9 year old daughter told to wear sports bra/crop top

[movinonup]

DD came to me last night saying that she needed a sports bra or crop top for P.E in the future as the teacher had told this to a group of girls who had been doing gymnastics and their tshirts had fallen down when doing handstands .

I can only assume this is to cover up their 9 year old nipples for fear of...........what exactly?

Are the boys to cover their nipples also?

AIBU to be cross about this?

[movinonup]

I emailed the school last night, No response as yet,

[TrendyNorthLondonTeen]

"Some of them are easily a C cup at that age

9?!

Wtf am I reading?"

What's so shocking?

[ChinaCrisis]

Some of them are easily a C cup at that age

9?!

Wtf am I reading?

My daughter started her periods at 9 and definitely needed a bra

[RiverTam]

do people seriously think it is within a teacher's remit to 'introduce' and 'normalise' the wearing of specific pieces of underwear, that for many girls and women will never be a necessity?

Again, Jesus fucking Christ.

[Confusedbeetle]

Try to understand this from your daughters point of view, I well remember wanting a bra before I needed one because I was self-conscious that I hadn't started to develop when others had. There is no way I could tell this to my mother. If you do want to ask the teacher, I would be asking what she thinks, not criticising what she said. As others have said it might have been from a very caring perspective. These issues can be mortifying for a little girl on the brink. Don't make a big issue of it. The issues of covering or not are not just our issues. We need to make life easier for them. Yes I agree not force society's rules on them, just dont embarass them any more

[JennieLee]

Some girls in my daughter's class at primary school would wear the hijab. The teacher didn't suggest that all girls did this in order to normalise wearing a headscarf and 'protect' all girls from the male gaze.

[Wallywobbles]

@lisa DSD was a C cup and had periods at 9. She was on the upper end of physical development in her class but not alone. Sadly the primary school provided no sanitary bins so that made it all worse.

[movinonup]

@Confusedbeetle did you miss my last post?

I bought DD cropped top/soft bra style things at the start of the year, At her request. She just doesn't want to wear them.
Trust me she has no problem talking to me about such things.

[leccybill]

My DD is 9 (Y4) and she wears a vest still, as do most of her classmates.

[pumpastrotter]

@lisasimpsonssaxophone I was C at 9 first bra at 7 - in fact, I had a bigger chest in yr 6 than I do now and basically stopped growing at 11. Very young developer, it happens so don't be so dismissive.

9 is a perfectly acceptable age for girls to start wearing training bras or crop tops, they're more aware of themselves and so are boys and at that age should know about puberty. Not the teacher's call to tell them they need them, but I would find it hard to be angry about it being brought up.

[Ifangyow]

It's entirely up to you and your daughter when she wears a bra or crop top, not her teacher. The girls can tuck their t.shirts into their shorts if needs be.
My now adult daughter takes after me with a large chest. She wore bras while at school simply so she didn't get teased. That was her choice and hers alone. The day she left school she threw them all in the bin and has never worn one since. Again, her choice.
You need to tell the teacher to concentrate on her job and leave the parenting to the parents.

[PorkPatrol]

Just because none of the girls in her class have breasts in your opinion (though I’m not sure how you would have inspected all their bare chests to be so sure they’re not beginning to develop??) then it doesn’t mean children in other classes might not or that they haven’t had the issue before.
Do you honestly think it would be more acceptable for a pe teacher to single out the early developers and tell just them that they need to cover up than for it to be part of the girls uniform?
Just buy some comfortable cropped tops.

[Missingstreetlife]

Nobody needs a bra, they are a fashion item, invented by the film industry in living memory. Some people feel more comfortable wearing one for support or modesty, some do not. Whether women young or old should cover their breasts, full or flat is another matter. If the boys don't like it they shouldn't look

[anniehm]

I suspect all the girls in her year were told so as not to single out those who are more developed and at any point they may start to hit puberty. I

[JacquesHammer]

Cannot believe people think this is within the teacher’s remit!

Surely an easier solution would be “t-shirts tucked in for PE” across the board.

[newhousestress]

Did the teacher really say this?

[Marcipex]

Of course parents should do the parenting, but some don't.

[lisasimpsonssaxophone]

I take it back and didn’t mean to sound rude, I am sorry. I was just genuinely surprised at the idea of 9 year olds needing C-cup bras.

I was the first girl to get breasts in my year and it wasn’t until I was 11, and my first bra was a B cup. I don’t recall bras even being on my radar at 9.

I don’t think it should be up to a teacher to tell a 9 year old to cover up though, that still doesn’t sit right with me.

[movinonup]

@PorkPatrol I don't make a habit of inspecting girls' bare chests no, but as these are my daughters friends who I regularly take to or see at swimming/gymnastics I stand by my previous comment that these particular girls are not in need of support.

Why in the world should it be made a uniform item just because one or two in her year have need of it?

Should they all have glasses so a few don't feel singled out?
Shall we give them all braces regardless of need?

[Butterfly84]

I agree with pps that it's not up to a teacher to decide what the children wear. However, maybe it's just something that the teacher says to the 9 year olds each year as obviously breasts can begin to form at that age. I'm not saying the comment is fair or okay, but imagine if you worked into a sports hall and there were girls doing handstands with their breasts on display with a teacher supervising. Maybe they're just trying to protect themselves from appearing inappropriate.

[LuckyLou7]

Both my daughters chose to wear crop tops under their school uniform, from an early age, possibly due to peer pressure, because every other little girl wore them. I went along with it, because I had no wish for my girls to be a target for being different. Both daughters are now women in their 20's and are not the least bit traumatised about covering up their prepubescent chests.

[lljkk]

"None of the girls in question have anything resembling actual breasts, They are all skinny or muscular wee things."

So only those who are developed... should be singled out. Think about it. It's a kindness to make it blanket advice.

[movinonup]

@JacquesHammer that would be the sensible solution wouldn't it?

For boys and girls in the name of neatness and health & safety, all shirts should be tucked in during P.E, Job done.

[mansneverhot]

No one NEEDS to wear a bra. There's some really weird attitudes on this thread. Who is it that these children need to wrap up and protect themselves from, the 9 year old boys or the adults in the room? Clearly they aren't "flashing" on purpose. Serious body shaming and double standards going on here. The girls should wear the underwear they feel most comfortable in, end of. #freethenipple