If a 7 year old child disclosed this to you...

[redredbrine]

AIBU for quick traffic

what would your immediate actions be?

• they are scared of their dad
• they don't want to go to their dads because he shouts
• their dad is aggressive and angry and breaks things when they do something wrong
• that they're sad that daddy broke up with his girlfriend because that means they have to be on their own with him
• that their dad pinned them down with his foot and wouldn't let them move even though they were upset
• that they are scared to talk to mummy about it because they don't want daddy to shout at mummy (they're not together)
• daddy breaks their toys when he's angry
• daddy uses swear works
• daddy says nasty things about mummy
• I wish I didn't have to go there

@Mooey89 it's really sad. She's desperate it seems not to go back. She talked about moving to Australia then he wouldn't be able to find her.

She's crying out for help. This is utterly terrifying for her. Please help her and have a duty of care to the child you are in charge of. Social services and NSPCC

Aside from the official reporting, I would reassure the child they have done the right thing in talking to you and that you will keep them safe.
I don't care whether that's the right or wrong thing, but if a 7 year old trusted me enough to say all that then I'd regard it as my duty not to risk placing a child in an environment they are scared of.

I would call the nspcc, this is exactly why they exist. They'll advise you on the best course of action.

and that you will keep them safe.

No, you can't say that as you can't promise anything. It might not happen.

I'd show the mother and report to the local multi agency hub.

I would speak to mom urgently.

But write down everything this 7yr old said, noting as much detail as possible, including the time of day this discussion happened, and how it came about.
I wouldn’t ask the 7yr old any questions, but I would give her lots of cuddles and reassure her that telling you was very brave and completely the right thing to do.

Depending what mom said would probably influence my decision on whether to call children’s services now or not.

Do you know their address, full name and DOB of 7yr old?

Write it down too. You may forget the actual words the child used, and things you said that might've triggered the disclosure. It's important to get the facts correct where there's a safeguarding issue (and there is in this case) and use the childs own words not just general drift of convo.

Every local authority has an online safeguarding portal - it's easy to google. Then you can either fill in an online form or you can telephone child protection. It sounds like this child needs support.

As a teacher one of those on their own would result in me referring it to my safeguarding lead.

As a casual babysitter I'd call the NSPCC see what they have to say.

As a teacher one of those on their own would result in me referring it to my safeguarding lead.

Same here, apart from perhaps the swear words - depending what they were and how they were used. Shit when he trod on a piece of lego is very different to 'you f idiot' directed at the child.

The mum needs to know so she can protect her child. Please tell her, she then needs to get social services involved who can also speak to you about the disclosure.

Please report as well as talking to mum if you think she will be sensible.
Social services may not take her seriously but your independent info will build a picture. Do it now. She may be sent to dad anytime.
Then tell the child you have called for help. Give her childline and nspcc number and encourage to find someone at school to talk to in case you are nudged out.
Good luck. Let us know how you get on

Speak to her mum, but also report it to ss/children's social care/mash yourself - it will have more weight coming from you directly than from the mum.

Definitely don't make any promises you can't keep like "keeping her safe".

Definitley tell her mum. Poor kid!

You need to contact either the NSPCC or Social Services Children and Familes Department urgently, whether or not you speak to the mum and whatever she says. (I have worked in this area for many years and have a lot of child protection training and experience). It is your duty (and everyone's duty, whatever their role in the child's life, professional or not) to do this.

Report it.
(And she may have not even told you all of it. )

I would talk to the Mum asap, but would assume that the Mum must know of the horrible temperament of this guy.

I would go straight to your local MASH or similar. Don’t bother with NSPCC unless you feel the response from children’s services is inadequate.

Report first. Social services will speak to mum and try to support her. Tell her after by all means. Child is first priority

"Solicitor said court unlikely to stop contact on this basis."

Why would that be?

The assumption that the child is lying?

I thought that contact was supposed to be about the child?

Well she has made a disclosure of being abused so social services straight away.

Be prepared for the mum to say it’s nonsense.

Write it all down and report it to social services. Provide the mum with a copy of the information you've sent so that she can get her solicitor to go urgently to family court asking for CAFCASS to assess whether or not the child is safe visiting her father. Give the child the number for childline and tell her she can call them herself for advice any time, it's 0800 1111. Poor kid.

What are you going to do, OP? Because it needs to be more than just telling her mum.