Overzealous MIL

[Iheartlondon]

To say MIL was excited when dd was born is an understatement. She went massively overboard on gifts, and it felt like it was all about her becoming a grandmother. She spent her first visit trying to get rid of me so she could have dd to herself. She held dd for far longer than anyone else did but still got in a huff when I eventually took her back. She turned up with a stinking cold once and still expected to hold dd.
We don't see her very often as she doesn't live nearby but I find myself dreading visits. During a recent day visit despite being told we didn't need anything for dd we arrived to find that a bedroom had been kitted out with loads of stuff we didn't need (travel cot, booster seat - all borrowed though) and her living room is full of photos of dd. She's bought herself a grandmother photo album and is just obsessed with photos of her. When we do see her she'll stare at dd. I find it very smothering.
aibu to be bothered by this? my parents love dd but are a lot more laid back and I wish mil was too.
dd is her only grandchild and this is unlikely to change.

I don't understand why the photos bother you. I have many more photos displayed of my grandchidren than anyone else. I would say most grandparents do. It has never bothered my DD or SiL. My DD and SiL also regularly send me photos of the DGD , I don't print them off and display them,but if I did why would it matter?
Re the equipment she borrowed when you visited she was probably just trying to bre helpful. You said many of her friends have grandchildren so I expect they asked her if she would like to borrow equioment for the visit, again I'm, not sure why it bothers you. She obviosly loves her very much and you can't have too many people loving you.

It would only be a problem if she interfered in your parenting and nothing you have said so far implies that
I feel quite sorry for her, she lost her husband recently and probably sees your daughter as a lovely sign of life to contrast with her grief.

My family don't see dd more, there are more people to see so they end up getting less time. mil gets the most time, definitely much more than dm.
I'm not trying to see the worst in her, the video comment was supposed to be tongue in cheek.
With the items it was more about being told we didn't need anything and doing it anyway.
She did some other things to help us which I was very grateful for.