To ask those in food service to please take requests for decaf seriously?

[EveryDayImHustlin]

Ok before anyone says it, I know I could just not drink tea/coffee at all, and most of the time I don’t, but I love the taste and occasionally I really fancy a cup. And decaf exists for a reason right?

I’ve never been able to handle caffeine and it started giving me terrible headaches and migraines in my early twenties, so I gave it up for good. I can handle the small amounts in chocolate but have to be careful not to have too much (really dark chocolate especially can trigger something if I have more than a square or two) but tea/coffee/coke/Red Bull etc are completely out.

Anyway, on several occasions recently I’ve found myself ordering a decaf tea or coffee, triple checking with the person serving that it’s definitely decaf (usually getting an eye roll for doing so) and then winding up with a thumping headache an hour later anyway.

I was especially annoyed today because we ordered from a place that’s meant to be particularly good on allergens etc, and yet my ‘decaf’ coffee definitely wasn’t.

If you work in any kind of food service, AIBU to ask that you actually give someone decaf if they ask for it?!

Op I totally agree with you.

High levels of caffeine irritate my bladder as I suffer with intistitial cystitis.

If I have a 'normal' coffee I'll be on the loo all day feeling like a flame torch is going up my peepee.

I get so many people including staff at coffee shops rolling their eyes when I say I need to have decaf. But why? Why does it bother anyone else?

YANBU

I repeat the order back to the customer. I make the drink and serve it saying the name of the drink. Not on this thread but have read on a different one how irritating doing that is.

stucknoue

That’s really interesting, I also can’t handle pseudoephedrine although I’m fine with codeine!

It may not be just the caffeine that triggers your headaches. Tannins can also be a trigger.

Yes I can’t have caffeine as I have the most horrendous headache condition from it. A lot of places don’t have decaf i find.

Op, i honestly dont believe this happens as often as you suggest. You even said you know which side of costa machines they use and mention "the purple handle"? I can imagine how frustrating it must be to have a customer hovering over watching you work. Its easy to make a mistake when you have that kind of pressure.
Apologies but i nor anyone i know with allergy problems seem to have this issue as you do. Again, maybe think about always mentioning an allergy or not asking so much

MsFenellaFielding if you gave me my coffee while saying ‘decaf latte’ then I would be delighted and I wouldn’t feel the need to double check. Sorry if I made it sound like I would repeatedly question the person serving me, as I explained above that’s not what I mean! Just that if it’s not clear that they’ve understood my request then I would want to clarify.

I’m not a dickhead customer and I’ve served plenty of coffees myself, I just want people to understand that decaf can be a medical requirement and isn’t just someone being fussy!

You even said you know which side of costa machines they use and mention "the purple handle"? I can imagine how frustrating it must be to have a customer hovering over watching you work. Its easy to make a mistake when you have that kind of pressure.

Haha oh come on, I’m not hovering over the barista! I’m waiting at the end of the counter where the coffee machine is, like everyone else. And I know about the purple handle because my friend works in Costa and told me that this is how they make sure they’re always serving decaf when asked. I used that as an example of how it’s sometimes obvious that they have given me the wrong thing (because they should easily be able to tell which they’re serving)

I love how people are determined to make me sound like some kind of caffeine-free dragon who terrorises baristas though.

Yanbu. I'm surprised though, as I only drink decaff because of anxiety and bp and I always watch them make it, and they always open a separate packet (Neros) and usually check back with me "decaff, right?" And I've never had a bad reaction.

Its not how you know about the purple handle, its the fact that you use the knowledge as a way to watch them make your drink. A lot of people say "I have a dairy allergy..." or "Im allergic to xxx..." when placing the order. This is so those serving know the seriousness. Why dont you do that? I know you explained the triple checking but before that it did sound like a controlling thing which can put people under pressure while working

Also, the way your wrote you posts made it out like they are deliberately giving you full caffeine which is why people made the jokes about them "poisoning".

I’ve been ordering decaf for 15 years and in that time I’ve got used to the general ‘routine’ that this seems to involve, normally meaning that they open a little sachet of decaf coffee rather than just using the beans that are permanently feeding into the machine. So yes, I can usually sense that something might be up if my coffee comes too quickly. I’m talking about places like costa or Starbucks when they’re making it right there in front of you, obviously if I’m sitting in a cafe I don’t insist on going up behind the counter to breathe down their necks and make sure they do it right!

I’m not hovering but you do get to know what to look out for, in the same way that you’d be suspicious and might query it if you ordered soy milk and saw them pouring your milk out of a Graham’s Dairy jug.

the way your wrote you posts made it out like they are deliberately giving you full caffeine

I repeatedly said that I don’t think it’s deliberate but that I don’t think people take the request seriously enough or realise that it can come from a medical need, that’s all!

And I only feel the need to make sure because of all the times when I didn’t check and ended up feeling ill...

This thread is basically confirming the feeling I already had which is that I just shouldn’t risk it. A shame because as I said right at the start, decaf surely exists for a reason? But if people think it’s unreasonable to want to be able to rely on that then I guess I will just resign myself to never having a delicious gingerbread latte again 😭

might query it if you ordered soy milk and saw them pouring your milk out of a Graham’s Dairy jug

Honestly, ive been drinking soy/almond or other dairy free in my lattes for last 3 years and my sister for much longer and never had a instance where they didnt give me what i ordered. It just seems like you must be having bad luck to constantly be getting the wrong drink- specially at places like Costas and Starbuck as they have a lot of options.

Jamhandprints I don’t go to Nero now but I used to live near one and thinking back, I don’t think I ever had a problem there. They even used to make me decaf frappes which are my absolute favourite 🤤 maybe I need to find one here!

The worst offender for me has been Starbucks, and the cafe in the building where I work.

realise that it can come from a medical need, that’s all

I think it's patronising to assume people dont realise a dietary choice could come from a medical need. But as i said before, just say that you have an allergy so they definitely realise it because of medical purposes.

Honestly, ive been drinking soy/almond or other dairy free in my lattes for last 3 years and my sister for much longer and never had a instance where they didnt give me what i ordered.

Right but... that’s my point. I would like requests for decaf to be taken as seriously as requests for dairy free. If that makes sense?

Costa are generally ok for me although I did have one woman argue that I hadn’t asked for decaf (I definitely did, obviously) and try to make me take the regular one so she wouldn’t have to make it again, which is the kind of thing I mean where it’s sometimes viewed as a preference rather than a requirement. That was a one off though and generally my local Costa aren’t too bad.

So the op is being accused of being controlling because she watches to make sure that they don't make an error that clearly is being made? and in doing that forces them to make an error?
That's ridiculous.

Caffeine makes me poorly too and I often have to correct orders that don't get passed on properly.

I wonder where you are in the U.K. OP? I live in London and 8 or 9 years ago this was a definite issue for me. Once in a while I’d be given caffeinated instead of decaf and I’d be shaking and stuttering within an hour. Thankfully over the years it has got much better and I cannot remember the last time it happened.

I think it's patronising to assume people dont realise a dietary choice could come from a medical need. But as i said before, just say that you have an allergy so they definitely realise it because of medical purposes.

Genuine question, when you order soy do you always say ‘because I can’t have dairy’ or do you just feel confident that you’ll get soy because that’s what you’ve asked for?

Because I would just really be able to ask for decaf and know I’ll get decaf. But that just isn’t remotely guaranteed (and from the replies on this thread I’m obviously not the only one!)

YANBU. I love coffee, love the flavour, but get very jittery and upset stomach from too much. And it affects my sleep. But I still drink it and decaf is a treat. I also find some cafes better than others at taking care with what they’re serving. I can usually tell within 5 minutes if they haven’t given me the decaf I’ve asked for by which time it’s too late.

So which cafes/chains are the best at honouring decaf orders?

It may be easier to switch to anothe beverage that can't be confused.

Herbal tea maybe? I can't drink too much caffeine, it cuts confusion altogether by ordering a peppermint or fruit tea.

at the poster who said that herbal teas are as nice as regular coffee or tea. Er, no they're not, they're on a different planet, and they're not even tea.

whyohwhyowhydididoit I’m in London too but I only moved here a few years ago, used to be up North. Thinking about it, I actually don’t think I ever had this problem when I lived elsewhere, maybe baristas in London are just more rushed off their feet!

Definitely not being unreasonable! I'm really feeling this right now, I've got a heart condition and stopped drinking caffeine nearly 10 years ago when I was diagnosed. I had a 'decaf' coffee around 6pm today which definitely wasn't decaf, I'm still having palpitations on and off now. It's annoying because I do like coffee. I think most of the time it's done accidentally by someone making a regular coffee on autopilot, rather than that they can't be bothered or have run out of decaf or whatever. But it's like accidentally giving somebody with a nut allergy something with nuts in, it can have severe health consequences for some people. I don't think you'd say somebody with a nut allergy was being unreasonable for taking a risk and eating out, and should just never eat out. Requests for decaf should be treated as seriously as requests for food without nuts (or whatever allergen) in.

speakout I have about 20 different Pukka varieties in my kitchen and I normally order peppermint tea when I’m out, I only get a latte maybe once every few weeks as a treat but might have to give that up