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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Daughter squirted a little juice over another buggy

464 replies

Millymollymandybestie · 15/06/2019 12:51

So I have just been to the park with my dd 3 and ds 20 months. Getting ready to leave and trying to put my buggy refusing ds in the buggy and he’s really struggling.

Dd has global development delay and suspected asd. I had her on her reigns looped over the buggy while I was sorting my son out. She was drinking a drink from a sports bottle and while I was turned away she squirted the empty buggy next to me. I said dd don’t do that and continued to get ds in buggy but moved dd away. And was going to dry the other buggy when they were both secure.

The owner of the buggy came over said to me - you just watched you daughter squirt that all over my buggy. I said I am sorry and I was trying to get ds in the buggy when she did it, and that moved dd out of way and dealing with dd before I Could sort out what mess she made. She said that wasn’t good enough. I said I’ve apologised and not much more I can do.

The way she was with me she was so rude- her mannerisms and tone. You could see I had tried to deal with the situation and you can tell my dd isn’t your average 3 year old. If it was me I would have just said don’t worry that’s what kids do ?

Stuff like this is one of the reasons dh hates taking the kids out.

Sorry rant over. It may seem like a silly little thing but I just don’t think there is any need to be rude

OP posts:
boobirdblue · 15/06/2019 19:55

Gosh, how fantastic. I must have been a terrible mother for giving mine the ice cream sitting on a bench and wiping their hands before putting them back in the buggy.

Not terrible bitumen over anxious about a buggy? What about all my other examples, you've ignored them?

boobirdblue · 15/06/2019 19:57

Bitumen = bit over the top

mathanxiety · 15/06/2019 19:59

It's not at all like a car though.

It's a vehicle designed specifically for a population that is expected to be doubly incontinent, messy, and often downright dirty.

You are not out to maximise the resale value.

SleepingStandingUp · 15/06/2019 19:59

You can't just let them damage property and then shrug it off saying they are only 3
Let suggests op sat and watched her child do it. She has said she didn't, that she saw it happen, moved kid and then tried to secure youngest so she could sort it out. But I'm sure all the perfect parents on here obsessed with a child maliciously damaging property for the fun of it are much more aware of what went on.

OneStepSideways · 15/06/2019 20:00

I think you should have made more fuss, eg told her off sharply then cleaned the buggy. I would have been cross if I saw a child squirt juice in my buggy and the mother notice but not do anything about it (the other child will have to sit in a wet sticky mess!)

magicfarawaytrees · 15/06/2019 20:01

Just because some of you don’t have any respect for things doesn’t mean you can do whatever you like to other people’s things.

FWIW a member of my family had full blown autism growing up. My mum didn’t use it as a get out card to let him do whatever he wanted. If anything that would have done them no favours whatsoever.

boobirdblue · 15/06/2019 20:02

think you should have made more fuss, eg told her off sharply then cleaned the buggy. I would have been cross if I saw a child squirt juice in my buggy and the mother notice but not do anything about it (the other child will have to sit in a wet sticky mess!)

I think you should keep your parenting style to yourself, the child has ANs and you know fuck all about them!

Sirzy · 15/06/2019 20:02

Telling an autistic child off “sharply” is in the vast majority of cases going to be completely counterproductive!

Sirzy · 15/06/2019 20:03

Full blown autism (?) growing up? What so he doesn’t have it as an adult now? Impressive Hmm

magicfarawaytrees · 15/06/2019 20:04

Erm obviously he still does. Don’t be daft

TheVanguardSix · 15/06/2019 20:04

Just because some of you don’t have any respect for things doesn’t mean you can do whatever you like to other people’s things.

I really, really, really don't think that is remotely what happened here.

yourelaughing · 15/06/2019 20:05

It's good that you apologized, if you cleaned the buggy after with tissues etc. then it's really just her attitude or just her having a bad day. Chin up! Always be prepared when bringing your kids out, some people are more emphatic than others.

magicfarawaytrees · 15/06/2019 20:05

I’m referring to some of the responses on here, not necessarily the OP.

Goldmandra · 15/06/2019 20:05

Just because some of you don’t have any respect for things doesn’t mean you can do whatever you like to other people’s things.

Please show me where the OP has said she allowed her DD to do whatever she liked 🤔

magicfarawaytrees · 15/06/2019 20:06

And repeat...

SleepingStandingUp · 15/06/2019 20:07

So the other mum was quite rightly annoyed watching the kid still standing there holding the bottle and able to squirt again SHE MOVED HER DAUGHTER AWAY

Why did the OP need to dry the other buggy if it was just a few drops? so if your child only squirted a few drops of juice on someone else's pushchair, you'd have just left it? How rude you are.

DecomposingComposers · 15/06/2019 20:07

It's a vehicle designed specifically for a population that is expected to be doubly incontinent, messy, and often downright dirty.

You are not out to maximise the resale value.

Well, my 2 didn't get doubly incontinent in their pram, didn't spill drink or food in it, didn't make it messy or dirty. We just cleaned them up before they got in the pram and they didn't eat in there.

If you parented differently then that's great. It's your choice. The issue with the situation in the OP is that it wasn't the other mum's choice.

Newyearbollocks · 15/06/2019 20:16

The number of people that would get hard up over a bit of juice is a little concerning tbh Hmm

NewAccount270219 · 15/06/2019 20:18

Two things I find weird:

  1. how many people want the OP to tell off her child even though she won't understand - so, basically, to scare her so that she can do the right performance in front of other parents.
  2. that so many people think that OP should be completely in control of her DD with special needs and be able to command her at all times, but if the special needs mean a child won't sit in a wet buggy that's insurmountable. Either you think a child should be compliant no matter what their needs are or you don't.
Original poster
Millymollymandybestie · 15/06/2019 20:21

Omg this thread has turned crazy.
I don’t use asd or gdd ad a get out of jail card. I included it to give a bit of background.

People are actually just reading what they want from my post and making up changing the rest.

It’s comical really

OP posts:
TanMateix · 15/06/2019 20:23

The other woman didn’t know your DD has a development delay, from her perspective, she was only and you let her get on with it.

I do think however that if it had been my child, I would have stopped whatever I was doing and go and apologise straight away and help her clean the buggy, you may have been having a bad day but she could have too, and as somebody said above, she had to put her child on a buggy wet with juice. I think it was your apparent lack of concern what made that mother act as she did.

CrohnicallyEarly · 15/06/2019 20:24

@DecomposingComposers

I obviously parented wrong then. Like I said upthread, there was the time on holiday when my small baby (just being weaned) suddenly did the most humongous runny poo that shot out of the back of her nappy and filled (literally) the seat of the buggy.

There’s also the time as a toddler that she randomly threw up down herself, and the buggy. It was interesting trying to get the lumps of banana out of the buckle clips. At least when she did it as a newborn, it was just milk and mainly over the washable cover.

She makes my second child’s habit of blowing raspberries and drooling over the shoulder straps seem positively civilised in comparison.

Original poster
Millymollymandybestie · 15/06/2019 20:24

lilybud you don’t seem very nice. I wasn’t doing that to my ds he was planking so making it really difficult to get in .

OP posts:
FormerlyFrikadela01 · 15/06/2019 20:25

thinks back fondly to the on-holiday poonami that ended with the entire buggy being dumped in the shower

I'll never forget the top and tail Korma nappy that led us to discover that a jet wash works a charm on a pushchair. Grin

magicfarawaytrees · 15/06/2019 20:29

OP why have you posted in the first place then if you are so adamant you were completely correct? Do you only want positive responses?