To choose a restaurant I want to go to for Mothering Sunday?

[IdaIdes]

I made a reservation for the 4 of us to go to a pub lunch for Mothering Sunday ages ago. DHs ex has asked if we can have the kids over that weekend as she's going somewhere which of course was a yes. But they won't eat a pub lunch. They will only eat out at pizza express or Nando's neither of which I'm terribly keen on going to for Mothering Sunday! DH thinks let them sulk at the table and we will feed them something else when we get home. So I guess my AIBU is that reasonable? Or should we just pack it in?

And why aren't the kids spending Mothering Sunday witht heir own mum???

I think you have confused the word picky with bratty op.

If they're that fussy they can wait till they get home. I wouldn't make a big deal of trying to pressure them to eat I'd let them know what the menu is and say they're welcome to a snack before we go if they don't want to what's available.

ergh leave them at home!

will only eat pizza express at 16?! Christ.

leave them at home

easy

with a pizza express pizza in the fridge, if you feel charitable

I guess she means the only pizza he will eat is dominos, not that he lives off Dominos pizza.

I would just tell them where you're going and ask if they want to join you or not.

OR

Would you go with your two kids and your husband stay at home with the other two? Or wouldn't you both like that?

Why did he say yes when you already had plans that he knew they wouldn’t like?
Couldn’t he have said no.

I wouldn't have an issue with my teens not spending Mothers Day with me.
Quite the opposite
Not a big deal here. I prefer to be appreciated all year round.

@Order654 Tue 19-Mar-19 16:50:06
Why did he say yes when you already had plans that he knew they wouldn’t like?
Couldn’t he have said no.

Obv not, it seems like these kids don't hear that often often enough tbh.

yesterday it was my birthday and I really fancied an Indian which neither of my kids really eat / like. My kids are 18 and 13 - both of them agreed that as it was my "special day" I should get to have whatever I wanted. They both agreed to try some new things. One had a chicken korma which they have had before and we ordered a mixed grill for the other which went down a treat. Children should not be dictating to this level IMO and such childish behaviour shouldn't be tolerated unless there is a very good underlying reason like autism or something.

DH thinks let them sulk at the table and we will feed them something else when we get home.

Your D is the parent here, be guided by him

TBH I'd sack the over priced pub lunch and go the following week when prices drop back

I thought you were going to say that your DH insists you rearrange to suit his kids but no, he says you should do what you want and let them sulk. Wow!

Is the 4 of you you booked for initially including the step children then?

I think they sound like spoilt brats. Eating out was a rare treat when I was a kid and of course we went where my parents said. If I'd tried to say I would 'only' eat at any particular place, I'd have got very short shrift indeed. Sixteen and twelve and and throwing their weight around like a toddler? Away with them. Leave them at home with a takeaway menu and go where you want to go.

It's kind of sad that their Mum doesn't want them on Mother's Day sad

She's clearly fed up with their gastronomic tantrums although she has been enabling it for years!

I really fancied an Indian

Was it Sendhil Ramamurthy? I fancy him too.

16 and 12! I thought you were going to say 6 and 2, and agree with all the other posts that all pubs do kids food, usually something and chips.

At that age, you don’t need to pander to them. Either give them the choice of coming with you, and accepting the pub meal, or they can stay at home, and you enjoy your meal out.

They'd be left at home so my meal wouldn't be spoilt by sulky brats.

Leave them at home! This is the one day where you get to make any demand that you want
Let the spoiled brats know that they rank at the bottom of this little pecking order and they can either come and be happy or stay at home.

16 and 12?! they can watch you eat and enjoy yourself. Spoilt brats.

It's really not doing them any favours to not be able to eat in a chain pub. My kids don't like Indian takeaways, but both will now eat tandoori chicken and pilau rice. They're not fussed on Chinese either, but will have chicken chow mien and egg fried rice. It's about teaching kids to cope if they're fussy, find things on the menu they will eat.

I'd get a copy of the menu, they either come with you and choose something (and sit there without making a fuss) or leave them at home with a frozen Pizza Express pizza.

I have a child that will only eat pizza (she’s 15), we still eat out and she either has to find something she will eat (chips or pizza) or she goes without. I agree with your dh, take them and they either chose something or they don’t eat, at 12 and 16 they are old enough to realise they can’t always have pizza or Nando’s (Nando’s is grim anyway).

They have a choice to make.

Explain that it was booked before you knew they were coming. It's for mothers day and you want to go there as it's your treat. Say you'd love them to come but it's really up to them if they want to come and eat chips or if they want to stay at home as you know they aren't keen on the food.

Then you aren't dictating. It's up to them. They know they are welcome to join in with your plans - or not.

Ex is probably taking her DM out for mother’s day and doesn’t want her Whiney kids in tow!

Christ if I told my mum (at ANY age) that I wouldn't eat somewhere and I'd only eat pizza from specific places she would say one thing:

Tough titties

Keep your booking, they can stay home if they're that bothered. (Or if you don't want to ruin your day with sulky teen/pre-teen!)