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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Wibu - poolside dispute

192 replies

HolidaySun1 · 07/06/2019 19:35

On holiday in a sunny country. Me and son were playing nicely in the pool. For info my 5 year old is autistic and hates water on his face but had been in the pool while it was quiet and done really well. It got busier so we came out and were on chairs near pool having an ice cream and drink.

Older kids (10 to 12ish) were in pool with massive super soakers. Lots of people relaxing by poolside looked annoyed as they were sumbathing. They were spraying each other and everyone else and got my son (not in pool) in the face. He was upset so we moved further back. While I was tending to him they got me and I have to say even being several foot from the pool it stung. I nicely said "keep the water in the pool kids" when they aimed and hit me and son in the face again. I asked them to stop shooting while we moved and they then hit my son again with the super soaker and it went directly in his eye and he became very distressed. I told my son we should go to the apartment because of the kids when a woman by me (assumedly the mum but I don't know this and didn't realise they were together) started shouting at me that they were just kids having fun, what did I expect by the pool, that I was rude about the kids.
I explained that they had repeatedly shot my son.
She screamed at me that I was being ridiculous, they are kids on holiday, stop being stupid. I was embarrassed, but replied, "once would be an accident, several times is deliberate and the kids should be told to stop and they are inconsiderate and rude".
She carried on shouting, I said I would not argue and shout in front of kids and took my son away. She shouted after that if she sees us again by the pool she'll push us both in and called me an uptight bitch.
Son was upset when we got back but is ok now but I feel very angry but also intimidated (and shakey and embarrassed) and worried about the rest of our holiday here. It's just me and my son, I know if I had other adults with me I would feel better but just us here in a foreign country...
Was I uptight? Should I have not said anything at all and just left? I thought the super soaker kids were out of order but perhaps it's normal and I'm over protective?

OP posts:

Sayyestothecake · 07/06/2019 20:52

I would speak to the manager not the pool bar guy.
Pools are for everyone and a bit of splashing to be expected but fucking deliberately shooting people in the face with super soakers, they are really quite powerful is not on at all.

Bookworm4 · 07/06/2019 20:56

Most pools at holiday hotels abroad don’t allow super soakers/water guns, some don’t even allow inflatables. I’d definitely speak to your rep and/or hotel management. She threatened you which could get her booted from hotel. Well done for standing up to this vile excuse for a mother.

SusieOwl4 · 07/06/2019 20:59

Definitely you were in the right. If I had seen my children do that I would have stopped them straight away . Its rude and inconsiderate and personally I would not let her and her children ruin my holiday .

poopypants · 07/06/2019 21:02

It's not really a wonder her dc are so awful and out of control.

Original poster

HolidaySun1 · 07/06/2019 21:15

Thank you so much, I totally doubted myself and thought maybe I'd over reacted and that I was over sensitive because of ds and his issues. It means alot that you all think I wasn't unreasonable.

OP posts:

FunnyHappyGirl · 07/06/2019 21:15

What a total bitch! I'd have ended up saying or doing something I later regretted ie pushing mum in to a pool fully clothed

You were definitely not BU. Stupid cow should have a thought for people other than herself. Typical selfish attitude of a lot of people nowadays unfortunately.

Enjoy the rest of your holiday OP and if you were to accidentally trip whilst walking past her poolside I wouldn't worry too much if you had to try and steady yourself while pushing her in to the water OOPS!

HoneycombAndAJackass · 07/06/2019 21:22

What are the odds that this is the woman who wanted to take super soakers to the kids party that time? (The rude Mum,Not you OP)

MotherOfDragonite · 07/06/2019 21:22

Well, it sounds like that's where they get their bad manners!

Is this the pool at the hotel where you are staying? If so I would have a word with the manager to let them know about what happened.

Original poster

HolidaySun1 · 07/06/2019 21:28

Yes pool is at our hotel. We have fallen into a beautiful routine of breakfast, beach, walk, pool, nap, dinner and kids disco then bed. It's been perfect and the pool is great for a cool down after out walk and losing that last bit of energy before our nap. Also ds has gained so much confidence in the water (although we swim in the sea too!) I just don't like changing because of someone else, it feels like teaching ds to give into the bullies and we'll still see them at mealtimes and the disco as it's a small complex.

OP posts:

allthegoodusernameshavegone · 07/06/2019 21:28

It is irritating that pp are asking the hotel staff to deal with these issues.

Bobbins1 · 07/06/2019 21:31

I would absolutely complain to the hotel staff, you shouldn’t be made to feel like that & good work standing up to her to start with!

HomeMadeMadness · 07/06/2019 21:33

It is irritating that pp are asking the hotel staff to deal with these issues.

Why is that irritating? Surely that's part of their job, so that the guests can enjoy the use of the facilities.

EleanorOalike · 07/06/2019 21:34

The woman threatened to push a 5 year old autistic child and his mother into the water and was verbally abusive. The OP and her child are now afraid and having to change their routine because of the actions of another guest in the hotel. Why shouldn’t the staff be alerted to this?

For a start, super soakers should be banned by management. OP can’t make this happen, the staff have the power to make this happen.

MorondelaFrontera · 07/06/2019 21:35

It is irritating that pp are asking the hotel staff to deal with these issues.

Well some posters will advise to call the local police and local social services, but that would be a bit much.

EffYouSeeKaye · 07/06/2019 21:54

YANBU. Tell her to get stuffed. Don’t let it stop you enjoying the pool or your holiday. It’s important to show your son how to stand up to bullies.

TheRedBarrows · 07/06/2019 21:56

Well, it’s obvious where her kids get their rude inconsiderate loutish behaviour from!

YANBU and I hope you and your son can now relax and enjoy yourselves.

Likethebattle · 07/06/2019 22:30

Stand your ground and be aware of she is near you, yes she can push you in but you can grab her and take her down too. Then you ate obviously scared of deep water so have to keep pushing her under as you need to use her to float (obviously stop before she drowns but bullies deserve what they get!) x

Ruru8thestars · 07/06/2019 22:35

Tell manager and let them sort it

CottonSock · 07/06/2019 22:42

Yanbu, i hate being squirted. My dd2 has chronic severe ear problems and as a result a real medical need to keep her ears dry. She's also scared due to lack of exposure to a splashy pool environment. I've told kids before not to splash her and why. Luckily kids were decent and understood. Otherwise I'd report to staff.

Sayyestothecake · 07/06/2019 22:55

allgood are you for real, of course people expect the hotel staff to deal with this.

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 07/06/2019 23:08

Of course this is a matter for the hotel! If there was an unruly drunk causing mayhem in the bar you'd expect the management/security to step in. I don't see how this is any different. Surely there is a lifeguard watching the pool, they can order kids out of the pool for dangerous play.

YANBU.

janetforpresident · 07/06/2019 23:24

Nowt to do with the holiday rep!

There will be a rep who's speaks fluently in both languages and they are there to help English speaking guests get help with problems. I mean it is literally the point of a rep.

It is irritating that pp are asking the hotel staff to deal with these issues Why? Do you think the hotel staff want a brawl between 2 guests or an amicable solution enforced by staff. If the hotel staff say "no super soakers" then i am fairly sure that will be the end of the matter. Why should the op feel she has to ruin her holiday with a nasty confrontation?

Queenoftheashes · 07/06/2019 23:42

The hotel management have sold a certain environment presumably an enjoyable one for paying guests. They need to enforce this by telling little twats with super soakers to fuck off.

PregnantSea · 08/06/2019 00:11

The woman has sworn at her, called her names and threatened to push her and her 5 yr old autistic son in the pool. Why on earth shouldn't OP tell the hotel manager about this?

Purpletigers · 08/06/2019 00:17

You’re not being unreasonable. Speak to the staff. Sounds like the children are as rude as their mother .

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