Sending this to my neighbour?

[Andromeida59]

Hi, we have Muslim neighbours that we say hello too, take in post for etc. I feel so horrified by the attacks in Christchurch that I want to send a card to them with not only condolences but also just a message of solidarity that should they ever experience any negativity, we are with them and would help where we can.

I know they celebrate the religious festivals and have wished them Eid Mubarak before etc. but I don't know if this is over stepping the mark.

Thoughts? AIBU

Wtf? Bit weird to group all Muslims together like that. I would take very mild offence to that (I’m not Muslim anymore but my family was and I can tell you that Muslims are just as divided as Christians and most don’t have this Muslims against the world view). Are you Christian? The equivalent would be your aunt from Germany sending you a condolence card after the Manchester bombing. Don’t be the ignorant white woman from next door.

I would take very mild offence to that

Really, though? You'd take offense at someone's well intentioned act of sympathy?

I find that a bit unfair and maybe the fear of offending makes others not reach out when they'd like to.

“Don’t be the ignorant white woman from next door.”

No. Be the white woman from next door who is prepared to stand up and say “You are safe with me. If you are afraid to go out, I will go out with you or for you. This was not done in my name”

@HarrysOwl you clearly missed the bit where I am an apostate. I still get people trying to call me Muslim (yes we know you don’t practice but your parents were Muslim so you are too-I’m not, itsnot a race). I would imagine that if they follow a different brand of Islam it may be similarly irritating. The divisions inisl can run deep. My parents never liked because lumpedwoth Arabic muslims for instance. They were nothing like that. Come to think of it you could call them muslims in the same sense as the poor people that died in that mosque. It would be like saying catholics and Protestants are the same. Muslims are not all one big group. It’s offensive to act like they are.

@bertrandrussell ffs not everyone is so wet as to care. Seriously, you are all displayongmassive middle class white prejudice here. You dont get it.

crinch

I know this is well intented but they didn't know the people on NZ. I really would not.

No, they didn’t know the people in NZ. But they will know plenty of people who have suffered racial abuse and who will suffer more racial abuse because incidents like this give the green light to racists. Nothing wrong with showing a bit of solidarity.

It's a bit 'them and us' isn't it? Sending a card to someone because people of the same religion as them were killed on the other side of the world. Intentions are good yes but i think it further perpetuates a divide tbh. Just carry on as normal. Have a brew with them and a chat now and then like you would any other neighbour, regardless of race/religion.

Muslims are not all one big group. It’s offensive to act like they are

That's a very fair point.

@BigFatGiant my point still stands; I think you'd be of a hard heart to not see the genuine care that the OP is displaying, it's about reaching out through prejudice and the perceived fractions in our society, that's no bad thing, surely?

BertrandRussell

I was thinking of the 30 Nigerian Christian very recently murdered, the reports about the Utrecht gunman seem conflicted about the rmotivation behind that terrorist attack.

You are talking about windows, I am talking about cemeteries vandalised, school kids assaulted, racists and hate messages spray painted on walls. I am talking about female muslims targeted by extremist "muslims" - if they even deserve to be called that name.

The terrorists in France didn't seem to act only against a certain religious group - apart from the attack in that church - but that doesn't really make me feel much safer frankly!

So this whole strange is very odd, and I get the meaning well, but it's patronising and uncomfortable to put everybody in the same bag.

I don’t know anything about the religious/ethnic make up of the Philippines. But if Christians are a small but visible minority and we’re targetted by Muslim terrorists, and if I was a Muslim with Christian neighbours, I hope I would do my best to reassure them that I at least was safe and had their backs.

Whilst putting out the dustbins I bumped into my neighbour who is Muslim and asked her what she would think if I had sent her a card of solidarity. She said: 'If I didn't know you better I'd think you'd lost your marbles. It's a bit cringey, why would you do that? Are you expecting a card from me when some Islamic nutters bomb some Christians?' I assured her I wasn't.

Bert I really am not sure I like where you’re going with that. Are you saying that Christians need to reach out to let Muslim neighbours know they are not terrorists? And by the same token, should Muslim neighbours reach out to reassure local Christians they are not terrorists??

Yeah, course you did, SilverySurfer. Course you did!

No don’t very weird and looks massively try hard like you are making a point about not having an issue with them. Live and let live. You don’t need to make an issue out of anything

“Are you saying that Christians need to reach out to let Muslim neighbours know they are not terrorists?“

Nope. I am saying that Muslims are in a tiny minority in this country, and the increasing levels of racism may very well be making them feel threatened and unwelcome. A massive incident like this might be an opportunity to let a Muslim neighbour know that you are on their side, not on the side of the racists.

Asmara will be thrilled to learn that she is, in fact, a figment of my imagination. Carry on with your virtue signally, it's obvious you're an expert.

🤣

Bert I’d be mortified to think that didn’t go without saying!

Yay! Virtue signaling- Bingo!!

“Bert I’d be mortified to think that didn’t go without saying!”

Sadly, it doesn’t.

“Virtue signalling- a term tht seeks to ridicule the ideas of altruism and generosity by suggesting that they are only ever undertaken in a search for admiration”

Virtue signaling. Talking a good game but not actually doing anything.

Even though you’ve got the best intentions, I have to agree with a lot of PPs. It just comes across a bit David Brent - you know how in his rush to appear cool and woke he ended up being appallingly racist? It suggests that because they’re Muslims you see them as part of a homogenous group of ‘others’ when actually the planet’s 1.5 billion Muslims are just as diverse - possibly more diverse - than its 2 billion Christians.

Like i said before. As a muslim myself. I woukd understand the intention. Fine no problem. But then my sense of anxiety at 1am would kick in and make me wander if others see me differently and i should now be worried that i might get abused or attacked because of what happened in Nz that my neighbour felt the need to highlight that i am muslim and this awful thing happened. Just carry on being a nice neighbour. Mention the attack in person in a chat but dont send the card please. Its also strange as the person the card is for did not know those in the attack!