Sending this to my neighbour?

[Andromeida59]

Hi, we have Muslim neighbours that we say hello too, take in post for etc. I feel so horrified by the attacks in Christchurch that I want to send a card to them with not only condolences but also just a message of solidarity that should they ever experience any negativity, we are with them and would help where we can.

I know they celebrate the religious festivals and have wished them Eid Mubarak before etc. but I don't know if this is over stepping the mark.

Thoughts? AIBU

“that chestnut is that it's extremely offensive to put everyone in the same bag”

If it was me, I wouldn’t be offering condolences. I would be saying something which meant “I understand that this awful thing must have shaken your feeing of safety and trust. I want to tell you that I am one of the people you can be sure of”

Would you send it to non Muslim neighbours following a terrorist attack by Muslim extremists? I doubt it! You are a very kind person but I wouldn’t send a card.

“Would you send it to non Muslim neighbours following a terrorist attack by Muslim extremists?”
No I wouldn’t. But then my non Muslim neighbours wouldn’t be members of a minority group with reason to be worried about how this particular atrocity might bring some vermin out of the darkness.

You sound lovely, OP, but I wouldn't no.

I am French though wasn't directly impacted by the terrorist attacks (living far away from the different places it occurred) and received a bunch of condolences from foreign friends when it occurred. It was nice but also a bit odd because it wasn't my place to receive those messages, I wasn't really a victim.

Like people said it's akin to someone sending a card to a random white person after 9/11 that didn't even live in NYC or knew anyone there, it's a bit strange.

I would be slightly mortified if someone sent me a condolence and support card in relation to the murder of someone of colour (I am mixed) from another country under the pretense that we are "similar".

And while I would know their heart is in the right place I would think it shows some "me/them" mentality.

Oh my word, no.

Wondering if people are thinking a bit differently after 4 mosques had their windows smashed overnight.
I repeat, not condolence. Solidarity.

I wouldn't

Seems condescending to me.

Have they sent you cards when Christians have been murdered by Islamics?

“Have they sent you cards when Christians have been murdered by Islamics?”

What incidents did you have in mind?

I googled and found this: www.thereligionofpeace.com/attacks/christian-attacks.aspx

Take your pick.

my non Muslim neighbours wouldn’t be members of a minority group with reason to be worried

with the very recent past of attacks against Christians, the dangerous raise of anti-semitism, there are many people who have very valid reasons to be very worried.

Solidarity when your neighbours actual place of worship is being targeted is one thing - or when the kids from the local faith school are being targeted too.
For a terrorist attack at the other side of the globe, nope, still not comfortable with that.

5 mosques vandalized last night......

@SilverySurfer- my Internet provider won’t let me look at the website you linked to. Which is a little worrying. To say the least.

Red rose are a stronge symbol of support I wouldn’t unless I knew them well however our local mosque has received flowers and are opening their doors tomorrow to all faiths to show unity.

and what about the jewish cemetery being vandalised?

I am not trying to start a competition, just pointing out that hate crimes are - very unfortunately - very present at the moment.

I am still very uncomfortable with letters to neighbours about events happening at the other side of the globe, lumping everyone in the same bag is exactly what haters do.

BertrandRussell
What incidents did you have in mind?

stop being goady.

“stop being goady.”

I’m not being goady. I’m just asking for examples of terrorist atrocities directed at Christians which might make a Christian neighbour of mine feel insecure and unwelcome.

Just after the attack in NZ, there was a Christian man who stood outside the local mosque holding a sign that said "I am your friend" That was very well received.
This may well be outing but never mind. Our local delivery man is Asian at first he was very quiet very pleasant but shy. We talked to him about the weather things like that. Very gradually he started to initiate conversation and became much more relaxed.
At Christmas he gave us a beautiful Christmas card saying thank you,
and a box of biscuits. I was so struck by his kindness it brought a tear to my eye.
The point of this post is to say, if you want to show you care, do what you want to do. I don't think anyone would think you were being patronising, (and in my view, at the moment one of the most overused words in the English language) Stand up and be counted!

And the man in Manchester, I think, outside the mosque with the sign saying “I will watch while you pray”

Kind thought, but no!

BertrandRussell
@SilverySurfer- my Internet provider won’t let me look at the website you linked to. Which is a little worrying. To say the least.

I've no idea why that might be - I found it by googling. Below are just the 2019 entries of a very long list going back to 2001. Sorry the formatting is all over the place but hopefully you can get the gist.

Date Country City Killed Injured Description
2019.03.17 Burkina Faso Djibo 3 1 A priest is kidnapped and three security personnel are killed by militant Islamists.
2019.03.11 Nigeria Anguwan Gamu 46 0 A pastor and his wife are among forty-six villagers massacred by Fulani terrorists.
2019.03.10 Nigeria Shuwa 0 1 A girl is injured when two suicide bombers detonate prematurely during an attempt to kill church-goers.
2019.02.26 Nigeria Maro 32 0 Thirty-two people are killed in a targeted attack on a Christian community.
2019.02.15 Burkina Faso Cinkansé 1 0 A Catholic missionary is shot to death by Muslim radicals.
2019.02.10 Nigeria Angwan Barde 10 0 An unborn child is among ten Catholics massacred by Muslim militants.
2019.01.27 Philippines Jolo 27 111 Twenty-seven worshippers at a Catholic church are laid out by Muslim bombers.
2019.01.26 Germany Salzgitter-Lebenstedt 1 0 The shooting by a Syrian Muslim of an Iraqi Christian is said to be motivated by religious differences.
2019.01.20 CAR Zaoro Sangou 13 0 A pastor is among a dozen killed during Fulani violence.
2019.01.05 Egypt Nasr City 1 2 A bomb left outside a church kills a police officer.

And the man in Manchester, I think, outside the mosque with the sign saying “I will watch while you pray”

That's so, so touching.

Patronising, apparantly, @HarrysOwl....

Send the card if you must but if you have any Christian neibours also send them a card for the 20 dead and 100 injured in the Philippines church bombing about 6 weeks before.
People do evil things whether they be Muslim, Christian or other and you could find yourself needing a big box of cards.

I think you'd have to have a pretty hard heart to find any negative in that kind, thoughtful sentiment.

The extremists (on both/all sides) count on the hate and friction caused by their actions to wedge everyone further apart.

I think the OP has it spot on to reach out with kindness, good on you OP. You sound lovely.

“Send the card if you must but if you have any Christian neibours also send them a card for the 20 dead and 100 injured in the Philippines church bombing about 6 weeks before.”
Is that going to make Christians in the U.K. scared to leave their houses? Were the windows broken in 5 Christian churches in the U.K. last night?