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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think this cafe needs to rethink their message to customers?

708 replies

GunpowderGelatine · 22/02/2019 23:37

Seen this on Facebook today from a cafe -

So we are a dog friendly cafe which is completely acceptable by health and safety as long as the dogs don’t cook your food or enter the kitchen 😡 so don’t give us a hard time if you don’t like dogs because we like dogs better than humans - note don’t give Vicky a hard time over happy dogs because Vicky will always defend the dogs

Now I have a bit of a fear of dogs and wouldn't expect to see one in a cafe and I'd be a bit pissed off if I paid good money for food and drink only to be bollocked by "Vicky" if I didn't like a dog in my face Hmm AIBU to think it's not a good message to tell your paying customers that they come second to another species?

OP posts:
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Original poster
GunpowderGelatine · 25/02/2019 23:21

@SchadenfreudePersonified I really didn't. It's means when you compare two incomparable an unequal entities. Such as having dogs and having children

OP posts:
CuriousaboutSamphire · 26/02/2019 07:45

Apples and oranges are remarkably similar... proof? Here you go...

www.smithsonianmag.com/science-nature/comparing-apples-and-oranges-37838381/

Roussette · 26/02/2019 07:49

Now we're being silly with the apples and oranges nonsense.

Let's get back to arguing about dog cafes Grin

FemalePersonator · 26/02/2019 08:01

Good question, Schadenfreude! It was a Swedish moose, IIRC.

Streamingbannersofdawn · 26/02/2019 08:06

I don't think people are saying having a dog is exactly the same as having a child. On this thread people seem to be saying that badly behaved children running around, making a mess and a general nuisance of themselves in a cafe is equally as bad as a dog doing the same thing.

My children are older, I would avoid cafes with a play area or lots of prams or high chairs as it's not our thing. People would avoid cafes with dogs if it's not their thing.

I work with people all day by the end of it I really want to come home and spend time with my animals. It makes me feel more relaxed. A chicken has never had a go at me about something irrational, not so I could understand her anyway Smile I love my job, I like people and children but there are times when I absolutely prefer animals.

LaFreaka · 26/02/2019 08:14

Kids who are afraid of dogs have been poorly parented anyway
Last time I came across this attitude was from the owner of 2 off lead terriers who were snarling, snapping and barking at my 5 years olds - apparently that was my fault Hmm.
The reality was my dd was scared of dogs because she had encountered too many dogs who were out of control - it only took 2 occasions to cement in her brain that dogs were a threat. And then it took about 5 years of very careful and patient desensitising to help dd to overcome her fear - the final step was getting our very much adored dog...it's an awful thing to be scared of dogs and there is so little help out there to overcome it.

ScorpiaForCatra · 26/02/2019 08:27

I love dogs, I've had many dogs over the years that sadly pass away and leave a hole in your life.

But, I have to say this to certain owners out there.

Your dog running at someone can be scary. That someone has no idea your dog is friendly, no idea if the dog is going to play or bite you.

Imagine you're walking down the road, minding your own business, when a muscular, leather clad biker wielding a machete runs towards you.
You'd shit yourself, why? He might be friendly.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 26/02/2019 10:13

I don't see how OP used 'comparing apples to oranges' incorrectly, unless you're trying to argue that having dogs and having children is the same thing?

No, I'm not. When you say "It's like comparing apples and oranges" you are saying you can't compare them because although they are different they are of equal importance/worth/value/validity and therefore have equal rights.

OP is trying to say (or so I understand it - she's a bit ranty so I may have lost track of her long and winding thread), that children are much more important than dogs and so should always be given precedence because the rights of children and their carers trump those of dogs and their owners, because, you know, same species and everything . . . .

Many others agree with her; many others disagree - but "comparing apples and oranges" isn't an accurate way to describe it.

Most people on here, I'm happy to say, feel that there is room in the world for both types of establishment; some seem to feel that dog-friendly places are an abomination because they want to be able to have a coffee anywhere and everywhere they want, and they don't like to share their space with a dog, no matter how well behaved it is, due to hygiene or what-have-you.

I am more than happy to share my dog-friendly space with well-behaved children.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 26/02/2019 10:15

Thank you Personator

A big moose, then.

I'll bet that hurt!

SchadenfreudePersonified · 26/02/2019 10:18

Your dog running at someone can be scary. That someone has no idea your dog is friendly, no idea if the dog is going to play or bite you

I totally agree Scorpia - and an over-friendly dog, if large, can easily hurt someone.

I have seen parents deal well with anxious children, and I have seen them deal badly with them. Same with dog owners. None off us is perfect - we do the best we can, and hopefully, try to consider others.

FemalePersonator · 26/02/2019 10:57

I'll bet that hurt!

The moose was badly trained.

havingtochangeusernameagain · 26/02/2019 15:59

None off us is perfect - we do the best we can, and hopefully, try to consider others

And that, in the end, is the issue. If you love dogs, fine. But a considerate dog owner will not inflict them on the rest of the world.

The same applies to parents although I think comparing kids and dogs/pets generally is not a valid comparison.

Whatever your hobby or interest, a considerate person tries not to inconvenience others.

RatherBeRiding · 26/02/2019 16:10

It sounds like my kind of cafe, and I'd make a bee-line for it!

So, no, it doesn't need to rethink it's message to customers. Those of us who support its values will patronise it. Those who don't - won't.

Esspee · 26/02/2019 16:12

I love it when restaurants and hotels state they are pet friendly.
Allows me to give them a wide berth.

ClothesHangingOnTheFloor · 26/02/2019 16:24

Jeez - yes you are being unreasonable. You would be annoyed if you went in there and there were loads of dogs (given that you don't like dogs). So you can't have it both ways!!

You know not to go in there! It's clear and personally I would be delighted to see a message like this because often it's a case of checking before you go in (I have a dog). This leaves no room for doubt.

The whole world isn't there to pander to your likes and dislikes. If you don't like dogs, then go to another cafe! :)

SchadenfreudePersonified · 26/02/2019 17:18

If you don't like dogs, then go to another cafe!

But OP wants to go to that one, ClothesHanging and the cafe owner just can't see how very unreasonable she is being, preferring have nice dogs rather than naughty children.

Original poster
GunpowderGelatine · 26/02/2019 20:45

But OP wants to go to that one, ClothesHanging and the cafe owner just can't see how very unreasonable she is being, preferring have nice dogs rather than naughty children

Oh come on @SchadenfreudePersonified you're just making things up now

  1. I have never said I want this cafe to not be dog friendly. I have said I am happy not to go in it.
  2. I have said nothing about naughty children in the cafe, no one has, not even the owner - my issue was that the cafe in their own words prefer ALL dogs to humans and no matter how that dog behaves they will stick up for the dog rather than the paying customer. That was the point of my OP, that I thought the message was off.

I'm unsure if posters are being wilfully obtuse in not understanding (despite me saying it numerous times) that I don't have a problem with cafes being dog friendly, or if they're just actually rather thick. I can't decide

OP posts:
HaroldsSocalledBluetits · 26/02/2019 22:13

Jesus Christ, Schadenfreude, where do you lecture? The radio 5live phone in at 3am?

Jackie1957 · 26/02/2019 22:54

Vicky is far from unpleasant or any of the other things she’s been accused of on here. She made that post on her own Facebook page after a long day and dealing with an awkward customer. She was sounding off - don’t we all after a particularly rotten experience?

It is my granddaughter’s favourite place to eat and the service is never less than excellent. The place is gorgeous inside, a proper tea room with a theme of fairies for the kids.

I’m not a friend or relative of hers, just an ordinary customer and if you allow the tones in some of these posts to sway you, then you’re missing out. Easily one of the very best tea rooms in Cumbria and she and her staff are lovely.

liverbird10 · 27/02/2019 00:06

The more people I meet, the more I like my cat.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 27/02/2019 13:51

I don't anymore Bluetits - I am retired so am no longer Moulding Young Minds. Grin

But thanks for the tip-off. I wouldn't mind a little part-time radio phone-in show to earn a bit of pin money and fill in my few dog-free hours.

Horrordoeurvres · 27/02/2019 14:00

Nothing wrong with it at all, it simply letting you know if you don't like dogs - do not go there.

Not that big of a deal, just go somewhere else.

mydogisthebest · 28/02/2019 08:45

"Dogs are hard work"!!! But not half as hard work as children. Dogs are far easier and quicker to toilet train, they don't give you anywhere near as many sleepless nights as a baby does. My dog was toilet trained within 3 days of getting him at 9 weeks and slept through the night after 3 weeks.

They don't whine and scream and sulk and have tantrums. They don't answer back. They don't go out on their own and give you something to worry about. I have never heard of a dog taking drugs, smoking, swearing etc.

No I don't hate children but, lets be honest, quite a lot of them are a complete pain the in the arse. Oh and I certainly don't agree they are all cute. They are some downright ugly babies and children. I have never seen a dog I thought was ugly.

mydogisthebest · 28/02/2019 08:56

I have googled the café as I really want to go there now. It has brilliant trip advisor reviews 5 out of 5 in fact. 357 excellent reviews as opposed to 4 terrible reviews. So for all the miserable dog haters hoping the café fails it seems it isn't going to happen.

I don't know why people keep saying about dogs "running around" etc when they have to be kept on lead. The dog haters on here are just nasty and plain silly

I don't hate all people but I certainly dislike a lot of them. Having had the misfortune to work in retail for a few years I realise how rude, patronising, abusive and pretty stupid a hell of a lot of people are. Animals are not rude to you or abusive to you. So yes I DO prefer dogs (or cats, horses, snakes etc) to an awful lot of people.

Lizzie48 · 28/02/2019 09:29

@mydogisthebest

True, but with children they grow out of pooing into nappies or potties, mostly after 2-3 years, and then they use the toilet!! I don't need to deal with their poo ever again. Not the case with dogs, which would be my main bugbear. 🤣

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