To ask how often you speak to your MIL?

[CakePigeon4]

MIL and I get on fine, they live a way away so we don’t see them that often, but generally have a nice time when we go to stay. However MIL is always making little digs that I should contact her more - despite the fact that she has never rung me in the 12 years DH & I have been married. I’m not sure what I would say if I did ring her - we have very little in common, and she’s not exactly a talker at the best of times, and I find conversation quite hard work when I’m with her.

So am I a crap daughter-in-law?! How often do you speak to your MILs? Is it not normal to just get news updates from DH, rather than expecting me to ring her?

She probably means that your DP isn’t in touch as much as she’d like. How often does he call? Do you have children?

Never 😉

I never just ring her for a chat.
Speak to her when I see her which is very couple of weeks.

I never ring my mil. I speak to her when we visit a couple of times a year and she comes to ours once a year. Dh tries to speak to her weekly but she doesn't always answer her phone

Never in 26 years and that’s the way I intend to keep it. Her son is perfectly capable of phoning her himself and telling her any news.

Never. If i do its facebook comments

@BertrandRussell DH rings them every few weeks - they have never rung us, ever

We see each other once a week probably, sometimes miss a week..
Speak to each other once or twice a week through text, she just asks how the kids are doin etc.
But it's usually her that makes the effort!

Why is it your job to ring her ? Does your husband ring your mother ? No, I thought not.

Once a week minimum.

We speak when we see each other, maybe once every six weeks or so. Other than that maybe a couple of times a year when one of us thinks of something specific to tell the other. I'd say it's DH who should be in contact with her!

@IM0GEN this was exactly my point!

@Crimebustersofthesea DH is in contact semi-regularly, but they never ever make the effort to contact us. I find it intensely frustrating that she seems to think the effort should all be on our part

I speak with mine a couple of times a week and see her and fil once a week. But our situation’s different as DH has a very life limiting illness.

Perhaps she feels bound by expectation to have a ‘closer’ relationship but doesn’t really want to? Maybe there’s a friend somewhere going on about the fab close relationship they have with their dil and she feels she ‘should’ be having that with you (even if she’s happy the way things are)?

There’s nothing to stop her calling more though if this is the case!

My mum used to go and visit my dad's mum often, even without taking us kids sometimes (if she was home and we were at school or playdates), but she lived about two miles away and was really lovely! I don't think that's the norm.

If she made “ little digs” at me I would choose to see her a lot less. Life is too short to spend time with people who are unpleasant. Especially
If they are not your family .

Never. Only speak to her when we see them, once every 6 weeks roughly.

If they ever call, it’s nearly always FIL who calls.

My parents never call me because they seem to worry that I might be busy and they would be interrupting me! I call them once a week or so.

DH calls his parents once a week or fortnight, I would never call my MIL just for a chat.

DH rings when he’s driving. Fairly regularly.

I ring sometimes. Less than weekly more than monthly.

They visit every couple of months (we’re overseas).

I text or FB message most days. Often just a picture of the garden or the weather. She talks to the kids on their mobiles directly as well.

I couldn’t ask for a nicer MIL :)

As in on the phone? I don’t think I do, I do text her a lot though and we see her often. Minimum of every other week if we are busy but usually weekly. I’ll also take DD to go see her if DP is away. We get on well though so it’s no problem for me.
I have never really understood how people don’t get on with their in-laws (I’m not taking a dig at anyone)
I will talk to my ex’s parents too. And my ex’s wife’s family so maybe I’m just weird

I contact mine via text every couple of weeks usually about our daughter. That's ir, no calls.

Never I let my partner deal with her.

Never. How often does my Dh just ring my parents for a quick catch up chat? Never.

My MIL is lovely but we don't speak much over the phone. I usually have a chat with after DH has spoken to her on the phone. I would call her if I know she's been ill or been away for a bit of a catch up but no more than once a month. We generally get together once a month but this is usually instigated by another family member.

I don’t call anyone tbh. I WhatsApp my MIL a bit on a what’sapp I have with her and DH. I get on well with her though.