AIBU to get my 14 year old on the Pill.

[Campervanlife4me]

She has had a boyfriend for 6 months now and is a little bit irresponsible at times. She's lovely and kind but just doesn't always think things through. She asked me if she could go on the pill because of her periods. I talked to her about it and about being too young to have sex and everything else that comes with it, but then as I thought about it later, I thought that maybe it would be more sensible for her to be on the pill than end up having an unwanted pregnancy. I can't be with her all the time to make sure she doesn't do anything stupid, so would I be unreasonable to agree to letting her go on the pill to be safe?

Idk about the contraceptive side but I used the combined pill because of very irregular periods. It makes such a difference to know when you're likely to have a period and not feel constant anxiety about being caught out.

I think the implant might be better. Forgetting to take my pill is what led me to being pregnant.

Me and my cousin were both on the pill at that age.

Injection is not that suitable for that age group as it can thin their bones and affect bone density.

I'm with other posters, you getting her on contraception isn't going to encourage her to have sex - she's going to do that anyway if that's what she wants to do.

I also agree with injection / implant - if not very responsible, can't be relied upon to remember the pill.

I’d do some research first. There has been a massive increase in teens taking birth control. Just a quick google does bring up a fair amount of information. A lot about increased risk of depression. Have a read of the info on this website. www.menstruationresearch.org/2015/09/08/why-young-teens-need-real-periods-not-the-pill/

I went on the pill at 14 to help with my periods, I was also in a relationship, I understood that the pill wouldn’t protect me from catching anything (they do teach you this in sex Ed). I think if it was my dd I would rather she was protected against pregnancy, a condom can split. Just talk to her and remind her that condoms are important.

I'd say the implant is ideal in this case - it will see her through those tricky years where even the most sensible and responsible teens are not THAT reliable.

I thought that maybe it would be more sensible for her to be on the pill than end up having an unwanted pregnancy. I can't be with her all the time to make sure she doesn't do anything stupid, so would I be unreasonable to agree to letting her go on the pill to be safe?

I've got a DD(14) and wouldn't be encouraging her to go on the pill. Dd knows the age of consent is 14 for good reasons. She knows how important barrier methods of contraception are. If your DD can be irresponsible sometimes, maybe work on this with her.

Agreed with PP’s that injection/implant is a better option. If she’s ‘irresponsible’ then she’s likely to forget to take the pill. The implant can also help with periods if she has particularly heavy ones.

Op you also need to remind her of the age of consent. How old is her boyfriend?
She is still technically a child, and two years underage...

My dd is 14 very mature and sensible for her age is nowhere near ready for a full on sexual relationship. Your dd will be sexually active from a young age, I would be delighted she was talking to me, but her age would be a big concern.

Perking I assume you had a typo as the age of consent is 16, not 14 in the UK.

Being on hormonal contraceptive also reduces teenage girls sports injuries as it evens out hormonal fluctuations.

I went on the implant at 16 - for birth control reasons and it was fab. Never had to worry about forgetting to take it and didn't have a panic if I was I'll. Lasted for 3 years I think, I then got it replaced another twice before getting it removed to have my DD. I never even had a pregnancy scare on the implant whereas my friends had several scares and 1 actually fell pregnant

Sorry pressed post too soon - my friend were all on the pill (all different versions)

I was on the pill early, 11-12 I think because my periods were so heavy and painfull, I didn't have sex until I was 17 so I don’t think being on the pill will encourage a girl to have sex (the same way as not being on it wouldn’t encourage her not to have sex).

I took the pill when I was 14- it was for period reasons rather than sex though, but it seems the sensible thing to do

I don't think 14 is too young to be reliable to remember to take it- it has the days on the packet, so even if unsure you can check if DD has taken it for the day

The implant wasn't widely (if at all?) available when I was 14, 10 years ago, but I still don't think I'd want a big commitment like that at that age. Plus I think I would've found it quite scary having that rod in my arm at a young age. Maybe injection would be a sensible route if you are worried about her forgetting to take it

I had the implant in at an older age, I hated it, it made me a mardy, moody, stubborn, spoilt twat with everyone and I was an awful person to be around, it took 3 months of persistent dr's and hospital appointments to take it out- they don't mess around with the implant, when its in its in.

Most modern contraceptive pills have a 12hr window.

The implant and the depo are both progesterone only methods. As a PP has said, the depo isn’t advised for teenagers as it is associated with bone density issues. The implant doesn’t have that side effect/risk factor but has a high rate of spotting/bleeding as a side effect. Around 50% of women using the implant (and the depo) will experience irregular bleeding. It isn’t recommended as a treatment for period issues. Generally the treatment for period problems, if it comes in the form of a contraceptive, comes in the form of combined oral contraceptive (teens and young women) or mirena coil (in older women or women who’ve given birth).

Use of the pill in young women doesn’t increase promiscuity. However, I do agree that it is important to push the importance of condoms, in terms of STD prevention.

I had the implant at 17. Had a horrible effect on me. Wish I’d stayed on the pill - started that at 15.

Look, if your DD is going to have sex she is going to do it regardless. You are not "encouraging" her by telling her to go on the pill, your taking precautions. I teach at a secondary school and they are doing a lot more things than they're parents are aware of. Even if she is having sex, as long as it is consensual and she is being sensible and she is happy and she is in a relationship there are more important things in the world to be worried about.

Plus when I was 14 I had ridiculously heavy periods, I would bleed through several times a day, sometimes onto class chairs etc. So if it is for a period reason I sympathise with your daughter and I would be pro contraception

All very well, but is she responsible enough to remember to take it regularly?

Obviously, it is important to be having the chat about her age, consent and relationships but please don’t ignore the flip side. Sometimes young people do decide to have sex.

Around 50% of women using the implant (and the depo) will experience irregular bleeding

That's true but it is usually temporary. As a GP, I would be encouraging your DD to consider the implant. Most young women struggle to remember to take the pill regularly - I certainly did .
I'd say roughly 8/10 of my patients on the implant get on really well with it.

If she prefers a pill, get her to set up an alarm on her phone as a reminder to take it every day.

My DSS has got the implant and she was 14 when she had it. I think her mum did the right thing and I would have done the same if she was mine. We know she’s had sex once and hope she won’t again for a while but as PP have said, you can’t watch them all the time.

*DSD

I would.