To be mad at step children on father’s day

[Herewegoagain123]

My darling step children really are something else. My husband is a great dad, does so much for them (as he should).

It’s their weekend with their mother but nevertheless they don’t live far away and we did see them the end of last week.

Eldest one is working and I gave him a little reminder - nothing, not even a text for his dad.

Youngest asked me to get her a gift and card (Following my reminder), I gave them to her and they are still sitting unwritten in her bedroom!

They are both prolific users of social media and not a single text or call.

I’m sad for DH. They’re old enough to know better.

I’m really surprised what a roasting you’re getting OP.

Sounds to me like you’re venting on here rather than giving out to your SC or showing your DH that you’re disappointed for him. And I get that. OH commented sadly yesterday that the post had been and no FD card from his (young adult) DCs.

FWIW I do agree it’s early and that there is plenty time left of the day for them to text or pop in.

I'm guessing why the OP has not mentioned their ages I bet it's because they are older teens...they have proberbly only just got in from a night out!! You need to Chill out!! I hate these forced days...i think if you need a day to tell people how much you love them then something is wrong.

I think if you read other threads this lady quoted not liking her step children, but just tolerating them for DH. I think you are trying to think of anything to put them in a bad light, feel sorry for your DH.

A 15 year old has a poutie selfie on Instagram this early on a Sunday?
I don't buy that for a minute.

Why are you following her on Instagram if you don't get on with her anyway.

I hadn't called my day when you started this thread.

YABU

From here on in...leave her to buy her dad his card and gifts.

My DC have been doing so from around year 6...so 11 yo. Just a card or a small token.

You seem to have a lot of anger where your SC are concerned. Let it go and leave them to it.

My DS1 aged 15 hasn’t emerged yet and I had to remind DS2 aged 11 that today is FD. DH isn’t remotely bothered.

I suspect I am the only one in the family that gives a shit about it - even the guinea pigs are asleep!

You'd be well within your rights to feed them poisoned apples and send them with a woodcutter into the forest.

Remind me of my stepmum who would do anything to convince my dad I am awful!

YABU. Teenagers are selfish and most parents are forgiving of that, the teenagers grow out of it and mature.
I no longer have any contact with my father because of his interfering and manipulative wife. Your posts are like something she would have written about me and my siblings from her own twisted point of view. Don't get involved in your DH relationship with his DCs and I hope you don't speak to him about them as spitefully as you do here.

I haven't messaged my dad yet and his father's day things are in my room un written.
I won't see him either as he's gone to a friend's. So I will probably do what your dsd will and write it when I next see him and give it to him then.
A text will be sent from me in the group chat later this afternoon (so my brother will see it and have the reminder to consider copying).

you only have them every other weekend, this is not your weekend. You posted about buying a gift on Monday, you bought a gift.
Has DSD even been round since?!
This doesn't make sense.
But what is MOST confusing is expecting a 15yo to be awake at 843 or "posting a pouty selfie on insta" on a Sunday pre-9am. YEH RIGHT

What kind of StepMum dislikes her DSC to this level?

You’re going to wind up having a stroke

I agree. Getting wound up for nothing.

@lilpumpsmum
The pouting selfie was to paint stepchild in a poor light.

I feel like you are over reacting slightly. At the end of the day its Father's Day... not Husband day. So realistically you've done your bit by getting the gift and card, now leave them to it to do it in their own way.
They aren't youngsters so it's down to them, if they don't make a big song and dance or show any effort then that's on them.
Don't get on their case about it, theres no point.
My dsd has done the card and gift just now and made him a cup of tea and a bowl of cereal. And it's only just 10.
I doubt there will be anything else from her now.

@MancaroniCheese op has been on other threads making her feeling about SD very clear. Her DH is aware and was apparently not fussed about Father's Day. I think that's why she's getting a roasting because this thread seems to be about her feelings about SD more than anything to do with her DH genuinely being upset about a lack of effort from his DC.

I couldn’t get worked up about this. Father’s Day isn’t exactly a birthday. My kids have cards they haven’t given DH and are in bed, my dad rang me and I said happy Father’s Day bit I’m not seeing him as he’s going out for lunch

Do you have your OWN children

I agree with PP that this is not OP's battle to fight and that she needs to examine why she is so angry with her stepchildren, but this question is unpleasant. Plenty of us don't have our OWN children (not through choice in my case) and it has no bearing on whether or not we're able to be reasonable towards other people's.

I haven’t text my dad to with him a happy Father’s Day.

It’s only a day, a day to make people spend money on useless tat and cards.

My teenage daughters have just gone to their dads, I had to make them fill out a car each to take with them, they would have happily not bothered.

I don't think you need to read any other threads to see that the op despises these children. It's pretty distasteful to use any term containing the word "mum" to describe herself in relation to them.

As for, "he's a great dad, he does so much for them"... Really? How is it different to what any dad should do?

This is just the kind of shit my stepmum used to pull. I'm in my 50's now and I've never forgiven her for ruining my relationship with my dad, always shit stirring and causing trouble between us. And yes I blame my dad as well for letting her do it.

@FudgeBrownie2019 mine!!

I always reminded my DCs about Fathers Day. And once they were left home the cards arrived in the post on the Sat, unless they forgot.
They are adult now and I don't remind them but they all sent a funny card.
Good of you to remind them OP, but looks like they may or may not bother to get in touch. Doubt he will get a card.
There's no point if they are going to ignore the reminder.
Don't remind them in the future. And don't buy a card or pressie,

I got mad with my partner’s kids a few years ago when they didn’t bother with Father’s Day and left everything up to me, although I didn’t show my emotions to them but I was secretly fuming inside. IMO they were perfectly capable and old enough to walk to a shop and spend a quid on a card but didn’t bother. However fast forward a few years and they totally spoilt him today (and last year as well actually) and I was the one who totally forgot it was Father’s Day!

It’s totally understandable that you want your DH to feel appreciated and loved but give the kids time- next year they may surprise you.

ChazsBrilliantAttitude can we have a photo of your sleeping guineapigs please.

My adult step children don't bother and haven't for the past few years, one in particular has chosen not to communicate with her dad much at all, through no fault of my dh's (or nothing obvious).
I feel for dh but never draw attention to it because I think it is really sad. At first, I used to get annoyed because dh used to do so much for them when they were younger and was a great dad but it is what it is. Not expecting much from them but even a text message etc. would brighten his day. My younger dc makes much more of a fuss than my teenage one who really hasn't sorted much out either, annoyingly.