About a different meal to the one that's been slaved over?

[breakthepattern]

Person A thinks that's what's been served for dinner (2 adults, 2 DC under 7) is what we're eating. End of. If you don't like it, you don't eat it, that's your choice. It's delicious and not "out there" or very unusual.

Person B thinks if you've never had it before, try it a little and then say you don't like it, it's ok for you to be made an alternative just for you, so you don't go hungry.

Who is BU?

For further info it's one of the DC refusing the food.

It's squash risotto with sage and pine nuts so quite "adult" depending on your perspective / diet.

And the replacement alternative was a ham and cheese wrap, no cooking involved.

Look at some of the comments including comments that you've made, Bertrand, just because people don't like risotto. There are ridiculous comments on both sides.

It depends whether you think everyone will like it or not. I mainly cook things that I know or think we will all eat (not necessarily everyone will love though). So mine all eat risotto and squash, sage is a standard herb, I’d do optional ohne nuts dir everyone to put in top as ds2 can be funny about nuts. That way I’d be fairly sure we’d all eat it, so I’d be A.
If I’m trying something completely new which someone might not be keen on, I’d do as a PP and make it one component of the meal so there’s definitely be other stuff to eat too.

You think that burgers are disgusting, Tatiana when they're a perfectly normal food. What's disgusting to you isn't to others, and vice versa. It isn't that difficult a concept.

I specifically said McDonalds - which is junk food.

The point is not that people like different things - no shit Sherlock. But that if you can put away junk food with no nutritional value, high sodium, high fat content etc; or chocolate with a low cocoa content and high additives; or crisps with chemical flavouring (which is pretty much every kind save ready salted); then you can put away squash and sage without making a fuss. Otherwise it’s simply histrionics.

If children raised to luurve McDonalds were raised to eat all types of vegetables without fuss, there would be less general whining on these threads and potentially less of an obesity crisis.

Drama queen is gendered? That's news to me - it's an equal opportunity insult as far as I'm aware.

I looked up the origin before commenting, but couldn't find any real information other than speculation about it originating from the gay community.

Tatiana that isn’t true. My DD can’t eat squash due to texture.

She doesn’t eat McDonald’s either fwiw.

I wasn't diagnosed with asd until adulthood. I wasn't allowed to leave the table until I ate a part of everything, even if I sat there sobbing after everyone had left. I was malnourished and dreaded mealtimes.

I suppose I was just being a drama queen.

Or crisps.

Or chocolate.

Or ice cream.

Exactly chicken.

Me too. With me it was porridge for every meal til I ate it and bread and butter with only water when I didn’t.

I’m dairy intolerant. And bloat on gluten. It used to give me stomach ache. And I would cry. And be told I was making a fuss over nothing and just to eat.

Why does food issues have such a lack of understanding and such horrible judgemental attitudes to it?

"I wonder how many people who can’t cope with squash risotto eat burgers. World’s no 1 most vile foodstuff."

You just said burgers earlier, and I fail to see how liking X food means that someone must like Y.

I tend to do a middle ground in the first place and when I'm cooking something new I nearly always ensure there is something liked and trusted on the plate still. And if it is things like a curry and rice I would seperate the curry from the rice so if they don't like.the curry they still have the rice and sides.

I’ve asked hq if they could get an expert to do a guest post on ASD and food issues and the comorbidity (again, is that what I mean?) to raise awareness.

I do believe that it is possible to both have genuine food issues AND be a drama queen over them.

Have you never started to eat something and had a companion go OH! OH MY GOD THAT'S DISGUSTING! HOW CAN YOU EAT THAT! on and on at full volume and often in a very high pitched shriek?

That's a real thing that some people do, and I don't think it's necessary even with ASD in the mix. It happened basically every time I took marmite sandwiches to school!

Ironically the people I know with ASD are the most accepting of differences.

You just said burgers earlier, and I fail to see how liking X food means that someone must like Y

So I did, well burgers are a good example. Many supermarket burgers are made from centrifuged sludge.

If you can manage to get that down without gagging then you don’t have a leg to stand on when it comes to a vegetable.

Gosh. Well. OK. Not sure what to say now. One can only apologise so many times. But just to say, you are wrong about drama queen. It’s neither gendered nor misogynist. I suppose at a stretch it might be a little bit homophobic. But it would be a pretty big stretch........

I had no idea that this dish existed but blow me down it does with many recipes on the net.

Your DD is ASD, no whodafeck?

And as she doesn’t eat either she doesn’t disprove my point.

Jamie also does a beetroot risotto that I have made because the colour was so spectacular. I served it as a starter and it did divide opinion rather.

Just because she doesn’t eat one thing doesn’t mean she should or should not eat another Tatiana.

Pink slime/Lean finely textured beef isn't used in the U.K.

I would make something different provided they had tried it. I don't really know anyone who eats absolutely everything and always has done so it's kind to provide children with options and allow them to explore and their palates to develop. The food I eat in my 30s has evolved from that eaten in my teens and twenties so I wouldn't expect a child to have a full adult acceptance of textures and flavours

I'm with B. If they try it and genuinely don't like it, then my children get something else. It would be something basic like a sandwich or toast though.

I have risotto and would actually rather stay hungry than eat it, so I'm also with the kids on this one.

I currently make different meals for dd2 because she kept disliking all the meals the rest of us had, now she gets a basic potato, veg, veggie fingers or soup or pasta for her meals to save the waste.

I don’t give really give a stuff what she eats tbh whodafeck

BertrandRussell
I made that risotto and wasnt keen at all which surprised me as I was expecting to love it.

Vegetables and burgers, supermarket or otherwise, have different tastes or textures. It's perfectly possible to like burgers and not, for example, peas.

Not just ASD....there are many children and adults with complex needs who have food issues.

There are many elements in play with my ds's restricted diet (autistic tendencies, sensory issues, an association with pain, reflux, fear of change, swallowing issues when younger....).

I am wrong to bring them to this thread, as these issues are part of his complex needs - not histrionics or drama...and hopefully not due to inadequate parenting or me just producing shit food for my children, but I would be interested in a guest post. T

There are so many threads about 'fussy eating' on mumsnet, that can make people with experience of more extreme food issues feel rather put upon.