To cut my nose off to spite my face just to make a point? Work related.

[QueenofmyPrinces]

I’m feeling so torn about something that’s happening at work....

I’m a nurse and for the last 6 months I’ve been starting to implement a massive change to one of the services that we provide and it has got the potential to be something really amazing. It involves new policies being written, new care plans being created and it means giving some teaching to other members of staff and doctors - in other departments as well as my own. I’m doing it alongside my Manager but it’s my “baby” as such and implementing it and all the changes that go along with it is definitely above my pay grade. However, it’s something I’m really passionate about and so I have thrown myself into it.

A month or so ago there came an opportunity for a promotion so myself and two other nurses went for it. I was by far the most experienced and maybe I naively thought that all the work I’d been doing on the new project would earn me a step up the pay scale.

However, they gave the position to another nurse and although I really get on with him, he’s been qualified 10 years less than me, and is not particularly thought highly of by other staff in a professional capacity. As a person he’s a really nice guy, I socialise with him out of work sometimes with other colleagues and I generally have nothing against him.

I was understandably very hurt though when he got the job over me and although I know NHS interviews are points based and so he obviously said more buzz words in the interview than I did but it still feels so unfair.

My issue is that my Manager has been in touch to ask how far along I’ve gotten with implementing the new changes to the service that I’ve been working on and asking when we can meet up to discuss what my next steps are to getting the changes put into practice.

I honestly feel like telling her I’m done with it and that if I’m not deemed to be “senior staff material” then why should I be doing all this work for her benefit?

It sounds really petty I know. It just feels like I’m being taken advantage of and if there’s no reward or recognition for any of this work I’ve been doing then what’s the point?

I feel like telling her to have her newly appointed senior staff member do it because I don’t see why I should put myself out anymore (I know how childish I sound).

It’s so hard because it’s a project I’m passionate about but at the same time I just feel so angry.

My DH absolutely thinks I should tell them to shove it.

But am I cutting off my nose to spite my face by no longer doing something I’m passionate about just to make a point?

I don’t know. I feel confused and torn.

Wow, great update, Carpe DIem OP!

I bet you feel great now , having siezed the initiative and done that :-)

Good move OP - the consultant will almost certainly talk to your manager about it, and if nothing else it will tell her that you're determined

Well done @QueenofmyPrinces, that's exactly the right approach. Fingers crossed for you.

Great update OP, well done. Fingers crossed for you.

Yes and it will tell her that since it’s your project, you have no problem claiming your work as yours and taking credit for it despite her attempts to marginalise you.

I see a bright side to this! I’m watching and learning

Fantastic!

I’m not sure my Manager will be very delighted when she finds out I’ve done it.....

Good job!!! I’m so proud of you!!!

I really hope it works out. You gave her a chance to make you feel better and she did the opposite. Well done for taking charge of the situation.

I’m quickly realising that if I want something then I’m going to have to go out there and get it instead of passively waiting for opportunities to find me!

Really brave OP, and something I definitely need to take on board in my working life. Best of luck and hope it's good news!

I'm not so sure that was a brilliant move, tbh. Even if such a role was created, there is no way that you would get it just because you proposed it. It would be advertised. Secondly, that Consultant is not going to be involved in recruiting the nurse. Thirdly, you have just demonstrated that you can't receive feedback, because you've gone over your Manager's head. I could go on but I won't.

I'm amazed that essentially sticking 2 fingers up at your Manager in such an open way is being applauded. All I can think is that those posters don't work in NHS nursing.

I agree with Lougle I'm afraid.

Consultants have no say at all in anything to do with nursing appointments.

I am well aware that he can’t hire me

And yes, I am fully aware that if a role were considered to be beneficial it would be advertised publically, not just given to me.

At least then though I would have e a recognised role I could apply for which I should better than where I am now - doing the work for no recognition and for someone else’s benefit.

If a role was advertised and I applied and I didn’t get it then fair enough, that way I would know how the land lies and I could think about my next steps, I.e looking to move elsewhere.

But something has got to change because the situation I’m currently in is not making me happy and I’m not going to just let people walk all over me because they don’t think I have the balls to say that what’s happening isn’t fair.

Life is too short to not try and make things happen for myself. My Manager is quite content to look out for number one and so there’s no reason why I shouldn’t do the same.

I don't understand how you think it's unfair, tbh. 3 applicants for one role. The best one on the day gets it. Just because it's an internal recruitment, doesn't mean they can make their decision on 'what they think of you and all you've done'. They have to have a fair benchmarking process. I've interviewed in another public sector role more times than I can count. There were occasions when we thought an applicant would be an absolute diamond and get the role, but they have a shocking interview and didn't get it. You can't say 'oh well, she did better, but she should get the role anyway...'

You didn't do as well as the other guy. Perhaps he was more prepared. Perhaps he wasn't complacent. Perhaps he spent time researching band 6 issues or trust priorities. That makes him smart.

When I had to give a presentation on a specific issue, for an application for a specialist course, I got data from a specific person on the way that issue affected both sites of our Trust, then used that to compare why there was a difference. I also looked back at previous audits of both sites to establish what the historical picture was, then took my own data of the current situation, and used that to form an argument for how we as a Trust needed to move forward.

You have to be strategic and show an awareness of the 'big picture'.

Do come back and let us know how you get on. I'm not sure her manager can be too unhappy , she knows she went for the job didn't get it , the reality is if people want to move onwards and upwards then they may try to make things happen themselves.

I’d consider writing an email to your manager, cc’ing in her boss, confirming what you discussed at your meeting today and how you are concerned that you weren’t given any assurance that you’ll be given as requested (a) time during working hours to attend to the project work she expects you to do and (b) the opportunity to attend the meetings with the specialist team, by for example them committing to not scheduling them for your non-working days. I’d call it an informal grievance.

Queen I have seen a few of your posts and you seem to be a bit self centred and unable to see anything from other people's point of view. I think you are misrepresenting the situation, as in your first posts you loved the project and it was your baby, you had suggested it etc, now when you haven't received a promotion it has been thrust on you and it's basically slave labour. The promotion and this project are separate issues but you think they are one and the same

@Treesthemovie As your post is directly under mine, for a second I thought you were talking about me... which does fit into your “self-centred” claim somewhat

It is slave labour though as she is doing it in her own time for no pay

@1vandal2 - that's the NHS for you

Surely the OP could have asked for time to do the project work at the start though ?

I agree with Trees one minute it was your project and you were fully on board.
Then when you didnt get the job they are forcing you to do it.
You have had some great advice if you want to go for a Band 6 but I doubt you will listen which is really your main problem.

Agree Op has had some excellent advice on here, from many higher grade NHS staff who have been really helpful.

You don't seem as passionate about this project, as it hasn't helped towards your promotion.

I have received an email from my Manager (she knows I check my work emails from home) asking if I can come in thirty minutes earlier tomorrow as there’s something she needs to discuss with me.