Do you buy your kids presents just because?

[MonstranceClock]

I was out shopping with some friends this morning and picked up a toy and some books from my daughter. I got loads of questions about why I'm buying her presents when her birthday isn't till August, why would I spoil her like that, wish they had money to waste blah blah blah.
Is it really unusual? My parents used bring me back things that they had seen if they knew I would like it. I didn't see any harm in it but they really pissed me off!

This is making me feel much better! I just think it's a nice thing to do. She never asks for anything, shes such a sweet girl. This present was a little more expensive than what I would usually buy but I've just had my student loan in and I wanted to treat her!

I’m terrible at getting mine a cheap toy car whilst out at the moment, though only if we’ve been to the ‘big shops’ and as a initiative to behave (they’re only just out of the pram full time). Birthday is a few weeks off Christmas as well, so sometimes a bigger item can’t really be put off until the end of the year ‘as a birthday/Christmas present’ - for example something bigger/expensive for the garden to play with in summer is no use being bought in winter. Generally though, it’s not something that’s done often in our house.

I'm 44 and my mother still does this, and we do it for her too. If you see something nice you think she'll like, then what's the harm?

Id do things like if they went to the corner shop to buy the Sunday papers for me they could spend the change on sweets or a small toy. I don’t think I bought them cheap toys as they were just too cheap and breakable. I think if we had an outing to a zoo we’d go into gift shop for a toy. But don’t think I bought them much outside of that. But I certainly would not call out another parent for buying stuff - none of my business how they raise their child.

My daughters make me proud every day. They work hard at school and are generally good so yes, I like to treat them. Usually to some art and craft material, books or a small toy. Their grandparents also treat them (all the time!). The also both have their birthdays around Christmas so if we didn't treat them throughout the year they'd have to wait a long time for something.

No I don't and my house is still full of toys! I do buy books quite often and they get pocket money and sometimes holiday spending money though.

Yes I do this every now and then, mine are teenagers. My DD loves beauty stuff so I will get her some bits. Sometimes I will treat her to some Clinique stuff when they are doing offers.

DS's birthday is within a week of Christmas. I'm not making him wait up to 51 weeks of the year to get him things he likes or needs, and under that logic, he'd never own anything seasonal for the warmer months or would have to wait a year when his needs and interests have probably changed by the time you wait until December then the next summer.

His sibling is better timed into the spring. Big outdoor things like bikes, I'll tend to buy for both around then because that's the start of the season where they can be used. It's nicer for them to get them then, than in December where you go for a cold, mucky ride then put it in the garage to get covered in sawdust and cobwebs until the spring anyway.

I keep Christmas and birthdays more modest. In the month preceeding the birthday/ Christmas I will put them on hold and quietly buy things and save them.

Your friend sounds rude, and not a little annoying!

What's it to her? I'd have told her to do one.

I do, things like books, colouring pens, bath bombs and other bits. I’ve made a deal with myself to cut it down now though as it was getting to the point we couldn’t go anywhere without having a little “gift”
My 2 are still quite young though 6 & 3

Yes, I do. One of my kids you couldn't keep her in books so I've always bought books for her, my other two aren't as enthusiastic readers so I pick something else for them. I buy presents for my mum and sister the odd time as well - if I see something on offer they'd like.

I do, but don't bother much for birthdays etc. I'd much rather buy them something I know they will like when I see it than go searching for an obligatory "present".

If I'm organised I sometimes put things away for an upcoming birthday.

I did until a few weeks ago when DS(3) started demanding things whenever we went out. So I stopped.
My mum, his GM is fully behind it but MIL is a law unto herself. And now he demands a surprise whenever he goes to her house. It's horrible.
I don't think it'll take long before he snaps out of it, but the screaming tantrums in Tesco when I actively avoided the toy aisle yesterday weren't pleasant.
Books I'm happy to buy, craft bits and pieces I'll happily buy but no more bloody toys!!!

I always buy extra bits and bobs during the year for family but we don’t really do presents hauls at Christmas or birthdays I like having a little gift about once a month and a big gift and good meal for my birthday/Christmas although when I say big gift it’s max 50 quid 😂

My sis just got me doc martins as a Christmas/birthday/Christmas gift and I’m super happy

Yes, I do. Most often books or arts and crafts stuff but occasionally toys.

I don't think of things like this as presents. He needs a new book, trainers, t-shirt etc I pick it up when I see it.

Yes I do, particularly books or if we've been for a day out and there's a gift shop. She's just a baby though and I need a good variety of baby books and toys for my benefit more than hers!

we do occaisionally. ds isnt at all spoilt. hes very appreciative and thankful.

I think there is a harm actually if it’s done frequently and for no reason. It sets up an expectation around material “ stuff” and consumerism that I think is a bit crap for everyone. ( including the planet). That doesn’t mean I don’t succumb to occasional smallish purchases ( headband, book or key ring etc) but I certainly don’t want there to be an expectation that they’ll always receive that. My friend truly has dug herself a hole with toy purchases every time she goes into a shop - (including the supermarket ) which results in tantrums and bad behaviour from her DD when she doesn’t get her own way. This includes large items like bikes and scooters which I would never buy outside of a birthday or Christmas. To be that’s the very definition of spoiling a child.

Yes I always have and even now they are adults I buy them things just because I know they will like it. It isn't buying a child things that makes them spoiled it's a lack of boundaries that spoils a child.

Yes of course, my daughter loves to read so I buy her books (often from the charity shop)
I'll also get her something shes asked for, the other day she'd asked for a small pocket sized note pad so I picked her one up.
As adults we often have a desire to buy something because we just want it, just because children don't have direct access to money doesn't make it any different.

I do this for my kids and my husband. The kids get regular pocket money and they often buy little things for each other "just because". I like it that they are generous to their brothers.

If I see something I think they'll like, yes I'll pick it up for them. However, if I get something for one DD, I'll look for something for the other one as well! Only little things like hair clips, pencils etc.

I do. Little things, like a magazine, they might get more frequently; bigger things, like a toy, are less frequent but still just whenever. If we’ve recently bought them something bigger, I’ll tend to avoid another bigger purchase for a month or two at least as I don’t want them to think they can get everything on demand (and also financially much better that way!). I ask them to consider what they want on that occasion as we won’t be shopping for toys again for a while, for instance.

On the other hand, I don’t save up presents or big things for birthdays. My dad is the same so I grew up with it. He always said he didn’t see the point in waiting months to give someone something you knew they’d like, and likewise didn’t see the point in buying something bland ‘just because’ it’s a particular day. I agree with the sentiment (he also said you never know what might happen tomorrow hence give it today, which is a touch morbid but also a fair point!).