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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Pretending that I did it ...

520 replies

Glitterzzz · 23/02/2019 20:00

So.. I am no chef but I can bake.. my OH asked me for a carrot cake sometime soon.. usually I would be happy to run round the supermarket get the ingredients and stand in the kitchen to turn out a half decent baked delight some hours later

But

I’m tired. It’s half term. I’m run crazy with two children with additional needs, no school or nursery breaks and trying to keep the house and I’m on a diet myself ... so I cheated.

I contacted a cake maker ordered the cake and was gutted to see how professional it looked when I collected it today considering how much u paid for it... in the need to make it seem I baked it lovingly for him I brought it home and have roughed it up a little... ( smudges in the Cream cheese frosting, a dent here a dent there and whizzed up some pecans and walnuts and whacked them on top...

Unfortunately the real baker had gone to the effort of making little sugar paste carrot decorations which she seems to have apples with a orange substance so I removed them and will just say I attempted a decoration that failed...

Does this cake look home made but not too fancy/ professional? Why do I even care ? 😂😂 I guess I love him and wanted to give him something he wanted and of course all the thanks of how lovely it is and how hard I must have worked

Pretending that I did it ...
OP posts:
lisasimpsonssaxophone · 24/02/2019 02:07

That frosting has very obviously been applied using one of those big smoothing tools, with the cake on a turntable. Do you have those things in your house (and know how to use them?) If not then surely he’ll suspect right away. The cake has also been meticulously trimmed and squared-off in a way that most home bakers just really wouldn’t bother doing (unless they’re practising for bake off!) so I honestly find it bonkers that you’re going to try and pass it off as your own amateur baking efforts.

I get wanting to make him happy but surely commissioning a special cake for him would do just that? Wanting to ‘impress’ a long term partner by pretending to be a professional-standard baker just seems so weird to me. Like it’s about scoring points or getting one-up on the other person. But every relationship is different and if this makes you both happy then have at it!

AlexaAmbidextra · 24/02/2019 02:11

But why is it funny? I dont get the joke?

I don’t think it’s roll about, crying with laughter funny. I would probably roll my eyes if one of my friends had done this. But neither do I think it warrants many of the comments that have been forthcoming. People are acting as if it’s a heinous crime instead of something a little bit silly.

Notwotuknow · 24/02/2019 02:13

I think it's a sweet idea, and I understand why you've done it.
You just want your dh to feel valued, lived and appreciated, and you want to please and impress him. Having a homemade cake was something he'd asked for so you've done the next best thing. Nothing wrong with that.

Hope it goes well. Cake

RaffertyFair · 24/02/2019 02:14

So you agree it isnt actually funny?
AlexaAmbidextra

lisasimpsonssaxophone · 24/02/2019 02:14

People are acting as if it’s a heinous crime instead of something a little bit silly.

I agree it’s not a heinous crime and there are worse lies to be found in a relationship, but going to these lengths because you want your partner to give you all the thanks of how lovely it is and how hard I must have worked goes well beyond ‘a little bit silly’ for me.

RaffertyFair · 24/02/2019 02:19

Whereas what Notwotuknow has just posted is definitely laughable:

You just want your dh to feel valued, lived and appreciated, and you want to please and impress him. Having a homemade cake was something he'd asked for so you've done the next best thing.

The next best thing being to pretend and lie ??

Lostwithoutdirections · 24/02/2019 02:20

This made me laugh OP. Hope the cake was delicious. Enjoy the praise 😂

SureTry · 24/02/2019 02:24

I'm just waiting for this to turn up in online news somewhere with a photo of the cake included. Where are the lazy journalists at? Hmm

StoppinBy · 24/02/2019 02:35

@lisasimpsonssaxaphone, a lazy susan is often used in place of a turntable and even without one a cake can be smoothed like that easily. A large offset spatula can be used to smooth the cake rather than a bench scraper - most people have a lazy susan and a spatula so I think you are over thinking those.

I do agree though that the cake is beautifully levelled and have every expectation that each layer inside (assuming four cake layers) is most likely even and levelled so that may be a dead giveaway that the average joe didn't just knock it up in an hour or two lol.

That being said some of you are way too invested in this - who cares if she told her DH a white lie? It wont be the end of the marriage and I am sure if he did find out he would either laugh or string her along and have his own joke as well.

In the future to get a cake board off pop the cake in the freezer just until the icing sets hard then flip it up on a cake, slide a thin spatula or a thin knife between the board and the cake and pop the board off then flip it back over on to the plate you want to serve it on.... or you could just tell DH that you heard about cake boards and decided to use one Wink .
Hope your DH is having a lovely birthday OP.

pineapplebryanbrown · 24/02/2019 02:49

I think you should lick all the icing off and make your own to cover the cake.

Then it's less of a lie.

SilverySurfer · 24/02/2019 03:10

If he's a chef, he may be so impressed that he asks for the recipe Grin

Abacab · 24/02/2019 04:45

Firstly, it sounds almost as if you've put more time and effort and thought into faking this cake than it would have taken you to just bake the damn thing yourself in the first place.

Secondly, men really aren't that bothered about cake. When a man says "I fancy some carrot cake" he isn't saying "I demand that you make a huge romantic gesture to prove how much you love me!". The dude just fancies some carrot cake. It's absolutely fine to say "I don't have time to make one, but I'll get us a nice one from the bakers".

Thirdly, apparently some people are happy to spend £40-60 on a random carrot cake. That's more than my food budget for a week. Who the hell spends £40 on one carrot cake and thinks it's a bargain? You people have a diamond as big as the Ritz do ya?

This forum sure does get weird.

PinkSmitterton · 24/02/2019 06:13

most people have a lazy Susan Shock

We live in different worlds!

(I have always considered them extremely posh, partly because the first time I saw one was at the house of my XBF's very well off friend)

Halo84 · 24/02/2019 06:35

I would tell him after he’s eaten the cake. “Darling, I love you so much and wanted to make you happy. So I bought one for you. I can’t lie to you.”

That cake does look too professional to be homemade, unless you are capable of making professional level cakes. If your husband were not a chef, it would not be an issue. He will know, so best to fess up.

TheKitchenWitch · 24/02/2019 06:35

Wtaf? Just buy him a sodding cake and say here I’ve bought you carrot cake! Why on earth would you lie? Utterly bizarre.

Walkaround · 24/02/2019 07:50

Notwotuknow - Surely you can see what is wrong with your comment, "You just want your dh to feel valued, loved and appreciated, and you want to please and impress him. Having a homemade cake was something he'd asked for so you've done the next best thing."?? In what way is lying because you cannot actually be bothered to make a cake during half term, something that demonstrates your love which should please and impress your dh? If buying the cake for him is insufficient to show you value and love him, then lying about it doesn't change the reality (that you don't actually value and love him enough to do it), and if buying it is enough to show how much you value and love him, then buying it is enough without the pathetic atempt to lie about it. Will it really please and impress her dh that she spent £20 on lying about a cake she obviously did not make herself (he's a former chef, not an idiot)? Is love really the motivation for lying about a cake you could have baked yourself but chose not to?! Love is more likely to be going along with the idiotic pretence so as not to make your dw feel silly for lying in front of you.

BertrandRussell · 24/02/2019 07:55

Missing the point- but I have a fail safe carrot cake recipe that takes 10 minutes max to get in the oven......

tomhazard · 24/02/2019 07:56

I would have told dh I didn't have time for baking and if he was so keen on a particular cake he could do it himself or enjoy the shop bought delight.

Crunchymum · 24/02/2019 08:01

OP, have you made sure you have a cake tin thay size..... if not go and buy one immediately.... to keep up the charade Hmm

BertrandRussell · 24/02/2019 08:03

I think all this subterfuge must have taken at least 4 times as long as actually making a bloody cake.

CaptainBrickbeard · 24/02/2019 08:21

I feel like people are desperate for this thread to be hilarious and zany in an Allison Pearson/Bridget Jones madcap kind of way with all sorts of ker-razy stories shared and a place in Classics - but it misses the mark a little bit and comes across as more sad and pointless than anything else.

PurpleDaisies · 24/02/2019 08:33

This is really strange.

“Most people have a lazy Susan” is what world?

TroysMammy · 24/02/2019 08:34

Of course the cake is homemade. It just wasn't made in the OP's home.

PurpleDaisies · 24/02/2019 08:40

Surely he’ll recognise that as abought cake unless you’re a normally competent baker

NoParticularPattern · 24/02/2019 08:45

This is utterly bonkers. I get that you want to make him happy and all that, but surely being honest and saying “look I just don’t have the time but I’ve bought you a really really nice one from a really well recommended baker” would still make him feel good? Cake is good, it all makes me feel good no matter who baked it. I’d feel a bit weird if I thought someone had lied about having made it though. Especially when up until now their cakes haven’t been exactly professional as, by their own admission, they’re “no baker”. It’s just a bit weird. And the troiblenyouve gone to of faking the washing up is even weirder.