I am older than most of you and used dating sites way before they went online. Newspaper sites (We had to write actual letters and put stamps on them and put them in the post box with a box number. lol)
I have always expected/chosen to go Dutch on first meetings. I haven't always insisted. If I was happy to see them again and they insisted on paying I would go along with it but ensure I paid next time.
The only occasion I broke my rule
He suggested a meal, I suggested a drink but he 'really wanted to go for a meal', he was racist and elitist during the meal as well as ordering for me (I corrected that and told the waitress what I really wanted ... which was cheaper than his suggestion) and he ordered a stupidly expensive bottle of wine.
Forgive me
I let him pay
This was I think in the mid 90s
One guy in the noughties, turned up on foot, 'I thought you could drop me home, I only live a couple of miles away'. - I went to the bar for the second drink and somehow found myself outside ... in my car ... going home alone.
Another guy came in full leathers on a huge bike (not a problem) Both his front teeth were missing, he had bad breath, I bought the first drink, he finished before me, then I finished and suggested another one, he waved his glass at me – I bought a second drink and when finished I said I had to get back for the baby sitter – ‘So when are we meeting again?’ he said. ‘I don’t think we’re suited’ I said. I got a mouthful of abuse amongst which was ‘I had led him on’ and ‘you say you want equality but you only want it on your terms’ WTF.
I could write a book as the saying goes.
I still keep dipping my toe in the water but very quickly withdraw it. There is no investment in the responses these days. Click and connect, click and forget. It seems that the lack of effort needed leads to instant forgetfulness.