To expect DS to find a job on top of attending college?

[PoppingBubbles]

I'm unsure if I am or not. DS hasn't said he won't, however is only taking a cursory glance at job websites each week.

He attends full time college, and does well there. I think he ought to have some kind of work too. He tells me that none of his college friends work (which has been confirmed by a couple when they come here)

I just think he ought to, even a Saturday job would be fine, though weekend or evening would work well too. It's not for any money into the household, I just think it would benefit him in many ways.

At the moment, I'm not pushing the matter, as unsure if IABU

Am I expecting too much? Do your DC work as well as attend full time education?

I’m not sure it’s always a good idea. In Y12 my ds worked in a pub Saturday evenings usually til 2am back between 3-4am and was constantly stressed, tired and not really doing great at college.

It got to the point where he wouldn’t consider another job, he has mates there, so I paid him not to work basically - his grades are up in the A*- A n he’s a lot happier. He spends a lot of time studying as well as socialising, but less time gaming as he’s not as tired.

He works in the holidays. If he got a little job in a shop, or was a lifeguard (which he’s qualified for) maybe it would be ok but doing 8/9 hours in that environment really did affect him and his studies.

My ds is still only in year 11 and isn't 16 for a couple of weeks and he was talking about this recently.
He said he doesn't know how he would cope if he had a job and the coursework and revision for GCSE's.

He will start at a fantastic 6th form in September assuming he gets the grades he needs and the day is long and lots of home study is expected.
Ds's dad has his own business and has said that he can do some work for him if he wants ( it's a photography based business and very social ) as we want him to concentrate on his A levels.
We will fund him throughout college and expect him to look for something at 18 when he starts uni.

My parents forced me to get a job during sixth form. I went from an A*-A student at GCSE to just scrapping the A-Levels I needed for university. It was awful, I was constantly tired and depressed, I never had any time to just relax, it was awful!

I think with 4 free days and not much homework he could get a job

But it isn't as easy as it sounds

Companies won't work around his hours ime

Yes, ComefromAway, it often seems on threads like these that it is a family attitude to work. Eg I wouldn't use the expression 'good work ethic'. It's just work. Or maybe I have a good life ethic .

The kid with work experience on their CV always has the edge over one with none.

Even a couple of hours a week- transferable skills.

Also instils a good work ethic.

DD works 4 hrs on a Sunday in a shop... I got told (by some MN posters) that I should be topping her income off to the tune of £50+ a week in addition to what she earns. MN is weird.

When young I was terrified of world of work but at least I tried to find jobs. The only way to get past my nerves was to get jobs & I wish I had worked more when I was 16-18, to gain confidence & understand better how adulthood functions.

I have happy to support my lot while they focus on their studies
And what about when they just stay taking course after course, then a Masters etc.... I know a few kids who've done this, they're still doing to Uni at 27!

With the interviews they went for when they were out of education, I have no idea what they would've talked about if they hadn't taken part time jobs.

'Tell me about a time you had to work with a difficult person
Tell me about a time when you managed conflict
Tell me about a time when you've had to deal with a difficult person'

Now, maybe you could answer those questions relating it to school, Uni or friends or whatever, but it's a helluva lot easier if you can draw on some work experience, even if it's just a part time small job! It was hilarious some of the answers my kids came up with, pretty inventive

Ds is doing maths further maths physics and chemistry. He works Sat and Sun plus 2 or 3 evenings most weeks and usually full time during school holidays.

Personally I think it's too much but he won't listen to me ;)

I had a waitressing job from 16, working about 10 hours a week.

When I went to university other than a total six month period, I had a part time job in retail for the whole three year course, working 18 hours a week. I earned approximately £500 a month which meant I could save my whole student loan.

Ended up saving 7k by the start of third year and subsequently bought a 2 year old Fiat 500 with 22k miles on it. Still have it six years later 😁

I do think the skills they learn and the independence required to have a job is invaluable and helps them in their studies.

It's about learning that self responsibility

Where I work we have the occasional teenager in for work experience. We have had about 8 in over the past few years.

The one we had this week is the only one to have been any good at all in terms of showing an interest, listening and doing what has been asked of her, turning up on time and showing a good work ethic.

She is the only work experience girl we have had in who has a part time job as well as being in full time college. She said if she had come to us before getting her job she would only speak if spoken to. Her job has given her a lot more confidence. She would certainly be offered a part time job from us if she wanted some extra work.

There are so many benefits to getting some work experience in early. It goes way beyond having some extra money in my opinion.

Uni is easier if they have less contact hours (depends on course) and a lot of holiday time to work/volunteer

Plenty of time to build up those examples for interviews. Or you could just lie, like everyone else does. It's pretty easy to invent a couple of part time jobs from when you were 16 along with some relevant examples of skills. Teaches lifeskills in itself, in fact.

Hopefully won't have to support them as long as 27!! But if that's what is required then needs must.I do think vacation jobs are fine,and work experience type things specific to their studies. But I don't want them doing minimum wage jobs during term times

I can’t see how it’s possible to perform st your best for a levels and have a part time job.

If you take 4 A levels you don’t have that many free periods. And you need your frees to keep on top of the work. Or I did anyway.

If you don’t need the money and your child is putting the effort in at school, why make life harder for your child than it has to be?

Plenty of time later to get a job.

I could have managed a job easily at uni - however I played sport at a national level instead which took up every weekend and week time in the week.

I worked in the holidays.

I also worked full time whilst having a ‘gap year’ so I started uni with quite a bit of cash saved as I didn’t have to pay keep or anything.

My DS had three full days at college and worked part time (early mornings, afternoons and weekends) at Greggs - because they could fit around his college schedule. He was on a two year business management course, but left a few months early as he has got an accountancy apprenticeship and as this is the area he wants to go into, it made more sense to finish his college and start full time. He loves having weekends now, but says that working was good as it gave him more money and experience.

I worked 16 hours a week on top of Sixth Form and A Levels. I did stop the job 2 months before the exams started though. I also had a part-time job throughout university.

During my years in full-time employment I have also studied for a Masters, a GCSE and two A Levels. So it's possible to work and study at the same time. You just need good time management and to enjoy what you do.

I'm shocked at the replies. My eldest 2 both went/ go to ss grammar schools. Eldest did IB - huge work load. Had a job working 5-6 hrs a week. It gave her a brilliant work ethic and taught her time and money management. She's now at Oxford, so clearly didn't affect her grades. DD2 at college 5 days a week, studying for 4 A levels. She works every Saturday night waitressing. Most of her friends have some sort of job. They need to learn some independence and some basic work skills. They both love having their own money Dd1 went off inter railing for 4 weeks after she'd finished exams with the money she'd saved. Brilliant experience

I went to uni full time and managed to work. I worked 10 hours on a Saturday and 3 morning shifts 6-9am. During the holidays I worked full time taking on a variety temporary jobs.

My husband studied medicine and like nearly every other student managed a job and a very full on degree.

DD2 had a paid Saturday job. Before that she volunteered for Oxfam and the National Trust. I'm a firm believer that work teaches valuable life skills. She did just fine at A level.

Of course they should get a job. Everyone I knew had a part time job whilst doing a'levels and in uni and it never affected our grades.

My parents made me work weekends and holidays and it taught me that work is a miserable chore that stops you from enjoying your life. It instilled nothing in me about the benefits of work beyond earnin money, didn’t give me a ‘work ethic’ or reach me responsibility. It just filled me with resentment and a hatred of the world of work that has remained with me! Everyone needs downtime.

100% he should! I worked 12 hours a week from 16 years old during my gcses.

I worked 2 evenings 5-9 and sunday 10-2

He needs to start earning money ro pay for phone, travel etc

Continue to encourage him to find a job. My son is studying A levels and works as a lifguard. He will gain independence and hopefully use his spare time more constructively.

@CaptainBrickbeard i loved my part rime job, ended up staying with company for 8 years.

How are you going to enjoy life if you have no money?

I love my job and going to work