To be irritated by people adjusting my DDs name

[Blackcelebration73]

My DD is called Megan. We call her Megan at home.
Other people seem to think it’s ok to change it to other versions:
Meg
Meggy
Megs
Her name is Megan and that is what we call her at home.
Aibu to think people should just call her by the name her parents use & not make names up?! It really bloody irritates me

I have a short name, because my parents didn't want any nicknames. People who know me well lengthen it as a form of endearment.

I called my daughter Gemmima-Milicient-Henrietta-philicity-coloratura and insist everyone use her full name whenever they address her.
By the time registration is done it's play time, but I don't care, that's her name, and should be used.

This is lesson one in not owning your child, I'm afraid. Best get over it now, saves time for later.

“I’m with the OP on this. I cannot abide people shortening my name ”

And that is your right. I hate my full name and go by a shortening.

You don’t have the right to mind on behalf of other people.

This is lesson one in not owning your child, I'm afraid. Best get over it now, saves time for later.

And what about the right of the CHILD to be called the long version of their name? Is that be discarded too then?
The issue I have there is that by letting everyone shortening the name and basically giving your child another name, you are also stripping the CHILD of their name,. Whether THEY like it or not.
If, the CHILD and then TEENAGER wants to be called another name (shortened or not), then I agree it’s up to them.
But I dint think other people have any right to do so.

What does she think? That’s all that matters really.

Does your daughter like the other versions?

If so, then that's all OK isn't it?

I dint think a child, at the age of the OP dd, can say anything like this. It’s more likely that they will they can’t say NO to the teacher/nursery worker.
I also doubt they have any feeling about ownership about their name. More likely thatbthey will just accept it ‘because That’s how things are done. A person is authority to me, one that I look up to, is doing it therefore it’s ok’.
Asking a child that age to make that sort of decision is stupid imo.

No good choosing a, can't be shortened, name....some fucker will just lengthen it!

The thing is it gets to a point where everyone is so told to suck it up that some childten will put up with being called a name they dont actually like because they dont have the confidence to say, actually my name is xxx

In early years I really think people need to use the preferred name that the child recognises as theirs. With Children developing understanding and communication skills it seems better to have a bit of consistency!

Really annoys me that people think it is ok to shorten someone's name. It's lazy and bloody rude.

My mum has a long name and it has always been shortened even though she has always told people she doesn't like it being shortened.

When she had me and my 2 siblings she purposely gave us very short names so they could not be shortened. So then people lengthened them by adding ie at the end!

If someone tells me their name is Elizabeth then I call them that. I don't call them Lizzie unless they say they prefer it.

I have 2 friends called Stephen, one wants to be called Stephen but the other prefers Steve. So I call them the name they prefer. I don't just decide to call them both Steve

My husband has a very flexible name ie: William, so gets Bill, Willy and Billy. His parents call him his full name, I call him Bill as that's how he introduced himself!
But, I fully get you. My kids have names that can't be tweaked, for this very reason!

thecats if a parent shouldn’t be owning their child, who is that ok for other people to be owning the child and imposing on them another name?
We are not talking about a child deciding they want to be called XXX but about an ADULT deciding that the child shouod be called XXX

Could you plain why it’s not ok for parents to impose a name on their child, even they chose the name and it’s their child. But somehow it’s ok for another adult, totally unrelated to the child, to impose a name on them????
I mean that unrelated adult surely shouldn’t own that child either and shouldn’t be so controlling as to impose their wish in the child?

”A child with many names is well loved”

DD has many nicknames, and each name of endearment makes me happy she’s well loved.

My DH and ALL of my good friends call me by my full name.
My entire family, acquaintances and colleagues shorten it.
Never worked that out.

The thing is it gets to a point where everyone is so told to suck it up that some childten will put up with being called a name they dont actually like because they dont have the confidence to say, actually my name is xxx

That has been dc1 experience. I know he isnt keen on the shortened version but has learnt to just accept it. What was he supposed to do when even. The teachers were shortening his name???
Now as a teen, everyone knows him as his shortened version. He had no choice in that and just had to accept it.

See all the comments and put downs on this thread along the lines of how dare you not wanting to have your name shorten. I do it because I’m being nice....

I think you need to relax on it OP. At school she will be given all sorts of mad nicknames. As a teen/young adult she may joib a death metal band and go by Slasher. You can't control this, there is no way, so there's no point stressing yourself out. Keep calling her Megan yourself and never mind anyone else unless it bothers HER.

@thegreylady Being a Joanne not a Joanna I frequently have the exact opposite issue to your DD :)

I have a name that no one shortens. It does occasionally get morphed into a bigger nickname but that never gains traction. More importantly, I'm not I'm control of other people and what they do. Came as quite a shock to me too, but there you have it.

What a load of old rubbish that calling a child by a shortened name is lovely, endearing or any other bollocks.

Unless asked to call someone by a shorter name people should be using their full name.

Why bother calling your child a certain name if it's ok and lovely for others to change it? Megan is a lovely name. Meg or Megs certainly is not

I have a Charlotte..when picking the name we thought a lot about whether we could live with Lottie or Charlie etc and decided it wasn't a big deal. I want her to be Charlotte but won't be all Hyacinth Bucket about it.

Saying that her young cousins call her "Sheltu" - no idea where this came from! It drives me up the wall

"I dint think a child, at the age of the OP dd, can say anything like this."

I have missed Op's daughter's age.

But ideally yes it shouldn't happen other than at the request of the child.

YANBU, it’s annoying and I completely feel your pain. My youngest DD has a beautiful classic name but it gets shortened often to something that sounds a little trashy and tacky. I hate it and I made sure to put her full name as her preferred name at school so it doesn’t happen there.

I never shorten my name when I introduce myself or sign off emails etc, I always use my full name. Most people use a shortened version of my name though, and only call me by my full name if I’ve been naughty 😂

I get this a lot now as an adult didn't get it as a child so much.
So say my name is Patricia. People ask my name and I tell them Patricia, they immediately reply, oh well PAT blah blah blah.
It is rude.
If I wanted to be called Pat then that is what I would say.
I'd never respond to someone who said my name is Michael with, now then Mickey.

If it is teachers at her school who are shortening her name, then yes, I think you should ask them to refer to her as Megan only. But if it's friends, then there's not much you can do. If Megan dislikes a name she is called by her friends, I'm sure she will speak up for herself in due course.

My dd didn't respond to a supply teacher once who was calling out a very old fashioned diminutive of her name.
Think Peggy instead of Margaret.
My dd had never, ever grandmother before and the entire class was baffled by who "Peggy" was!!!!