Aibu? I want to do driving lessons

[grainykite]

But my DP is insistent it should be him my reasoning is I'm the one stuck at home with the kids so surely it would give me more freedom, instead of relying on him or waiting for him to become available?
Who is BU

The car has been bought, it's stored, will people stop banging on about it.

WRT to who learns to drive first, my take would be the one who is most likely to pass the test the quickest. How about you both have one lesson each with the same instructor and ask them which one do they think will pass quickest. Then do a ratio of 3:1 so that person is getting 3 lessons to the others 1 lesson. When the 3 person takes their test then split it 1:1.

Currently OP has a bike so he just cycles and if he can't be arsed to cycle he will walk. It's about a 25 min walk.
Kids are just walked to nursery which in Scottish weather can be quite rough so I'd appreciate the car on those days but then I guess so would he for work?
I had bad anxiety after my youngest was born and now she's a few months old I've found the courage to get help and meds for it so I'd quite like to experience some freedom and do something for myself.
Or maybe we should just wait and keep saving? Especially when his hours go up it should be manageable then? But lessons around here are 30pH and especially if you're getting weekly ones, I just don't think it'd stretch that far for us both to do it

Currently OP 😂 I meant DP

The lady who sold the car drove it to us.

Course she did.

How long does the theory test stay valid for? Could you both take it and whoever passes/has the highest mark gets first go at the lessons?

I know you probably feel got at with everyone questioning your car purchase but, honestly, it may well have seized up by the time you pass if it really is sorned and there are no adults to help you with it. If it was a great bargain you could even try and sell it for more than you paid and put that towards the lesson fund...

Who would have your dc if you did a week intensive course?

Think it's valid for a year isn't it? But that's a good idea to start on the theory test first, my partners father would drive it but wouldn't feel comfortable trying to each us.
The lady couldn't get it sold, she'd been trying for 6 months hence the extremely low price but no doubt somebody will be along just now to say that means the car is a shit heap. Despite us having a mechanic to the house to check over it 🙄

The lady couldn't get it sold, she'd been trying for 6 months hence the extremely low price but no doubt somebody will be along just now to say that means the car is a shit heap.

I'm not saying it's a shit heap, but it does seem strange that it was sold so cheaply if there was nothing wrong, why wouldn't she part exchange instead.

I bought a car before I could drive so I could practise between lessons. Made me pass a lot more quicker as I had experience so it’s. it that unusual

I don't know ice rebel go ask her.
We had it checked over while it was still parked at her house and checked over when it came to ours

Currently OP has a bike so he just cycles and if he can't be arsed to cycle he will walk. It's about a 25 min walk.
Kids are just walked to nursery which in Scottish weather can be quite rough so I'd appreciate the car on those days but then I guess so would he for work?

So, could you learn and drive him to/from work? 'Average' walking pace is 3 miles/hr, so a 25 minute walk would be around 1.5 miles. At 25 mph that's only a 3-4 minute drive, unless you're driving through a clogged city centre. Would that work with the DC nursery schedule?

What did you buy? I wouldn't have fancies driving a 7 seater straight out of passing my test! But then im a bit nervous and don't like driving big cars now, 10 years later!

To answer your question, I think you should learn. But it doesn't sound like you're going to be able to get him to agree to that so I think you need to find a compromise. The intensive courses are quite expensive aren't they? Can't you take normal lessons and both learn that way?

It doesn't necessarily mean it's a shit heap, no but it does probably mean it was worth what you paid for it so not necessarily a great bargain. Perhaps once you've had a few lessons your fil would feel comfortable accompanying you. If you're going to tax it and insure it for him to drive, you may as well get the benefit. Even if he drives you somewhere very quiet initially for you to practice parking. That's what my dad did with us at first, we went to industrial estates on the weekend and evenings and drove round there.

Poor OP is getting a roasting when all she asked was who should have lessons first. This has digressed! Op do you theory. It’s valid for two years and then you both have two years to pass. Theory costs around £30-35 to take and you can download apps to help you study. I used driving master theory and it was really good.

So you can't afford a lesson a week each but one of you can do an weeks intensive course

Oh and you might get bitten on the arse with insurance. My quotes for a 7 seater (2.0 VW) came in at over £3k to add DD when she passed, that was just her as an additional driver, not even the policyholder. I am the holder and I have years of no claims.

Poor OP is getting a roasting when all she asked was who should have lessons first

Sometimes you get the answers you need, rather than the answers you want

Yes because we have a wee bit of savings. The course would only be about 200 as I've had lots of previous experience. For us to have 3 lessons each, you're already looking at £180.
We looked previously at insurance and it didn't seem too badly priced.
Definitely is worth hundreds more, the same car same model only a few less miles on the clock is currently being sold on auto trader for 1,900 odd

No FIL wouldn't feel comfortable helping us at all, it's just his nature. He is a worry driver

The course would only be about 200 as I've had lots of previous experience

It doesn't work like that. If you sign up to an intensive course it is a standardised thing, so many hours over so many days with a test at the end. You are living in cloud cuckoo land of you think you will get an intensive for £200

Definitely is worth hundreds more, the same car same model only a few less miles on the clock is currently being sold on auto trader for 1,900 odd

That means nothing. There are many variables when it comes to low end second hand cars. Same model and mileage doesn't equate to same price.

Poor OP is getting a roasting when all she asked was who should have lessons first.

Poor OP is getting reality when her head is in the clouds. Sometimes you need to be told how it is.

If you can't both afford to have lessons at what, £50 a week for you both one each, then you certainly won't be able to afford to insure, tax, MOT, service, and fill with petrol weekly a 7 seater car as a new driver.

My car lease, insurance, tax, and petrol on my car monthly costs me £263. Without the car lease it's still £190. And I've had my licence for 6 years with 1 non fault bump. And fuck me dead when its time for services and MOTs 🙄

There's a huge difference between being able to afford lessons and actually being able to afford to drive.

In your position I would sell the car (7 seats is overkill and will be ridiculous to insure) and use it to fund someone through their lessons and test and buy a smaller car with the remaining money. Also believe you should drive, no point paying so much to run a car if it's sat in a work car park all day.

I've already said my partners hours go up so in a few months it will be affordable.
And yes pp I checked the intensive course, it's 255 and you do your test at the end of it. If I hadnt had a lot of experience, it would be about 400 odd as you need more hours.

7 seats is not overkill. We have 3 car seats to fit!

Yes I know it doesn't mean much but this car is roughly the £1,800 Mark. I haven't found it any cheaper and we've looked for a good few months