To wish women would stop being such bitches to other women!!!

[PIPERHELLO]

I have two recent examples:

1. A friend - close friend - who is a raving feminist most of the time (good start) recently got together with a guy who is married. They relationship 'overlapped' with the marriage for a few months until he finally moved out of the martial home and straight into hers. Shit behaviour to the wife by both IMHO. But this friend is now ranting about the STBX wife how she is such a bitch, a psycho, how her bf was so unhappy, no sex etc etc. She has never met the STBXW. This clever, well-educated feminist friend has just lapped it all up form him and is now spouting it to me, not stopping to question the fact that there might be two sides to it etc. And now she's predictably telling her new bf he must get STBX wife to sell the house, reduce his maintenance payments etc. Unbelievable. So fucking cliched. FFS grow up you stupid woman!!!!!!

1. A not so feminist friend came round for a chat last week. Told me how 'a good baby group friend' from when their kids was young recently got divorced. Told me all about the breakup, telling me that this woman 'did nothing' in the marriage. That her husband (an alpha male) worked all hours and provided so well for her, and yet she couldn't - yes couldn't even be bothered(!) to put a meal on the table for him in the evenings. No meal on the table, no washing done, no house cleaned despite the fact that SHE DIDN"T WORK (oh, sorry, she had a new baby at the time, forgot to mention that MINOR FUCKING FACT!). FFS!! This woman (the one telling me) is mid-30s with a career and a daughter. Jesus fucking wept!!! that is the attitude of a well-educated career woman with a daughter. Scary!

What hope is there for the future of woman kind with this sort shit being spouted from 'feminists'.

FFFFFS!

Rant over. Excuse the language. Feeling sweary. Must try harder, what poor English! ;) But you get the gist.

Please can you give me examples of more uplifting examples of behaviour from women who do support other women better than this to GIVE ME HOPE!!!

Thanks! PH

Sounding a little testerical there OP calm down.

Why do people even feel the need to point out that women can be bastards too ? Who didn't know this ?

I have no problem with the word bitch. Are all gendered insults banned ? Cock, wanker, prick i suppose these are all unacceptable too ?

A feminist is someone who fights for women's rights, not necessarily someone who puts another woman's happiness before her own.

Anique105 Thu 21-Mar-19 14:57:54
I'll say this again and again. Men are the better species. Have had different experiences through work, friendships, life in general and always had the nastiest times from women.

Most terrorists are men. Most criminals are men. Clearly terrorism, murder, rape, child abuse, violence, etc. are of little significance to you in comparison to a woman saying "Boo!".

Most terrorists are men. Most criminals are men. Clearly terrorism, murder, rape, child abuse, violence, etc.

Yeah but practically everything that has benefited the human race was conceived and produced or built by men, so do they win out in the end ? Since many of us would otherwise actually be dead and all.

There is no point in engaging with posters who say "men are the better species" obviously.

OP are you aware feminism is a broad church?

In my life I've had my worse most discriminatory experience from other women, on the other hand I've had the most useful help in fighting that discrimination was from other women.

In short people are people regardless of their sex.

I've been on the receiving end of horrific abuse from men: starting with my father, which set the pattern for other abusive events later in life.

My saviours have always been women. Women are often wonderful to other women in times of hardship - the ones I met when going through a spate of miscarriages were near-strangers to me, but no one else could possibly have helped and supported me the way these people did. Without them I could well have gone crazy. Women can band together and exclude, sure, but I'd far rather be excluded by a bunch of people I probably don't want to interact with anyway than be physically assaulted, concussed, raped, stalked, sexually harrassed or seriously intimidated. I'm not being frivolous. All the above have happened to me at the hands of men. And men are the overwhelming cause of injury to women; not vice versa.

I find it bizarre to see men referred to as a 'species'. They're not. Humanity is. And much as we often like to 'otherize' the monster, humanity doesn't really vary all that much.

WhenWillItAllEnd, you seem confused. The criteria used was bad behaviour.

As soon, as I read the title and use of 'bitches' you lost any sympathy.

Nearly all my friends are female and they are all wonderful, lovely, inspiring people. Some examples: they have come to my rescue during difficult times of my life - taking it in turns to stay the night with me so I didn’t have to spend a night alone after a bereavement, setting up a rota for making sure I had dinner in the evening, cancelling their own plans to come and look after me.

They have helped and encouraged my career plans - letting me practice my interview questions and presentations on them, building up my confidence and celebrating with me when things have gone well.

They have done countless thoughtful small things, like sending cards for important life events, making the effort to visit me when I temporarily moved miles away, buying me small gifts just because they thought I’d like them, recommending books, films and programmes on topics they know that interest me.

I have also been cheated on by two different men (with other women, one who knew me) and was bullied at school by a horrible girl at primary and a different horrible girl at secondary. Funnily enough I never jumped to the conclusion that “women are bitches”. There are always bad apples in any group of people, don’t let that blind you to the brilliantness of the majority.

P.s. most violence is committed by men, I have been undermined at work countless times by men and every time a woman gets with another woman’s husband there is a MAN who is breaking his wedding vows and breaking the heart of the woman he is supposed to love and cherish.

"practically everything that has benefited the human race was conceived and produced or built by men,"

This is bonkers. And not true. And ignores the fact that for most of human history women and girls were prevented from engaging in education or any activities that would enable them to achieve. And if they did so despite this, their achievements were stolen and appropriated by men.

Assassinated Beauty, good point. The real discoverer of the double helix structure of DNA was Rosalind Franklin. That information came from her photographs. It's a tragic irony that Crick and Watson took full credit for her discovery, together with a Nobel prize. In the meantime she died of ovarian cancer, possibly as a result of exposure to the x-rays through which she took her photographs.

Another OP to shit all over women. If I was a conspiracy theorist, which I’m not, I would wonder what the motive was behind the OP.

My friends are awesome, we aren't like this at all

My husbands friends however, all male and what a load of bitchy gossips they are. It so weird, thankfully my husband doesn't get involved (much) but I've seen some of their group chat and it's beyond childish

You've got to make sure you call people out though and don't listen to the crap or it'll just continue

I think women can be incredibly unfriendly to other women.

Just look at how many threads there are on here from new mums who have been ignored at baby groups and are upset.

Go to a gym and look at the guys in the weights section. They will all be chatting to each other...if I as a woman started a conversation with another woman in the gym, I can guarantee she'd look at me like I'm crazy.

Even just looking at my own dc and their friendships...my ds and his friends have such incredible loyalty and camaraderie...they rarely fall out and if they do, it is forgotten about straight away.

Depends on the type of people you hang out with. My main friendship group is 2 other women and one gay man. They're all lovely and would never be nasty about anyone.

if I as a woman started a conversation with another woman in the gym, I can guarantee she'd look at me like I'm crazy

I start random conversations on a frequent basis..ive had some good chats

they rarely fall out and if they do, it is forgotten about straight away

This isnt a sex thing

Im like this with my friends and ds1 is currently in the middle of a huge falling out with his house mates

In both of your examples, it's the men who have done the damage. First, the one who cheated on his wife. Second, the one who left the mother of his child because she didn't make him dinner. So why the focus on what women get up to?

Women are individuals and will say and do whatever they want. We don't all have to subscribe to some sort of rule book just because we all have vaginas. I agree with you that the women in your post sound pretty vile, but their behaviour isn't worse because they are women. They are just being twats. It isn't a gender thing. Stop pushing these expectations onto people. There will always be twats, it's not about gender.

If we're paying attention to anecdote, I've come across a fair few male friendship groups that were superficially harmonious because there was an unspoken agreement that some members of the group would take constant crap in the name of humour. Joking around, all mates together, that's how blokes are - but it's only funny if everyone's laughing. My dad was amazed to find out, years later, that one of his best mates from his 20s and 30s had actually disliked him.. Apparently my dad's constant "banter" (e.g. always addressing him by a nickname mocking his weight instead of his real name) had done a lot more damage than he realised. But, on the face of it, their friendship group would have looked like a good example of "men just get on with it and don't have drama with their friends like women do" .

This is bonkers. And not true.

It is absolutely true, you might opine that women would have done the same or more if they only got the chance, but that is opinion. Look out the window wherever you are saying and everything you are more or less will have been put there by men for a purpose conceived by men.

This doesn't make men "better" than women.

I'm confused as to why gendered insults are only permissable for men though ?

Saying = sitting some typos there.

Men are far more likely to murder or main each other, I would say this is worse than a bit of "bitchyness"

Pointing out that men are disproportionately responsible for acts of violence isn't a gendered insult, it's a fact. And male violence was only mentioned in response to the "men are the better species" poster, so it was a fair point in context.

I'm confused as to why gendered insults are only permissible for men though?

I don't understand this point at all. The most taboo word in this language is one relating to female anatomy. Language in general is more taboo, insulting and derogatory when it relates to women and women's bodies than it ever has been in relation to men.

What is the male equivalent of 'slut?' First clue: there isn't one; unless you count 'rake' which is only very mildly insulting by comparison. When did you last hear of 'rake-shaming?' No, me neither.

If you still remain to be convinced: compare 'prick' and 'cunt'.