AIBU - Morning Phone call

[MrsNacho]

My DP works away. In the morning he gets up in his hotel, has a shower, throws on his work gear and then rings me.

It drives me mad!!

In the morning I get up, sort out the wet washing in the machine, have a shower, start calling the kids, dry my hair, call the kids some more, cajole the youngest into getting dressed, clean my teeth, feed the animals, lose my temper at the teen, finally get him up, supervise his medication and carb count his breakfast, do my face, remind everyone to get everything several times, referee the endless bickering...

so basically a good morning chat is the very last thing that I need. Then I am driving, dropping two kids at breakfast club, the teen near his school and getting to work hopefully on time. I am a new driver so even if I remembered to ring him on hands free before we left, I don't want the distraction.

We have spoken about this before and he says well I just wanted to hear your voice.

Today he rang and I was a bit short with him and I think he is offended.

So AIBU to tell him not to call me in the morning?

[teraculum29]

He sound needy and attention seeking, and the facebook thing would be a no no from me.
And it's sounds that he might be one of those guys that would be jealous of the attention you are giving to children. I might be wrong.....

[BlackCatSleeping]

Op, what I do is I just hang up my washing in the evening before I go to bed. Strictly against MN protocol of it not getting darked on, but it saves me a job in the morning. You can have an extra 5 minutes to MN and enjoy your morning tea.

[DuckbilledSplatterPuff]

"" @DuckbilledSplatterPuff You obviously think it's OK to phone your partner, and bug them when they're busy, because YOU do it to yours. ""

No American Dream.. In fact I do not. He's often in meetings so I would never do that.

Also also I Never said I called my DH when he's busy. So where did you get this from?

and I also said that I could see how the calls would be annoying for OP when she is busy.

Take your anger out on someone else and stop making things up about people you don't know.

[Nairobe]

Yambu. Why not leave each other voice watsapp instead, that way you can listen when you chose.

[gruffaloschildgonewild]

Get wireless earphones. That way you can talk to hime whilst shouting at your kids at the same time. He will soon learn that mornings wont be that lovey dovey chatty ones that he imagined. Romance is not supposed to make your life difficult. For me romance would be my partner turning up in the morning as surprise and taking care of the kids routine whilst I have breakfast in peace.

[TowelNumber42]

How has the weekend with him been @MrsNacho?

[calpop]

Why is this an issue?. Just dont answer the phone if its not convenient. My mother used to do this, it drove me mad. I had young kids and she would phone at 6 on the dot when she got home from work and i was in the middle of tea and baths. I asked her once why always 6 on the dot, after having explained numerous times it was a really hectic time for me. Her answer was basically that she was getting it out of the way early so that she wasnt interupted while the soaps were on. I never answered the phone to her in the early evening again. After a few weeks of me deliberately calling her back in the middle of Coronation Street it soon stopped and now we speak later in the evening, convenient for everyone.

[Mememeplease]

He's disrespectful. I can't get over all the posters who think it's sweet.

It's not sweet. He's not listening to you and that is not good. But it's also worrying that you are doubting yourself and haven't already stopped it by sharply pulling him up on it.

I'd think about your boundaries in the rest of your relationship too. I suspect there are more red flags that you might not be recognising yet.

[TakemedowntoPotatoCity]

When I first read your op and thought he was your long term partner and the kids were his I had a smidgen of sympathy. Now he just seems annoying and needy, and potentially controlling. Be aware. He has very little.idea what morning running around kids are like, and if he can't be sympathetic to this it's not a good sign.

[MrsNacho]

We have had a lovely weekend, we always do when we are together, no problems there. He is just needy when he is away.

Meeting up in a little while to take DS and ExDSD to the park. (My exes daughter, sister of my son).

[MrsNacho]

I haven't brought it up again as we discussed it when he rang last time (when I started the therad).

Will leave it at that unless he calls again.

[SimonJT]

My ex travelled a lot and would call me everyday, however I liked it, if I didn’t it would have been annoying.

Is he more responsive if you suggest a rule, e.g call on a Tuesday at x time? If it’s a mobile you can set it to go straight to voicemail.

[Crabby10]

Leave him at home for a week with the kids and u go and stay in a hotel and go out all day 9 to 5 then come back to ur home at the weekend see how he likes it