To be struggling with work and nursery runs

[cheesemixup]

So I've finally managed to cut my hours down from work I now do 9.30-5.
My partner takes ds to nursery at 12.
Dd nursery is 35 min away, she starts at 1.

Ds comes out at 5.15 (I'm always late)
And dd at 5.45. By the time I get home it's usually 6.35ish

But I'm shattered!! I feel like I can't cope collecting them, work won't let me leave any earlier and the nursery is funded hours so can't put them in any longer. I was moaning to my partner how I'm struggling and he just called me lazy aibu?

I realise this is something parents do every day, maybe because I'm not in the habit of it just yet?
I also have 9m old baby too and it just feels never ending!!
Is there any way to make it any easier? Or do I just grin and bear it?

I don't pay for nursery, they use the funded hours as said in my op!!

I can see why you're exhausted!

What does the nursery say about you always being late to collect DS?? It's quite rude to be consistently late picking up, you're using time you haven't paid for. A lot of nurseries fine you by the minute for being late, especially if it means staff can't go home on time. Your working hours aren't their problem.

I think you need to either cut down your hours further, or find a job with different hours. Or have somebody else pick up DS. I don't see another war around it!

*way

The staff don't go home anyway, it turns into after school club.
They've said its not currently a problem

Even if nanny solution isn’t cheaper, does it actually gain you more when you consider all the impacts? Eg impacts on your ability to work and progress your career, impacts on your family life if DH can move his working hours to a day time pattern, impacts on your stress and your kids’ stress? I’d look at it as an investment rather than a cost. Affordability is a short term issue, but one that can be solved. For example you might free up an extra 5+ hours a week to work if you don’t do drop offs and someone comes to your home. So look at it holistically.

We had this kind of set up when my kids were younger . Four kids close in age , me looking after them most days then working nights or weekends, albeit only part time but it is utterly relentless and exhausting working around each other like this. Hope you mange to find a better solution.