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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Aibu with shop assistants comment 'wrecking the place'

614 replies

Harmonyrays · 16/03/2019 10:59

Browsing in a large charity shop wuth a toddler pottering about. In the childs section, i was looking at books while she was looking at toys getting things out admittedlt leaving 3 or 4 on the floor. I was just turning aeound to pick them hp when an assistant came over and said 'could you please not let your child wreck the place'.

Thoughts please as im annoyed at the comment as shes a very yound child who was doing what kids do, i was close by ready to put things away and was going to help the charity by buying several items.

OP posts:
Harmonyrays · 16/03/2019 11:00

Sorry for typos on the phone

OP posts:
twinkle999 · 16/03/2019 11:00

YABU

WellErrr · 16/03/2019 11:01

YABU. You need to control your child when you’re in a shop, and teach them not to get things out and drop them on the floor!
Poor shop assistant who has to clear it all up.

Absolutely staggered that you think it’s ok for your child to do this in a shop.

Merryoldgoat · 16/03/2019 11:01

The assistant could’ve phrased it better but I wouldn’t let a toddler take toys off shelves etc.

regularbutpanickingabit · 16/03/2019 11:01

It’s a shop, not a library or a play area. Yabu.

JellyBook · 16/03/2019 11:02

She jumped the gun a bit, but she’s probably experienced these parents who let their kids roam free and wreck the joint while happily ignoring them.

Fatasfook · 16/03/2019 11:03

It’s s shop! Of course yabu, and entitled. As well as not teaching your child to behave in shops.

ColeHawlins · 16/03/2019 11:03

YABU.

It's your job to stop your toddler taking multiple toys out and leaving them on the floor. It's one of the benefits of using a buggy IME.

ZippyBungleandGeorge · 16/03/2019 11:04

I agree with PPs it's a shop not stay and play. YABU

PurpleDaisies · 16/03/2019 11:05

You are being completely unreasonable.

CluedoAddict · 16/03/2019 11:05

YABU you need to supervise your child.

AtrociousCircumstance · 16/03/2019 11:05

She expressed herself rudely.

MitziK · 16/03/2019 11:06

A charity shop is not a playground.

ScreamingValenta · 16/03/2019 11:07

I think 'wreck the place' sounds harsh and exaggerated for what happened - very over-dramatic.

It was reasonable for her to say something, but she should just have been factual - 'please could you stop your child leaving the toys on the floor' would have been a sensible thing to say.

GruciusMalfoy · 16/03/2019 11:09

Sorry, YABU. Shops need to keep a clear floor.

rose789 · 16/03/2019 11:09

YABU

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 16/03/2019 11:09

Oh here we go the Judgemental brigade.

FFS it was a child playing with a few toys. Hardly makes her a delinquent in the making,does it

ThisMustBeMyDream · 16/03/2019 11:09

She had no idea you were not buying those items. She should have asked politely. There is no need for rudeness.

Luckingfovely · 16/03/2019 11:10

Yup YA totally BU.

Precious first child much?

Spotsmum · 16/03/2019 11:11

You were being very unreasonable. What if someone had tripped over the toys? You are responsible for your child. The shop assistant could have phrased it better, but she was likely a volunteer and has to watch feckless parents allow this day in, day out. Please have consideration for others.

littletreasure2017 · 16/03/2019 11:12

I disagree on this one, I don't think you were unreasonable I think she sounded rude xxx

Madein1995 · 16/03/2019 11:13

YABU.

She's probably encountered lots of parents who let their children pull things about, run around, drop things etc. I know I did in a supermarket. Parents letting their kids eat the (to be weighed) pick n mix, or worse, put their hands in the stands and eat them. Pull things about, drop jars, run about, leave then alone while they try on clothes etc.

It's a common thing in retail for some parents to behave like this and leave their children to roam. While by no means the majority, its common enough to cloud people's views. Letting your child pull things about and leave them in the floor, isn't ok. It might be what kids do, and it might be ok in a nursery, crèche, home, child's section of a library. A shop is none of those things. It doesn't matter that she's a young child, or it's what children do. It's not a nursery where children are allowed to do those things.

From her perspective, your child was pulling out toys while you were looking at books and not intervening. Most parents I've encountered would have walked off without tidying. As you weren't stopping your child, presumably and understandably, she thought you the same.

No one expects children to behave perfectly. They tantrum, cry, shout, it's normal and expected. What's also expected Is that parents control their children

LoudBatPerson · 16/03/2019 11:17

YABU. It sounds like you were letting your child get out multiple toys and play with things whilst you browsed a different section.

It is absolutely not ok for a child to get out multiple items in a shop, play with them and leave them on the floor.

You should have stepped in once the first item was left out, not wait till there 3/4.

VampirateQueen · 16/03/2019 11:17

YABU, do you even know how annoying it is when people let their kids take stuff off the shelves and not put them back? Then if you don't put it away immediately someone falls over it and complains or another kids comes along and takes more off. It is a Nightmare and makes a thankless job even more difficult to do, shop staff have more to do than pick up after your child.
You may have had the intention of picking them up but not every parent does and the shop assistant doesn't know that you will. Your child was probably the 5th or 6th to do it that day, just teach them to look and not touch.

Mmmmbrekkie · 16/03/2019 11:18

So you didn’t help the charity because of this?

Bloody hell YABU