For not wanting to holiday abroad?

[chocolatelog]

Myself and 4 out of 5 of the children haven't been abroad. We don't even have passports.

Dh and the 3 oldest all want to go on holiday this year. Dh has found a holiday for 10 days in Spain and is pressuring me to go but I've got zero interest. My eldest (17) has been with her friends family so she's got the bug and is begging me to go.
A part of me feels like I should go because before long the kids will be older and won't be interested in going with us, but I just can't be bothered with it all. I filled in one passport form and that was enough to make me go 🙈 it took 5 attempts at getting it wrong, so the thought of filling in 5 people's worth is enough to put me into an early grave!

The two youngest are 5 and 2 and I feel like it won't really be an enjoyable experience for me, dh is very hands on with them but I'm a stress head and get into rage pretty quickly 😬

Plus the money for passports and the actual holiday for 7 people makes me think we could use it for better things, we both need a new cat each and I'm thinking I'd rather those than a pissing holiday 🤦🏻‍♀️

I don't know if my attitude to it all is because I've never been abroad, I'm quite happy to spend a week in Cornwall or Dorset or anywhere else that this country has to offer. The thought of flying and watching the kids like a hawk just doesn't appeal to me in the slightest. Is it a case of what you've never had you never miss? Or should I just put my happy face on and agree to going?

TBF I can see why your family don't want to go out with you, you must suck the fun out of everything.

I really don't understand people who don't want to visit other countries or see other cultures......and it's spectacularly selfish to prevent your children from doing so.

@DexyMidnight wind up merchant 😂😂😂

Not sure about Spain - it's a bit of an acquired taste.

What about a less daunting destination like a city break somewhere like Amsterdam or Copenhagen where everyone speaks English?

You could also try Ireland.

You'll still need the passports though - they are expensive, but you can apply online and then you can't make a mistake.

To be honest you've got a 2 year old, kids that age are awkward baggage on holiday, so maybe wait a year or two anyway? Or DH goes with the older ones, as others have suggested.

Spain is beautiful and you don't have to lay around sunbathing. Hire a car and you can do day trips to theme parks and water parks, you can explore the mountains and beaches.
The old towns are also wonderful and it will be great to show your children another culture!
Compromise with dh and say you will go as long as he deals with the passport forms and you won't be laying around doing nothing all the time (I also hate sunbathing )

"Well, then you need to do something to sort out your anxiety."

what really helps with mine is staying home. I could Diazepam my way through all kinds of new experiences but you know, I prefer not to.

I am surprised at posters saying "why worry about kids in Spain" but I've been hospitalised abroad and it's traumatic for the person in hospital but also for parents who might not speak language etc.

You're a hoot OP, laughing at all the well-meaning lefties trying to help you out, while you type away with your crude English from your luxe holiday in Mauritius.

Op can I ask what you enjoy? In an ideal world how would you all spend family time together? What do you and DC/DH enjoy doing together?

I do think you should give it a go since the others are so keen. If this particular holiday doesn't appeal find a different one that does. What do the kids enjoy? What do you enjoy? Even if nothing about travelling appeals to you it's only a week or so and it would be unfair to restrict the rest of the family.

You can't afford a holiday if going will leave your husband without a van to get to work.

You're being very unreasonable. You sound like really hard work; I think let your DH take them and you stay at home. Your kids might resent you for it one day, though.

Constanza "I really don't understand people who don't want to visit other countries or see other cultures"

if it makes you feel better, my parents come from another country and another culture. Not one you'd take daughters to, especially after being lucky enough to get out.

@Anothertempusername I'd love nothing else but he won't 😩

If you and dh want different things then a compromise is in order.
What could that look like for you OP?

Holidays are a waste of money imo with nothing to show for it at the end

ah see I have the opposite opinion, id rather have lovely memories with my kids and my husband, because life is short isn't it.

Id get far more enjoyment out of a holiday than I would a new car.

Ok, If I had enough money for a holiday OR a car, and I didn't have a car and needed one, then sensible choice would be a car but you can bet id be saving for a holiday as soon as possible after!

What's that got to do with my point Rosa ?

Does that mean you should avoid travelling at all costs? Even to places known to be relatively safe?

@Namestheyareachangin I like theatres, cinema weekends away, reading, sightseeing and eating.

Everything they don't like doing. We're all very different.

"The World is a book, and those who do not travel read only one page" St Augustine.

You will never know if it is not for you until you try.

@Rosawaiting if it makes you feel better, my parents come from another country and another culture. Not one you'd take daughters to, especially after being lucky enough to get out

That's scarcely relevant to the week in a Spanish villa proposed though is it?

i've no interest in seeing other country's

What a sad perspective on life. There is a whole, amazing world out there and you have no interest in seeing it?

Are you raising your children to be similarly narrow minded and sheltered?

Dh has been abroad so he's not missing out and has another Vegas trip lined up for later this year

also this, If I was your child I would resent the pair of you. Dad going away every year, and no kids going because Mum CBA taking us and might be scared of flying (am scared of heights and fine flying btw).

The whole situation screams that you couldn't give a shit about what your kids want.

@chocolatelog So are you saying you don't enjoy spending any leisure time with your family?

I am surprised at posters saying "why worry about kids in Spain" but I've been hospitalised abroad and it's traumatic for the person in hospital but also for parents who might not speak language etc.

So what should we all do then? Stay at home and never travel anywhere?

If that is the case, and I don't mean to be provocative at all, but why did you have such a lot of children?