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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I broke DHs glasses

325 replies

LellowYedbetter · 01/03/2019 10:10

I live in a family of gog botherers, both of my sons and DH but I’m not although should be but I never went back.
Anyway DH is fiercely protective of his and if you go anywhere near them or touch them he panics and flaps. Last night he’d left them on the bedside table. I went to bed, was very tired and didn’t feel well and put the iPad on the bedside table in the dark on top of the glasses forgetting they were there. We both went to sleep. In the middle of the night I woke up, couldn’t get back to sleep so reached for the iPad, dragged it off the table and smeared his glasses. This morning they were all bent and he’s gone ape shit. I mean, proper meltdown, panicking, ignoring me as he was too flustered and ended up late for work.

AIBU to think this obsession is too much?? Or is it because I don’t wear them that I don’t get it?

OP posts:
ilikemethewayiam · 01/03/2019 11:41

He should put them in something to protect them from getting broken. His responsibility if he knows you are clutsy or careless. I have a hubby who is clutsy and careless and has broken a few things of mine so I now keep anything precious to me out of his reach, especially something as important as glasses which you are dependent on. You have apologised and should offer to put right the damage. That should be the end of it.

I’m confused as to why you prefaced your post with ‘he’s a God botherer’. It doesn’t appear relevant to your question!

GabsAlot · 01/03/2019 11:41

@aliwantisagoodnightssleep im the same presciption have to spend loads aswell or i look silly

op some of us need them to function and we dont appreciate the gog botherers four eyes or any other name

diddl · 01/03/2019 11:44

"wouldn’t be able to pin toon with something plastic stuck to my face"

pin toon?

Can you actually see what you're posting???

It does seem daft of him to not use a case if you're clumsy.

Amibeingnaive · 01/03/2019 11:48

And trust me love, if you were -11+ like I am, you'd get over your sensory issues because you wouldn't be able to see otherwise. The luxury of choice.

I didn't like having to wear heavy glasses at the age of 5 much, but I did like being able to read, so I dealt with it.

It's a bit like an able-bodied person saying they couldn't bear to sit in a wheelchair all day, because they don't like sitting for too long. A pointless comment.

NannyRed · 01/03/2019 11:49

I fear I’d be technically blind without my glasses, I’d be furious if someone destroyed my spectacles through their own carelessness. My varifocals cost severely hundred pounds, so if you broke them because you dragged your iPad over them, yes I’d be flaming mad.

Clumsy is a poor excuse for inconsiderate and lazy in these circumstances. Yabvvvu

GabsAlot · 01/03/2019 11:49

he shouldnt have to use a case for glasses he wears all the time

op u should haveanother test whther or not you have sensory issues going on you co9ld be driving illegally

Amibeingnaive · 01/03/2019 11:50

And I'm dyspraxic, so I am constantly breaking things. If I accidentally break something of someone else's I apologise profusely and replace immediately. I don't call them obsessive, because I'm not a dickhead.

VanGoghsDog · 01/03/2019 11:53

gog botherers????

Obsessed?

Nah - go near my glasses and you'd be history. They cost £500 and I cannot do anything without them. So, I'm on his side here. Stay away from them.

Oh, and go back to bloody optician and get your eyes sorted if you were supposed to have glasses, it's not cool to go around unable to see, especially if you drive.

carrotflinger · 01/03/2019 11:55

I live in a family of gog botherers, both of my sons and DH but I’m not although should be but I never went back.

So rude. Unbelievable. I don't care if your DH and his family say that about themselves - it's rude and offensive and coming on here writing that just got my back up and offended a load of other people who also have to wear glasses.

Of course he went apeshit - it's not an obsession. Why on earth would you write that? He needs them to see. If his glasses are broken he isn't going to be able to drive to work/walk to work/carry out his work.
Glasses cost a small fortune as well.
Accidents do happen (though I've never managed to smash mine yet, or someone else smash them through carelessness) but you don't have to belittle his stress/feelings by posting on mumsnet basically claiming he over-reacted and is "obsessed".
Correct response is to apologize and take him to work (as you did) and then offer to pay for them.

The only thing I don't understand is why his glasses and your ipad ended up on the same bedside table. Were the glasses on "your" side or did you put your ipad on "his" side?

VanGoghsDog · 01/03/2019 11:59

I passed the eye test

It's not that kind of test, it's not 'pass/fail', those of us with glasses didn't 'fail' it!

user1473878824 · 01/03/2019 12:00

OP, haven't you mentioned being worried about money recently? Do you not think, if things are tight, you ought to be grovelling to your DH for breaking something (of his) expensive which NEEDS to be replaced?

mammoon · 01/03/2019 12:01

Of course YABU. I know children who are kinder and more responsible. And what does this even mean? You put the iPad on the bedside table in the dark on top of the glasses forgetting they were there... In the middle of the night I ... reached for the iPad, dragged it off the table and smeared his glasses.

I can't understand how you could fuck his glasses up so badly just by putting an ipad on top of them and taking it off again. Doesn't make sense.

FriarTuck · 01/03/2019 12:02

I'm assuming that the weird and wonderful spelling is because she can't bloody see properly! 'pin toon' - function possibly? 'wading' - reading?
Eyesight changes as you get older. I'm now getting long-sighted though my short-sightedness is getting better!
Get your eyes tested and either wear glasses, lenses, get laser treatment or don't drive. Don't just risk it and blame being clumsy when you run someone over and kill them.

Patr1ckJane · 01/03/2019 12:04

After this and your cake incident thread I think you and your husband should be kinder to each other and get some help

VanGoghsDog · 01/03/2019 12:04

Most chains of Opticians offer a second pair free or discounted price. Make sure your DH has a spare pair.

Not if you have my prescription and need varifocals - they offer single vision, basic lense for the second pair and they are unwearable. Mine cost over £500 so even half price is another £250+, and they only tend to do half price on the frames and you have to spend the same on the lenses - so, it's a headline but it doesn't really work out that way.

ittakes2 · 01/03/2019 12:06

I think its weird you even consider the basic need to see might be considered an obsession.

Clutterbugsmum · 01/03/2019 12:13

I can't understand how you could fuck his glasses up so badly just by putting an Ipad on top of them and taking it off again. Doesn't make sense. My thoughts exactly.

I'm very clumsy and have drop mine countless times on my tiled kitchen floor and they have never broken.

Are you sure he hadn't broken before you put the I Pad on them and is now blaming you.

Lweji · 01/03/2019 12:19

I have an older pair of titanium glasses, but my most recent pairs have suffered a bit and have never been broken. The worst they have suffered were scratches on the lenses when I actually stepped on them on the pavement!

Did you bang the tablet on the glasses, OP? Threw them in anger?

Katlow · 01/03/2019 12:19

It was an accident, you've apologised, offered to drive him to work and presume offered to get them replaced. I don't see what more you can do. I'd probably be peeved too if someone broke something of mine, especially something I needed like glasses (but if they were that vital to my day to day life, I'd definitely have a spare pair in case something happened to them) but it was an accident and accidents happen!

bobstersmum · 01/03/2019 12:20

An obsession about being able to actually see clearly? You sound like a right knob!

viques · 01/03/2019 12:22

WHy have you only got one bedside table between you? Are you living in a 1950 s film with single beds and a table between you?

timeisnotaline · 01/03/2019 12:22

Wow. You breaking his glasses is not equivalent to him calling you joke names referring to your sensory issues. It’s more like he spent all weekend putting stickers on your arm and headbands on your head and winding scarves closely around your neck. Does that sound like fun op? Would you be a bit ‘obsessed’ and want him to stop?
Gogbotherers. Just ugh. I hope I never hear / see that term again.

Kerantli · 01/03/2019 12:22

I'm only a -1/-2 with my eyesight, but even I would be so pissed off if my fiance had broken my glasses, just as he would be with me if I'd broken his (though not as much as his eyes haven't changed in years so he has 3 pairs he can wear right now, whereas I have one pair, two pairs at a push, but one of those pairs is my previous prescription which don't help any more)

I think I remember the other thread of yours were you called them "goggs", and I still think YABVVVVVVVU to call glasses wearers obsessive over their glasses when they need them for a pretty basic need.

CatandtheFiddle · 01/03/2019 12:25

I always have a spare pair of glasses because without them I feel vulnerable and unsafe. Have some compassion. If I break my glasses I can be housebound.

53rdWay · 01/03/2019 12:27

Might the clumsiness and all the typos here be because you do in fact need glasses yourself OP?

Please go and get tested. You can look into laser eye surgery after that. But if you’re driving without glasses when you can’t see well enough then you’re putting people in danger, including yourself and anyone in the car with you.

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