To expect DS to find a job on top of attending college?

[PoppingBubbles]

I'm unsure if I am or not. DS hasn't said he won't, however is only taking a cursory glance at job websites each week.

He attends full time college, and does well there. I think he ought to have some kind of work too. He tells me that none of his college friends work (which has been confirmed by a couple when they come here)

I just think he ought to, even a Saturday job would be fine, though weekend or evening would work well too. It's not for any money into the household, I just think it would benefit him in many ways.

At the moment, I'm not pushing the matter, as unsure if IABU

Am I expecting too much? Do your DC work as well as attend full time education?

I've worked since I was 16. Part time at college and uni. Didn't do me any harm so no I don't think you are being unreasonable! Where does he get money from at the moment? You I presume. He needs to learn the value of money, especially now!

YANBU, but on MN teens and even young adults are not expected to work and be fully supported by their parents until they're at least 25.

YANBU, but on MN teens and even young adults are not expected to work and be fully supported by their parents until they're at least 25.

I think it is the other way around in that on MN people seem to think it essential for teenagers to work even if they are in full time education and already spend six days a week at school or doing homework.

I worked during all the school holidays during 6th form. I think that was a good way to get used to working.

I had a part time job when I was at college, if anything it's beneficial. Employers are all complaining that young people are unprepared for the world of work, work experience is in my opinion essential and you are doing your child a disservice if you don't strongly encourage it. It was also thanks to working that i had savings when i went to university, meaning I didn't have to work there during term time.

I worked from 16, but in those days shops employed 16 year olds to work Saturday and one evening. If you ever have a spare week look at the recruitment site for Marks and Sparks and see if you can any hours that would suit. You will be lucky.
My dc worked in garden centres and Xmas contracts in Argos, boots and at Hollywood bowl.

Why do you want him to get a job? You mentioned it’s not because of money- well having to work whilst studying could adversely affect his grades.
If you want him to get a job in a shop I can tell you right now that’s not going to improve his job prospects with a corporate employer ( I had to do a lot of graduate/intern hiring/interviews for my firm so I know this for a fact)
It matters more that he enrols for internships over summer- so would say give him his free time during term time but suggest he applies for work experience/internships each summer instead ( or at least in 2nd year)

kisskiss not sure I agree totally. My DCs did all sorts of work and it helped them enormously when they went for the corporate employer interviews/grad schemes. They had experience to draw on. And their grades were not affected by , say, one evening a week work. They all went to their Uni of choice and got the degrees they wanted.

I can really recommend this organisation. aiesec.org/. Some of the work is paid, some voluntary. Its internships, varying in length and one DC spent 6 weeks with the Bulgarian Tourist Board travelling round, writing reports, taking pictures, promoting local culture etc. Whether bloody Brexit will affect this great Organisation, goodness knows, it'll be a big big shame.

Grades won't be effected by one evening a week but that it almost impossible to find in many if not all parts of the country. DD's friends have to work at least two evenings on school nights or a whole day at the weekend and that either effects grades or it means the child's life is a complete drudge. I don't work seven days a week and I don't expect my children to either. There is plenty of time to gain work experience at university during the summer holidays.

He isn't at college 9-4 every day it is fine to suggest he gets a job Saturday jobs are like hens teeth but he has 4 days he could be earning. Mine worked and studied it kept petrol in their cars and money for the odd night out I don't see it as a huge deal.

He could work, yanbu, the ft courses are over 3 days.

My dds worked and did A-levels

I don't know why pp are going on about Coperate employers and retail work thinking like that is really insular not everybody works for a coperate employer.

I had a part time job at sixth form, so did all of my friends, mostly in retail at a local shopping centre that was open late, I waitressed at a local pub restaurant. I got four A levels at A grade (highest possible grease at the time) I also worked part time term time and more in the holidays throughout uni as did all of my friends, most of whom had been privately educated and are from very well off families. I don't know when this expectation changed and teens became precious flowers who need to be so protected.

Tbh I think it is only on MN that teenagers young / adults are this cosseted, all my Dc friends worked and college/unis even the girl whos dad was a treasurer for a bank worked in a supermarket at the weekend.

Yes. All my DC's friends did something. Even if it was spasmodic. They did some sort of work. So it's only on MN that it will ruin them if they do work whilst being educated.

One of my DCs had a relatively intensive Uni course even though it wasn't lecture heavy, but worked 2 nights a week in a restaurant.

People often say on threads like these that a part time job in sixth form is beneficial to future employment prospects. I think that's becoming less and less true, and it seems lots of posters agree. Unless it's a job relevant to the field the teenager wants to go into, I'd say voluntary work is likely to be of more assistance when it comes to getting established in a career.

I've recruited, including people in their early 20s/not long out of education stage, and having done a few hours a week in a shop, café etc from 17 onwards just wouldn't have been at all relevant for the field. Which is a fairly niche one, granted, but experience of the sector (ie in a voluntary capacity) would be much more important.

I'm not saying this is a good thing, as it's detrimental to social mobility imho, and certainly part time jobs in college can teach some very beneficial things. But I'd be wary of assuming they do anything much for long term employability.

Surely a bit of independance is good for older teenagers though even if it is only an evening pub job or a Saturday in Tesco it is their own money they have earned by their own effort I don't think that is a bad thing really.

I had part time job and volunteered when I was a student.

What college course is he doing that's only 3 days per week with no work sent home?

Surely 3 day per week courses are vocational and assume linked work experience the other two days?

I'm doing a college course atm - Tuesday and Wednesday 8am - 4:30pm at college, around 30 exams per year to revise for plus three reports (around 40 pages), and two longer projects per year done entirely separately to the college day drawing closely on work experience. We're visited at work 3 times a year by a lecturer - we have to be working at least 20 hours per week in the job we're training to do.

I also have 3 kids (1 primary, 2 secondary) but that's obviously not a course requirement my classmates are mostly childless early 20s, though a few are late 40s-50 with grown up children, sadly the others with young and school age kids have dropped out.

3 days per week = expectation that you're also working say 14 hours per week.

A levels full time and I don't think it's ideal to have to do paid work, and if it's for CV building it can be done in summer holidays.

I lived rurally during A levels and couldn't have got to a Saturday job easily - one bus per day village. I worked in the summertime when a tourist attraction ran a works bus to pick workers up.

@uptheapplesandpears totally agree with what you said!
@roussette well just saying what I know to be true in my sector ( it’s a very competitive one) when I first applied I put my waitressing experience at 17 on my cv. Now I look at all the cvs we consider and I feel embarrassed as it looks unprofessional. Volunteer work has a lot more clout.. and of course summer internships in a relevant fiekd. Interviews at that lvl are competency based but everyone has loads of experiences at uni they can use to show teamwork/leadership/communication skills/ problem solving/initiative etc...

Anyway, the above is only really relevant if the OP was thinking about her DSs future job prospects .. in competitive fields like banking consulting law... maybe she was thinking about something else, in which case ignore the Above! Just chucking in my two cents Cos I wish my parents had given me better advice.. I took the long route to get to where I am. Also, the reason I mentioned money is some of my classmates had to work during school as they were finding themselves.. and I know they definitely had a harder time all round

Funding themselves, not finding themselves

kisskiss maybe times I've changed, my DCs are late twenties/early thirties and 2 of them did exactly that (waitressing, reception work at a restaurant plus other odds an sods) and are in the fields you mention. So it worked for them.

I don't think it's unprofessional when you are applying for a first job/grad scheme to say you worked at McDonalds on a weekend or waitressing in a pub. It showed you went out there and actually did something but what do I know

I think he should definitely be looking for work. That said DS wasn't successful in finding anything and from what he's said the friends who gave jobs came by them through people they knew.

Additionally a few of his friends who has jobs in Y12 have now dropped them to concentrate on A level studies.

(DS himself now working full time so no longer relevant for him)

Maybe employers shouldn't be so dissmisive of Mcdonalds at 17 jobs not every parent can or wants to fund their teenagers social life and the fact is not all kids have the financial back up to be able to volunteer.

I had a weekend job (sometimes just Saturday sometimes both days) from the age of 14 until I went into college, halfway through the college asked me to quit it. They didn't think I was coping that well, I was doing all of my work however I was constantly tired and feeling run down. I quit and passed everything with distinction.

I was the only one in my class with a job and they told me that they'd rather students didn't have jobs.