful girl. 2 years down the line I love my boy and love my girl. I do think though girls will always tell you their secrets and need you whereas the boys find new women to mind them.

Secretly I wanted a boy. I convinced myself it was a girl so I wouldn’t feel let down if it wasn’t since I knew I’d probably have only one. It was a boy and I was shocked (But thrilled)

Yes, but that doesn't mean that MOST WOMEN want a baby girl. It means that MOST WOMEN WHO COMPLAIN wanted a baby girl. It's two completely different things

Not sure why you're yelling at me...I just mentioned my experience of hearing women express their feelings/hopes/whatever. The AIBU is about women hoping for a baby girl.

Fwiw, I don't recall anyone complaining, it's just women saying they have a preference. I think that's perfectly fine - lots of people here have commented that they wanted to have boys.

Having a preference is seemingly pretty normal. 'Gender disappointment' is a long way from that.

I don't think you're right op.

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Missing_women

Really happy when my first was a boy. Really happy when my second was a girl. Would also have been really happy if any of those had been different.

I was completely indifferent, but my idiot MIL and SILs thought I must be terribly upset when the scan showed a boy, as we knew this was going to be our only child, and despite the fact that I regard shopping as a chore and loathe spas, they appeared to think I would be mourning my inability to do this because I didn’t have a girl.

They refused to believe that I was perfectly happy to be carrying a boy and congratulated me on how ‘brave’ I was being.

So I conclude that not only do some women think as you do, OP, but, weirdly, they lack a theory of mind and think all women feel as they do.

In my heart of hearts, i knew I be de devastated if I never had a daughter. Dd is likely to be our only child, took years of heartache to have her, if we were lucky enough, I’d love a little boy too but I don’t see it happening and am very happy I have my daughter ☺️ ( Even though she refuses to sleep as I’m trying to watch Gogglebox)

The fact that men are likelier to walk out on their family if they have daughters and no sons is so depressing.

I occasionally hear the very Victorian - or almost Medieval - mindset that a girl is a mini-Mum and a boy a mini-Dad. Such women will say things like, "oh, I've given him his boy" "oh, I've got my girl". Extremely old-fashioned, and probably damaging to the children involved, who will be brought up within rigid rules of sexual stereotyping, girls dressed in frills playing with dolls, boys dressed in their Dad's team's football strip, rolling in mud and fighting.

I don't know. To me it seems so difficult to raise a girl. How do you keep them safe when such a high percentage gets sexually assaulted? How do you explain the facts of life when media tells them that they can be a boy by just wishing it. How do you explain that some men just hate women? How do you keep their reputation safe when every drunken mistake gets plastered over instagram? I'm glad that I grew up in a different time pre-internet.

Raising a boy just seems safer. Although I would have to hammer in what consent is and how to be a good partner. For some reason that seems easier to me. Could just be me though.

I said YANBU because in my small world most women I know wanted girls unless they had trouble conceiving and then they didn't mind. I wanted a girl a little more than I wanted a boy (and DH wanted a boy a little more than he wanted a girl!). I realise it isnt always rhe case though! The women I know who wanted girls but had boys weren't too disappointed

I wanted a girl and after 2 boys had my DD we have a great time together , she is now 17 and we have nights away just the 2 of us , go shopping together etc it's a different relationship than with her brothers .

I prayed non stop for a boy during both pregnancies.

I haven't stopped praising for them yet!

DH has admitted his relief too tbh.

I dread another pregnancy in the event that it is a girl. Seriously.

After 6 IVF rounds, 2 ectopics and a miscarriage, I was delighted my baby made it into the world at all.

I had another few rounds of IVF, a missed miscarriage before having my second, and I had a horrible birth which was touch and go for a few seconds.

Be grateful for what you've got.

As the only child of an only daughter, I really wanted a girl. I had absolutely no experience of boys - no cousins etc.

I adore the three boys I have. I didn’t feel complete until I had my girl.

I don't think it's so much that more women want girls than want boys. It's more that the women who seem most disappointed at getting the 'wrong' sex, tend to be the ones that wanted a girl. in my experience, anyway.

I had a several friends who wanted girls and didn't get one. Each of them already had a boy (in one case, three boys!). Although obviously they loved their 'wrong' boys, they were honest about how much they'd have liked a girl.

I don't know any mother who expressed disappointment about getting a girl when they wanted a boy, though. Maybe that's a father thing.

I'm one of those who really didn't mind and was happy getting a surprise when baby was born!
So a definite vote for YABU from me!

When I found out I was pregnant with DTs I wanted two boys. DH is an ex professional sportsman and now a teacher so does a lot of childcare and I was worried about how he'd cope with girls (he's a bit alpha male).

Forgot to add I have only boys, and definitely don't feel the need to keep going to try for a girl like some used to say - "don't you want a girl as well?"
Me - nope, happy with my lot

I honestly wasn't bothered either way what I had.

I had a boy and he's amazing but I'm sure if he'd been a girl I would have been equally happy.

He will be our only child so no worries about having another boy or getting a girl.

Weirdly though, when I was pregnant, we had DS name from about 18 weeks but never really settled on a girls name (we didn't know we were having a boy). Maybe subconsciously, I wanted a boy more than a girl.

I did want a girl. My first was a boy and I had a horrific pregnancy with sickness and spd. I had hyperemesis with my second so when I found out she was a girl I did have a cry (of happiness) because I knew I couldnt have gone through pregnancy again.
If she had been a boy then of course I would have loved the bones of him but I would have felt sad at never having a girl.