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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

About a different meal to the one that's been slaved over?

523 replies

breakthepattern · 14/04/2019 19:31

Person A thinks that's what's been served for dinner (2 adults, 2 DC under 7) is what we're eating. End of. If you don't like it, you don't eat it, that's your choice. It's delicious and not "out there" or very unusual.

Person B thinks if you've never had it before, try it a little and then say you don't like it, it's ok for you to be made an alternative just for you, so you don't go hungry.

Who is BU?

For further info it's one of the DC refusing the food.

It's squash risotto with sage and pine nuts so quite "adult" depending on your perspective / diet.

And the replacement alternative was a ham and cheese wrap, no cooking involved.

OP posts:
geekone · 15/04/2019 17:50

So the rule in our house. You need to eat what’s out in front of you. It’s not going to kill you and seeing as you didn’t like it we won’t make it again. If you chose to only eat half (minimum requirement) that’s fine you can have a portion of fruit after. Our DS isn’t that picky though so he would grumble but get on with it and then tell me.

geekone · 15/04/2019 17:50

He’s 7

geekone · 15/04/2019 17:50

That’s a lie Blush he’s 9

HotpotLawyer · 15/04/2019 17:56

www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/7767/butternut-squash-and-sage-risotto

I assume this is the risotto in question.

It looks like risotto.

Risotto is rice with a little cheese and whatever else you choose to put in it. Personally I am not mad keen on squash but risotto is a great food for kids.
And mine would be in orbit if they said food prepared for them looked like sick.

Doje · 15/04/2019 18:07

I'm with person A, but looks like I'm in the minority. There's nothing to actively dislike about a butternut squash risotto. And even then, as a PP said - it won't kill you. Sometimes you have to eat things that you don't like. With mine (aged 3 & 5) I would ensure they ate a good amount. If they were really struggling then probably half.

IHeartKingThistle · 15/04/2019 18:25

Wow, some of you are super rude. You're grown adults saying 'bleurgh' and 'that looks like sick' and 'poncey shit' to someone's perfectly normal plate of food? It really is normal food and even if it's not your thing, your lack of manners is appalling.

IHeartKingThistle · 15/04/2019 18:28

BTW mine would have to try it properly and, more importantly, not be rude about it before I would consider letting them have something different. One sick noise or whiny comment and they'd be in serious trouble and they know it. But they don't do that because from an early age I've taught them polite alternatives to 'bleurgh'. Sounds like some of you could do with those too.

cricketmum84 · 15/04/2019 18:41

Sometimes you have to eat things that you don't like

I'm sorry but you really don't!!

FelixTitling · 15/04/2019 18:44

Why are you 'slaving over' a tea for under 7's anyway. Particularly one they haven't had before. Setting yourself up for a massive fall there.

Unreasonable to expect them to to appreciate your massive culinary efforts. Especially if they don't like it.

Bleurgh is an entirely appropriate response for an under 7 I think, and one you should be prepared for.

I never cook for adults without checking that they might like it first.

MariaNovella · 15/04/2019 19:03

What on earth is polite about insisting your child eat something they don’t like?

Some parents are really horrible to their children!

RomanyQueen1 · 15/04/2019 19:08

We didn't allow fussy, but if there was something they didn't like or thought they wouldn't we wouldn't cook it.
We had a couple who tried fussy but it got them nowhere. Grin
In the fridge for the next day, and so on until eaten.

SpriggyTheHedgehog · 15/04/2019 19:14

"We had a couple who tried fussy but it got them nowhere. 
In the fridge for the next day, and so on until eaten."

What a cruel way to treat a child. I don't know why you'd be so smug about that? I'd be ashamed.

Whodafeck · 15/04/2019 19:15

If you put it in the fridge for me or Dd we would have starved. Literally. Starved. Especially DD (multiple hospital admissions for failure to thrive)

MariaNovella · 15/04/2019 19:26

Honestly. Some parents think torture is an appropriate way to treat their children. Just give them something nutritious and that they enjoy eating, FFS.

M4J4 · 15/04/2019 19:28

@Whodafeck

No, you would not have 'literally starved'. Get some toast or fruit if you don't want what's cooked.

And not everyone can afford to cook alternative meals. In my family, mum made one dish for all, and you either ate that or you ate bread/fruit. She had neither the time or money to cater to every whim of her NT children.

Aquilla · 15/04/2019 19:29

Here's a tip: whenever you make something new or a bit weird for dinner - skip afternoon tea. Works (nearly) everytime.

IHaveBrilloHair · 15/04/2019 19:31

"Literally starved"
Ahhhaha, I bloody love MN.Grin

MariaNovella · 15/04/2019 19:35

It really isn’t a laughing matter.

adaline · 15/04/2019 19:37

Sometimes you have to eat things that you don't like.

@Doje - why? I certainly don't eat things I don't like!

M4J4 · 15/04/2019 19:42

Honestly. Some parents think torture is an appropriate way to treat their children. Just give them something nutritious and that they enjoy eating, FFS.

And if you have 5 kids and they all like different things?

Some people don't live in the real world.

SpriggyTheHedgehog · 15/04/2019 19:43

That's what the majority have been saying though, that kids can have bread/fruit/cereal etc as an alternative, not that their parents have to make a whole new meal for them.

FelixTitling · 15/04/2019 19:46

We had a couple who tried fussy but it got them nowhere. In the fridge for the next day, and so on until eaten."

This is shocking, and abusive. Your use of the smiley face with this statement makes me feel sick.

No wonder so many children grow up to have issues around food.

For the record, I will eat anything. Not because I like it, but because I was made to stay at the table until my plate was clean. My parents saw leaving food as my disregard for how hard they had worked to put food on my plate. I don't doubt it was a struggle, it was the 70's after all, and we weren't wealthy.

However I struggle with guilt issues when I leave or decline food, and so invariably do neither. I'm completely unable to recognise when I'm hungry or full. I just eat everything.

Please think of the damage your dictatorial attitude might do.

misskatamari · 15/04/2019 19:47

My kids wouldn't eat that I'm sure. I've tried them with risotto before and they're not fans. In our house I'd expect them to try it, but if they didn't like it then would do something like a wrap, or sandwich, as suggested. I wouldn't ever force them to eat something the actually dislike, that's just cruel. As long as they have a try (a few tastes at least), then I'd be happy with that

Raspberry88 · 15/04/2019 19:49

That's what the majority have been saying though, that kids can have bread/fruit/cereal etc as an alternative, not that their parents have to make a whole new meal for them.

Yes, that's what's confusing me about this thread. No one's saying that parents should be cooking multiple meals, but that if a child doesn't like what's been prepared then they shouldn't be forced to eat it and can have something easy rather than go to bed hungry.

TowerRavenSeven · 15/04/2019 19:54

B with a twist. They can have toast & fruit.